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Everyone wants to be different, but people are all the same. You value what you have to work for and sacrifice for more than whats given to you. That's just human nature.
Its also natural to be attached to an outcome when you want something. If you don't care if you get the girl I don't think you like her very much.
It doesn't matter if you're outcome dependent. What matters is that you have self-discipline and can control yourself and act rationally even when you have a passion for someone.
You're jumping to conclusions...
Actually you got it the opposite... nearly everyone wants to fit in.... which is why people have psychological break downs when not included.... kids in school suffer huge life long self-esteem issues. Very few of us go against the grain... the key is those that go against the grain are those that have what all those other guys to want. If you want what the masses have then be regular... get laid by your 6 total women in your life. I on the other hand joined this website to fuck women and multiple women at that.
When you don't care if you get the woman that is when you get the woman... when you value yourself more than her and know she is missing out... self-confidence and self-esteem. This basic dude... when you show her you don't need her she realizes you have plenty of other potential mates and that makes her more assume you are a higher value male. (Basics dude... we haven't even got past chapter 1 here)
Yes it completely matters whether you are outcome dependent this changes your frame and your entire perspective... let me give you an example.
2 guys walk up to a girl...
They both walk up and say to a girl "Hi, you are a beautiful woman with great style... What was your name?"
Now one guy gets blown out... the other guy builds instant attraction.
What's the difference? One guy walks up with self-confidence he says it because he feels that way and he wants to meet the girl.... but doesn't really give a fuck if she is attracted this is his natural behavior...
The other goes up and does it because he needs her validation... and because he thinks she'll be attracted if he says such a thing.... because he finds her attractive he wants to trade a compliment for her attraction to him.
Now I'm not asking if this happens I'm telling you it happens... I'm telling you I was those two different guys and have said lines just like that and got exact opposite reactions... The difference? My level of self-confidence and self-esteem... the frame I had when I walked up to the girl. I didn't walk up like I needed her approval like the outcome of my entire emotional state was based on her reaction to my words...
I agree that you should act rationally and with self-discipline but only until you eliminate that behavior or you're needy behaviors and mindset will leak out... and you'll fuck yourself somewhere in the courtship process...
And yes I don't give a fuck if a woman doesn't approve of me... that's her opinion... and she's welcome to it. Even if she is attractive and I have a crush on her... I don't say shit I don't mean... in other words I don't say shit for her ears... I say it because I mean it... THAT IS HOW MAN ACTS.
Outcome dependence is a sign of low self-esteem... this is something I've talked to you about... your low self-esteem. Those with high self-esteem don't worry as much about it... They do THEIR THING because THEY WANT TO... See outcome dependence in one aspect is fine... you don't scream bitch at a woman at work so you can keep your job. At the same time walking up to a girl is not the same.... we are talking about you valuing a woman and her approval of you more than your own opinion.
Someone with high self-esteem gets knocked down... then goes on to be a success in whatever he wants.... someone with low self-esteem on the other hand... gets knocked down and feels that this is a sign of his true value... Outcome dependence = assuming your value based off of someone/something else(1 example of it also known a low self-esteem)..
You have literally some of the sharpest most experienced guys on this forum trying to teach you.... why do you think that is? It's because you'd don't know an ass from a face... you had some decent concepts but nothing more... overall you are so off it's ridiculous.
And yes I would do the same thing for a fat girl and the ugly girl... my behaviors don't extend just to beautiful women... It's a part of my behavior.... I've given people rides at 3 am in the morning because I wanted to help them... Being a GREAT GUY is a good thing... and it's a part of my own NATURAL behaviors however I don't do nice things tentative on them thinking I'm nice. I don't expect shit for it... that is outcome dependence... My behaviors are independent of other people's thoughts.
Peace and love,
Vic
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Just another guy from back in the day.
Blogging again living life:
http://www.Scienceofnaturalgame.com