| An update in the life of LeDuke
This update is going to be about me. The reason for this update is I realize I have been omitting day time interactions when I shouldn't be. Even though these interactions are short or seem lame in my eyes, I should post them anyway so I can reflect on them and see where I have grown or what I can do to next time. Let me first say that in my social circle and areas I'm comfortable, I'm the life of the party. When it comes to strangers, I tend to be an introvert. So here are some of the social interactions I've had when I'm not with Hank. Hopefully this update won't be all over the place.
HB#1: Girl I used to work with when I was in high school.
I ran into this girl at my gym. I approached her and we exchanged pleasantries. Small talk and I didn't go for the # when I should have. If for nothing else practice. The next time I saw her at the gym, we talked a little more and this time I did ask for her number. She gave it to me and I texted her so she'd have mine. While exchanging texts, she mentioned her b/f. I framed it as her coming onto me and me not willing to help her cheat on her b/f. The next time I saw her at the gym she had a cute friend with her. They just finished a zumba class. I approached and did a funny, gangster handshake with her. She then says to her friend:
HB: This is the guy that used to call me B-rad (a nick name I had given her). We used to work together.
ME: *as I put my arm around her* Oh don't lie. We used to be lovers, but it didn't work out and now she's embarrassed about it.
Friend: Haha, oh I see. Yea I've heard about the B-rad days
Apparently she had been talking about me to her friend. We had some more small talk and then I told B-rad she was rude for not introducing me to her friend and made her do so. I then nicknamed her friend Z-rad and they are now the dynamic duo. A nice little inside joke I can play with them.
HB#2: The girl at the grocery store.
There was no interaction with this girl...at all. She was a 9 and as soon as I saw her, I wanted to approach her. I was overwhelmed with AA. She was holding some of those smart choice meals. I thought about opening her by asking if they were any good. I hesitated and she walked off. I missed my shot. I'm posting this as a reminder to myself of the feeling of regret of not knowing what would have happened.
HB#3: Cashier at grocery store
This was a mixed girl with glasses that works at my grocery store. This interaction was easy because I wasn't really attracted to her and didn't care if she liked me or not. I chose to game her a little to practice holding eye contact. Here's how it went:
ME: Hey do you get a lot of compliments on your glasses?
HB: Not really. Well, maybe when I first got them I did
ME: Really? I've got a friend who wears frames kind of like that and he gets hit on all the time. It really isn't fair, I can't get any attention when I'm out with him.
HB: Well I normally wear contacts, but...*I cut her off*
ME: But glasses are the new trend and you want to fit in. I get it. It's fashionable. I only wish I needed glasses so I could be fashionable too. Damn my perfect eye sight.
HB: Haha no, no. I just see better with them.
ME: Yea, sure. Listen, you don't have to justify your reasons to me.
*More small talk for a bit then she handed me my receipt*
HB: Have a nice night.
ME: You too. Oh, and by the way...I really like your glasses *intense eye contact*
She was blushing at that point. During most of the interaction she would not hold eye contact with me. She looked down a lot and smiled. It was good practice and I had fun with it.
HB#4: Girl at the gas station.
My brother was with me when I pulled up to get gas. An HB7 was pumping gas in front of me. We both agreed she was pretty hot and I knew I had to open her. I stepped out of my car...and hesitated. Wasn't sure what to say, but then I just said, "fuck it! Just say hi". So, I did:
ME: Hi, how's it going?
HB7: Pretty good, you?
ME: I'm doing well. So, you want to line these bad boys up after this and race? (I drive an S2000, she drove a camry lol)
HB7: Haha, yea! Bring it!
ME: How much HP that bad boy got?
HB7: Uhhh, I'm not good with that kind of stuff. I dunno. 2? 5? 25?
ME: Wow, you really aren't. You have no idea what you're saying right now, do you?
HB7: Haha, I really don't.
*at this point she's finishing up*
ME: Now wait for me. We have to race.
HB7: Haha, no I can't. I really need to go. Bye.
ME: Ok, well have a nice night.
Something I should have done was told her to come to me and then asked her name and attempted to fluff talk about, then maybe go for the number close. None the less, I was happy that I at least opened her.
HB#5: The HB8 at the gym
This girl and I were both about to use the same machine. She asked if I was going to and I told her no, she was and that I'd use the one next to her first. After she finished up, she then went to the machine to the left of me. When I finished, I jumped on the machine she used first and she jumped on the one I just finished on. After I had finished my sets, I opened her:
ME: Excuse me...
HB8: Yes?
ME: Listen, I'm about to go do shoulders. You're not going to steal anymore of my equipment are you?
HB8: Haha, no.
ME: Ok, good because I'd really hate to fight you for it and you mess up my pretty face.
HB8: Hahaha, oh no. You're fine.
ME: You sure?
HB8: Yea, I'll let you this time
ME: Ok, I appreciate it.
I'm not sure if I should have pushed the interaction further or not. My eye contact sucked and I feel weird about interrupting someone's workout. So, I just went on and finished my workout.
HB#6: Girl on treadmill at gym
This girl was an HB9.5. She's the type of girl I'm weak for. She was running on the treadmill. I wanted to approach her, but again I just feel like interrupting a workout is rude and I'm weird about it. I was also afraid to get blown out in front of people. So, once again, I pussed out. Just another reminder to myself of how much I was kicking my ass later about it. Maybe I'll see her again.
I still have some AA to tackle and I need to get over the fear of being blown out or looking dumb. Honestly, that feeling pales in comparison to the feelings later on when I'm wondering what might have happened. The times I do open, I need to work on continuing the conversation, trying to escalate, and going for # closes at least. I have definitely shown improvement in my social skills though. A couple months ago, I would have had none of those interactions.
Also, something else I've been doing lately to help out with socializing. I've been going on chatroulette.com when I'm bored at home. I talk to anyone on there. Guys or girls, but I mostly look to talk to girls of course. I find it that it helps develop my social skills as far as keeping a conversation going. I've also managed to get a couple girls to get naked on cam for me which is kind of nice as well. From now on I'll be posting my day time interactions regardless of how short or lame I think they are.
-LeDuke
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