HB6, Last night field report + questions



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PostPosted: Wed Oct 31, 2007 3:18 pm 
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So I have been working on an HB6; she is on the younger side and enjoys being interested in.

I worked my way up with DHV's and cocky funny, to the point where she wanted to meet up; she kept hinting at me asking her, but for some reason I wanted her to ask me first...which she did (after a week) which was risky because I could have had lost her interest or jumped into the LBJF zone quickly.

The date she asked me to ended up falling through. Awfully coincidental, but I froze her out for a day and then played the "I'm going to be silly about it, but I got butt hurt." Again, might have been another mistake because admitting her ruining my evening is a sign of DLV....however, it worked for the time being.

I got a call last night to meet up with her at a restaurant with a bunch of her female friends. I was just coming from one of my martial arts classes so I told her it would be a little. I got home, sallied up, and then met her at the place. Now comes the part that I am looking to be critiqued. I know what I have done right/and done wrong to this point, but I need another point of view for this latest portion:


I get to the restaurant - they are at a four person booth with four people; me being the fifth I had to squeeze in. I would have loved to be across from my target so I could get eye contact and maybe some under the table KINO, but I decided being pushed right up against her will give me the unintentional (in her eyes) KINO (to get her comfortable with closeness) and will allow me to keep my focus on other people and not IOI her too much.

****Question:was this bad? At this point, I have already gotten IOI's and given IOI's. To then turn it around and look mainly disinterested might have fumbled something?*******

So I start off by pulling some attention onto me - went into a partial DHV story (was a sorry story) but then also played the "exhausted, tired, and hungry so Im not going to be entertaining" skit.

******This was a good choice IMO, because then anything that I say or do that makes them laugh or enjoy themselves is going to seem like it is totally non chalant and just rolls right off of me (inserting their instant judgement of - if he is tired and this fun and funny, he will be even cooler when he is energetic).*****

I throw in a couple jokes, get some table laughs, then the topics change and I am fucking LOST. They all work at the same place so they started talking business. I couldn’t think of a story I could pull off, and I couldn’t insert anything worthwhile into the conversation....I sat there getting pushed out. One of the girls there was funny as shit; I was laughing my ass off, but the problem is I couldn’t compete with her. She drew all the attention and the HB6 didn’t really turn focus at all. By this point, 30 minutes after I got there, I got wrapped up in not knowing what to say or do that I stopped even trying to gain interest from the target.


*****Problem/Question: What does someone do when a FEMALE member of the group a target is in, is more entertaining than you? When you can't pull any of the attention to yourself....*************

So that is about how the night ended. The chick was telling stories and the entire group of girls were chit chatting about stuff I knew nothing about. I didn't want to get any KINO in besides the inadvertent stuff - the three other girls are very protective of this one.

I also felt like if I would have tried to change the subject I would be interrupting and it would look like I was trying too hard to pull focus (which then puts a lot of pressure on me; thing better be DAMN good).

End of the night came another thirty minutes later when the restaurant was closing- we all left the place together; I was saying later to them, and I was going to go for the HB6 and try to get at least 5 minutes alone...but right as I was about to talk, one of the chicks throws her arms up (the funny entertaining one) and hugs me; she talks about how she had fun, blah blah blah. Then I turn to the HB6 (target) and for some reason...which is probably the biggest oopsy of the night....I say "have fun, I gotta jet" then I gave her a fucking ONE ARMED HUG. I wanted to get some intentional KINO on her, but at that point it didn’t seem possible.


Anyway, that is what happened. I feel as though my actions earned me a quick spot in the LBJF zone. I didn't neg her, and I didn't run any stories, I didn't give her much attention, nor make any impression of myself being awesome. Does not seem like a success to me.

I am thinking about giving her the brush off for a day because she did nothing to earn my time, and gave me ZERO of hers. But then again, I didn't do anything that was entertaining to GET her time.
Maybe I should think up a good excuse instead?

