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I honestly believe that most women who slept with me, had zero intention of doing so earlier in the night. Girls think differently when they're horny than when they're calm and in a normal mode. It's also why moving slower than I'm really inclined to do, works well.
Much like you, I like to kiss her neck, and run my fingers down her arm at first. It's fairly harmless, yet also effective. That gets her pretty turned on, so at that point she's coming from a different state of mind than she was an hour ago. And that is what leads to total body exploration, usually fingering and then sex.
You can't logically convince a woman to sleep with you. Sex for women is somewhat different than men, but they have more in common than differences. Imagine a 250lb war pig approached you and gave a great speech about how awesome she is at sex, and that you should fuck her, because you'll love it. Would it persuade even you? And men are generally more logically driven than women are.
You can tell who you want to fuck mostly by looking at them. It's more complex than that for women, but almost none of it has to do with logic. It's nearly all emotional.
war pig lol