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For Mr. Assertive, since all of this DHV, ecc, is outdated for you, what is something fresher and natural to read?
I have to be honest, devaluing the other while valuing yourself (and many MM gimmickry) seems to work well for me to bang chicks around, but I have problems then losing the frame a bit and showing my real self which is obviously lower value (not saying I'm a low value guy, just saying that the rebalancing you do in first dates which sparks attraction very hardly transitions into empathy and you risk losing the attraction too).
I'm kind of tired of this whole impress, value/devalue method, I'm not really anymore interested into picking dozens of girls every quarter, I'm much more interested into having healthier relationships without frame and power struggles.
And yes, I know it may not fit a PUA forum, but where else could I ask such stuff?
If MM works for you then whatever...personally, I just don't see the point in a DHV. I don't really talk about myself or put details out there for people to like me. At first I thought I had trouble being vulnerable but it just never occurred to me to brag about myself. I'm naturally private. The funny thing is that it creates mystery. Not because i want to be mysterious, it's just a natural cause and effect from being naturally private.
If such things come up in conversation then I will entertain it for a bit, but that's about it. Only if it's relevant. I never understood why I had to prove myself to anyone other than myself. Only people I want to prove myself to is my family since they look up to me. They helped me when I was down so I just want to make them proud. Other people, not so much unless I respect them for helping me in some way and I just want to be a good person and return the favor. That's why I am a little harsher on women who have this whole "I'm pretty, so you should treat me this way". I don't fall for it. I don't know them and I won't be seeking validation in such a way.
Approach a genuine way. Its a better connection and you'll get your healthy relationship that way.
Edit: And as you see, I'm not forcing you to adopt it if you don't want to. If it works for you then like I said whatever man.
Genuine, meaning not having the usual strong frame and bla bla bla, just doesn't work for me, I could go months without getting laid. Literally. Girls aren't attracted to introverts, people that like coding and many other things and people that are often deep thinkers and love to talk about life and stuff. This just doesn't work.
Yes, I could tell you that I got into 20 women even like that during my life, and I could tell you that I had the best relationships coming out of "being myself", but it doesn't work day to day. And 20, over 14 years, is barely more than 1 woman/year.
But with my usual funny/strong/masculine/active frame I have (which is also a part of me, I'm not just an introvert or shy, ecc)? Then it's MUCH easier.
I had a break up like 5-6 months ago, a rough one, I wasn't into picking up and I would approach women for what I was in the moment and it was a tragedy, think I dated only two women, none closed.
But with my "pick up frame"? 4 sets closed in 3 weeks, with a 100% hitmark.
That's why I'm always confused. If I meet somebody and play with the PUF then I have no problem atleast getting one date but then I don't know how to transition into showing vulnerabilities and such and "the rest". If I play a more genuine/natural game then I have problems distinguishing myself from the other "regular guys that don't get laid".
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Do both aqualol. Why not have solid inner frame and use tactics? As opposed to going all in on one?
Not following.