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Dating sites. Dont use them! Why? Why would you?
Because I'm not living in a major metro area with a lot of good women out on the town. A lot of professional women are being boring, staying at home during the week, and who knows where they end up on the weekend either. Crickets chirp pretty early around here on most days, whereas the online personals are open 24/7. They are a venue among venues; I'd like to have better venue options all the time, but that's not reality around here. Even with a disproportionate level of Arts representation in this town, there are only so many gallery openings in a month, only so many good women show up to them, and they only last so many hours.
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Ask yourself and be honest, how many high quality chicks are there on these sites? The real answer, not many. The high quality ones dont need to go online to online dating sites to get a date.
So what? Do you know how to find those "rather successful" women in real life? Do you know what venues they're hanging out at? If you don't, then you work with what you've got. It doesn't matter if you think "successful people" are getting laid somewhere, if you yourself don't know
where they're getting laid. Reality: professionals are busy and Life Is Hard.
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Besides that, most high quality guys dont need to go on there to get a date either. When you message a girl of any worth on there, in the back of her mind (sometimes the front) she already has you classified as a looser.
So what? Women classify nearly
everyone and everything as a "loser." That's their job, that's how their semen blocking vaginas work. Your job is to Demonstrate Higher Value. You've got tools, use them.
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In addition, the sheer number of messages they get a day is fucking nuts! No matter how awesome your message is, there is a GREAT chance it will get lost in the sea of other messages she gets.
Getting responses on POF is not my problem anymore. I added a longer photo series where I look decent + am doing lots of "fun" things with other people involved. I got rid of photos that might look bad. I worked my ad copy a lot, using my writing skills and the weapon of humor to differentiate myself from all the boring personals out there. I've got good material, good enough to get a usable number of replies from women I target. Maybe my material could be better and get me a higher conversion rate, but at present it's clearly good enough to be usable. I'm ahead of anyone who thinks they can't get noticed as a rule.
My problem is these POF gals are lazy as shit. To my 4 sentences they offer 1, like 3 days later. We're having a rapport problem. On the 2nd exchange I'll go back and look at her personal for any interests or angles that I can use, but if her personal is lazy and minimalist like so many personals, there's nothing there. I've already tried to access her interests, yep, she's just being dull. I'm wondering if rapport can even be built with a woman who's boring and lazy. My current tactic is to force the issue and get her to coffee, hoping she isn't anywhere near as dull in person as she is online. My ad already has a strong statement that "the point is to have coffee, no expectations."
Maybe that's a good qualifier for my ad right there! "Don't be dull. I don't have the patience for women who can't carry on a conversation." I'll have to think about the right way to phrase that, so it doesn't come off as "Women don't want to talk to me much on the personals." I think there's something there.
I'm also thinking of trying a pay site, on the theory that if a woman actually spends money, she is invested and actually wants to get something done. $0 = 0 commitment, no penalty for flaking. I'm not sure which site I should use though.