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PostPosted: Wed Oct 31, 2007 5:45 pm 
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didnt read the whole thing, but i got the gist of it, so here is my two cents, first of you shot ur self in the foot by steppin into her territory, you were in a full set of girls and had to play on their terms, in a club you can always pawn the girls off to some sorry afc or better yet your wing if you got one . Your other option was to game the whole set at once, pit them against each other, cock and funny, tease them about their stories, than aggain what comes to mind is why did you go and hang out with her friends in the first place, its a bit of a step backwards, the idea here is to isolate, the only reason we approach a set is to do exactly that, so keep that in mind next time. Why did you let yourself do that in the first place, its not a big deal after you've fucked the girl cause the pressure is off. I wouldnt sweat it too much in my experiene time heals all fuck ups so if shes not responding to you because of what happened put her on the back burner and find another girl to keep ya busy (read my lay report from last night if you have any doubts). Anywho those are just a few things that jump to mind hope this helps

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PostPosted: Wed Oct 31, 2007 6:00 pm 
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Well I think my first problem, the overall problem, is that she is more of a shy type of girl that is still in the stage of "do my friends like him." She is barely out of highschool, so she still has that mentality. I felt that I needed to play off of the that; instead of trying to isolate, I wanted to build comfort. A young girl needs comfort ;)

Once she is at ease with me, that is when I get to sweep in. The trick is to keep her interested in me without getting into the LJBF zone. Is my mindset wrong?

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PostPosted: Wed Oct 31, 2007 6:10 pm 
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umm...ok i see where youre comming but you realize thats part of the problem right ? Remember LEAD.

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PostPosted: Wed Oct 31, 2007 6:18 pm 
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I love to be the leader...but (though I have) I am still learning how. I gotta go off and research more; I just dont know where to lead her from here.

(this is going to branch off into another topic all together)
How do I ask her to hang out without DLVing myself? I know that is a huge question (anyone know any posts I should read for that?) but lets just keep it specific for this one. Doing the whole "im going here, you should tag along" works great. But I think she wants a feeling of more commitment now? I don't know. She IOI's all over the place, but there is still a gap that I need to close. Not sure what it is.

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PostPosted: Wed Oct 31, 2007 6:32 pm 
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i think you're overthinking the situation, giving her way too much credit, if you wanna be really cute and romantic though try this, find out what her favorite animal is than rent a Disney movie with it, did that with Nicole, teased her about living in an igloo, mentioned penguins she thought they were cute so i ended up renting happy feet, she was floored by it, thought it was the cutest thing ever.

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PostPosted: Wed Oct 31, 2007 6:55 pm 
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haha brilliant. very smart move.

that seems to be one of my biggest problems in every situation - from martial arts, to my acrobatics, skimboarding, and now this. but I was debating whether to call her, to wait for her call...yada yada yada.

my conclusion:

text her something along the lines of how HER one armed hug last night was very personal and so passionate (in a joking manner)

i will start with that and take it from there. that will end up moving it to a direction of her to start making a decision whether to let me into the stage i want to be in.

o, and i also realized my biggest problem right now with this girl is that fact that she is pretty damn cool - I am reverting back to the guy who is trying to get a girlfriend...not a guy trying to sarge. Maybe thats good, maybe its bad. either way, it is not helping me become - i read this a little while ago - more social, more entertaining, nor better with women.

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PostPosted: Wed Oct 31, 2007 6:59 pm 
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well i don't think you should think of girls as one night stands, the whole idea is to create meaningful relationships be they sexual, friendships or commitment.

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PostPosted: Wed Oct 31, 2007 9:12 pm 
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Quote:
well i don't think you should think of girls as one night stands, the whole idea is to create meaningful relationships be they sexual, friendships or commitment.

but you are still using an arsenal of tricks and tools to manipulate the situation in your favor. Whatever the intentions may be (even to find the love of your life) your actions still are not innocent.

Besides, I am not looking for one night stands. I am truly trying to build relationships - and all or one of those things you listed. I was just saying that if I want to be successful, I need to start looking at them as less sacred.

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PostPosted: Wed Oct 31, 2007 11:40 pm 
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no not really, i dont really use any routines or canned openers, nothing i do is dishonest or sneaky, i don't follow any of that under the radar stuff either. Personally i like to keep things pretty simple, if getting laid was as complicated as some of the guys on this forum make it out to be well i think human kind would be pretty much extinct ;)

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PostPosted: Thu Nov 01, 2007 12:06 am 
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haha, you are probably right...but your opinion is different than others, as is mine. I guess we are all here for different reasons. One thing is for sure, if getting laid isn't as hard as it is made out to be, than I am probably over thinking all of this ;p

some people have it naturally; you might. I don't. I can entertain easily, but I certainly never get to take it much further. Now that I have honed into it being something someone can learn, I have turned it into a puzzle that has to be solved (something more difficult than just entertaining and being lucky enough to get laid).

I am probably going about it all wrong, but that is part of the fun in learning. Trial by error.

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