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Mr. Mack I do have a question it's not really a big problem (or is it?) So been with a girl for a lil while now almost five months but this is no normal relationship, we clicked right away and have spent almost every day together since the beginning. She is a pure commitment type of girl, I know for a fact I never have to worry about her thinking about some other guy or cheating or anything. We fought a lot for the first couple months mostly due to stuff like my ex being in my past and having certain friends around that I've been intimate with and have tons of history with and made a pact to have a kid in the future etc.
The fighting has now stopped since we've become official a few months ago, we both love each other enjoy each others company etc to everyone we seem like the perfect couple. The problem is when we were fighting I felt more of a rush of emotions and now I feel kinda flat as though I need to feel the pain of fighting with her (emotional not physical lol.) She does have a kid which prevents us from going out too much but then again over the years I haven't really cared or enjoyed going to clubs or bars or anything like that. So I ask what is it that's going on here we're really happy together she says I'm pretty much like out of a romance movie and we have sex A LOT so why am I not feeling anything, it did start before we met just to a different degree. I have heard of seasonal depression, could this possibly be what's affecting me cause in the summer I was far more energetic.
the good news: you are introspective and wise enough to realize this feature of your personality. and by that, i mean your tendency to crave drama.
the bad news: you are not yet emotionally or spiritually mature enough to understand "why" you have this personality feature.
let me first put your mind to rest on one thing. you don't necessarily have an affinity so for drama, so much as you might have an aversion (or anxiety) of normalcy...
normalcy with all of its implications and nuances.
take water for instance. it always takes the path of least resistance. always. to create drama, is to create an emotional spike. it also is a distraction from the realities around us. distractions can be tempting and comforting.
i've read some of what you have written on this website, you aren't a stupid dude. you seem relatively thoughtful. that is good. because it means that you can GROW emotionally and spiritually. work on that.
you are suffering from anxiety about your station in life and the path you are on. so you choose the path of least resistance, which is to create emotional spikes and distractions from the realities of normalcy.
what are you hiding from? is your path in life clear to you? are you a happy person? be truthful about this, especially with yourself.
stop taking the path of least resistance and take a path of enlightenment. remember, a woman is to be your companion on YOUR path. if you have no path, instinctively you will feel internal anxieties and uneasiness. and your subconscious mind will make things (drama, distractions, etc) manifest in your environment so you don't have to focus on what you should be and to make you feel better about your chosen path (of least resistance).
i'm being serious with this response to. because, it sounds like you've got a great girl. hell, as close to a "perfect" girl as can exist, and yet for some reason you are (what i sense to be) "uneasy" when things go smooth. that is clearly anxiety. and that is not manifesting from your relationship. that is manifesting from you.
the answer is to work on YOU.
dig deep. put the distractions aside. put the relationship aside (for a few minutes) and consider this.
you are seeking to draw energy from your environment. you are seeking happiness from an outside source. this creates imbalance. you need to BE happy and consoled internally, so that you can project energy INTO your environment.
be a lighthouse, not the darkness. and she will be drawn to you.
are you on your path?
CHAT
