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It takes more energy to focus on negatives but you seem to enjoy or prefer this method.If you can focus on the positives,it's much easier and effective.Look at the bright side of life why do the opposite?Life is short make full use while you can. Good luck.
The problem is my philosophy. Every time I try to think of anything positive, beautiful, calming etc. my "smart" brain sets in and tells me all the shit about it, like it was absolute truth and I'd be lieing to myself if I didn't know the negatives.
Life is gray and meaningless to the "smart" or I could call it logical mind.
The emotional mind doesn't care about borders however. I read only a few pages of "Wild At Heart" by John Eldredge and I seem to have opened my emotional mind.
PS. I seem to not be in control of my mind at all, the mind is a tool that protects me and shows me the world for what it truly thinks it is.
And thanks for the reply, much appreciated.

Well..1st off can you even sense what your thinking? Then are you able to start tracing back the memories of WHY your following such a pattern?
A simple exercise would be use an elastic and snap your wrist each time your having a negative thought. Or a variation of such. As of the "smart" brain part..end of the day- you live your life and you control your actions- all of them. So, your going have to tell it to shutup. Its doing it out of reaction due to past experiences and until you can "chill" and be "still" your going keep running in circles.
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^ The link covers ALOT and talks about mentalities, actions, lifestyle development which will eventually lead to a positive outlook. However, it assumes your practicing the exercises.