First off I would like to thank the PUA community for their contributions to this thread so far! Secondly here is a quick update.
Update:
After reading through the advice contributed by the community, the general vibe I received was that I am over thinking! Every relationship starts off with a burst of attraction and depending on the couple the nature of that relationship can either develop or sputter out.
Concerning my worries about texting. Naturally as time goes on we won't text each other quite as often as we did at the initial attraction stage, however we do text each other back and forth a decent amount. (1-2 long conversations in the afternoon and then a long conversation at night).
I think at this stage my relationship is "stable" however I would like to maintain high attraction and interest! I've been looking through quite a couple PUA blogs concerning long term relationships and I've gotten some good material so far that I'll probably post about in a couple of hours! (Keep watching this thread
Responses to Comments:
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Make yourself less available, freeze her out. C'mon man, you are acting AFC right now! Snap out of it!!! Basically the reason you are constantly are worried about when she texts is because you are wondering if she is with someone else. Trust me, I know from experience. Don't worry about it, the more you force yourself on her, the more she will push away. Try hooking up with some other girls to give you some perspective on that particular relationship, maybe you just got used to the idea of her. GFTOW and I guarantee she'll be trying to monopolize your attention.
While I wouldn't actually "hook up" with another girl as this is a more serious relationship, I would like to highlight something that you said "Make yourself less available". In my opinion this seems like good advice as I should be the one calling the shots and controlling the flow of communication. Any thoughts on this?
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Definetly not. It never ends up in your favor over time. What you can possibly do, if you want more texts from her, is use a combination of NLP tactics and verbal ju-jitsu in a creative pattern that subconsciously embeds the values of open and timely communication.
"Verbal ju-jitsu", I'm going to have to remember that one. It's rather amusing. Good stuff.
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OP I'm going through a similar stage.
I'm approaching 9 months with my GF now (I think!) and we are both thinking long term (love/kid names etc Laughing )
I'm really REALLY digging her; she is both sexually and mentally attractive.
I am also an over thinker, but I realize it only really affects me in my part time job (low skilled repetitive work)... so get your mind active. Exercise, learn a language, learn an instrument, drink, smoke, go to the cinema...anything like this when you're not with her (the first three will also improve you as a person whether that is with her in the long term or not).
I would say me and her are 'comfortable' now...but to be honest I don't want this stage to be like that forever and stagnate... I wanna keep things like the initial 6 months too.
I gotta keep an eye on this thread. You're not alone OP!
It's great to hear that you are in such a loving long-term relationship! It's also great to hear that you also wonder about similar things to me. I definitely am working on being active and being my own person because honestly that's what attracted her in the first place! Do you currently live together?
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Ya know, my current GF, actually of 9 months, had zero long term experience. After a month or two she sincerely told that she has those butterflies and hot feelings and do not want to miss them in the future. I said "Honey, it's natural we both will change our feelings. They will not go away - they will evolve and will grow into more mature feelings, not worse than those we have now but actually better". Now as 9 months have passed, it's true that feelings had changed and we both agree - for the best.
Very wise. The girl I am dating does not have any long-term relationship experience either so I guess she's still learning.
- NoPlease