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I don't know Neo, maybe my thinking is somehow flawed. But I know what would I do if I was in OPs situation.
If she doesn't like it she knows where the doors are.
I'm not saying your thinking is wrong, I'm asking the why? Cause I cant figure it out myself whats wrong with it and it seems like no one can verbalize why it is disrespectful or a "no no."
This has far more to do about projecting an insecure sense of self, than the situation at hand.
If you can't trust your girl around people, you have to ask yourself if there's any basis behind this. If not, then its frankly your issue - if you can't handle a girl who can handle herself then find an insecure girl who'll agree to your ridiculous conditions.
It's called CO-DEPENDENCY, and a lot of you guys will vehemently deny this, but the reality is if you're giving a girl an ultimatum for hanging out with a guy - and the simple fact that you're giving an ultimatum to begin with says either something about the state of your relationship, and/or something about your insecurities being projected onto others.
If it's the later, then I wonder what most of you guys would do in the reverse situation where it was an attractive girl wanting to hangout with you whilst you were in a committed relationship. I would hazard a guess in that you would go along with it and let whatever happens happen - and this is why you'd take issue with your woman doing the same, as you don't even trust yourselves.