Quote:
Any 'PUA' worth anything should tell you what you already know I'm going to tell you:
Get Off Line And Talk To Real Women!!!
Dunno why u assume that I don't do that. I talk to a girl from work whos constantly buying me lunch (my sugar mama

) and ocassionally other girls too. And I notice its 1.) making my game better 2.) kind of a DHV for the online girl (I told her about it).
I ain't gonna do the GFTOW thing tho, cuz my goal isnt killing my oneitis but being with her (wich for now means meeting her, but if that happens it'll most likely end up being a LTR).
Talking to other girls makes me more at ease and also raises my value, as long as I tell her about it, so thats good. Gonna keep on doing that.
============
Chief, thanks for your offer of help.
But, you still up for this?
I've sent you a couple messages on MSN a while ago (yeah - finally got it set up, was busy with lotsa stuff the last few days, starting a new job, etc) but I dunno if you saw them.
I got a shitton of logs from chats with her and me, important parts bolded so one can skim over it and cherrypick the really good and bad stuff (basically I've bolded all wich isnt smalltalk but can give someone a idea of who she is and how she feels about me).
I dunno, should I send you those?
Its lots of text but they'r sorted really well.
Its insanely hard for me to judge the whole situation.
- I had attraction.
- I think I had comfort ("I trust you. I dont trust others".)
- We got sexual (she asked me how her secound time is gonna be - and thats from a really, really shy girl.).
- She told me "being in a relationship with her is fail" and I explained to her I'll make her happy and we can take things slowly, to wich she replied with "okay" - afterwards she was confused why im being so sweet to her, etc. Like she doesnt deserve it.
But its hard to tell where I screwed up or at wich point I am... qualification, comfort ? etc.
Sometimes I think she believes she aint good enough for me.
Sometimes It seems like she is just completely uninterrested in me. Maybe I overqualified her?
In the beginning I gave next to no compliments, was never especially sweet to her... then I probably showered her too much with that.
But I just can't say for sure, I lack the PU-skills to judge that.
============
What happend lately:
- had a bad fight from 25.09 to 31.09. After I've done everything I could do and basically just told her "I dunno what to say anymore, im done for. things between us are fucked up." she started to open up again, told me "everythings gonna be alright, we gonna have fun again, she knows i appreciate her and she appreciates me too - no matter what she does or says, etc"
That was the night before the start of my new job and I just could not sleep because of the fight from before - was just too frustrated and angry. And after telling her this... suddenly she stopped being cold and noncaring.
Actually I thought I was just gonna crash and burn there, I mean I know its a afc-ish thing to do, tell her I cant sleep because of our conflict, etc... to me it was my last option though, so I grasped that straw.
Just had to do everything possible to put my mind to rest so i'd get at least SOME sleep before day 1 of that new job - even risking things with her.
I have a hard time telling WHY it happend that way - but maybe she just managed to pull her shit together when it counted.
Or maybe it was that "showing some weakness" thing, wich apparently IS attractive if used in low doses?
- Next 3 days after that were really good - she always asked how my new job was, etc (and its pretty good so hey, I brought good news, plus that sugar mama girl always buying me lunch... lol).
- Weekend she wasn't really on.
I happend to kinda flip at some ingame friend of her there and she probably heard of this... wich is probably the reason why she gave me the cold shoulder after that weekend (being uncaring at first and then completely unresponsive).
- Tried to play a game with her a couple of times, wich just resulted in her leaving the server a while after I joined.
Didnt chat with her, just joined there to play together with her (ya know, since I know her over a onlinegame) - this always resulted in her going afk, or joining some other server (always the ones with the guy I've flipped at in there, to play with him - ugh.)
- Yesterday she got offline... was late already but I did still stay on for a while, then went to bed... couldnt sleep, got on again - 20 minutes later she got on again too. Asked if she couldnt sleep either, initiated some conversation about movies.
All in all that was a good thing, at least now her and me are talking again and shes not really cold / ignoring me. Though im not even nearly back at the level I used to be with her.
============
- Whats really bad SPAM:
Shes hanging out LOTS ingame with one guy. If theres AFC's and Alphas in this game, then yeah, hes alpha and a AMOG to me.
She plays ever game with this guy - she used to play lots with certain ppl in the past, but never stuck as much with one guy.
Right now shes following him around like shes his dog.
Yepp, thats the guy I flipped at - and he put my outburst into a public quote site of that game, making me look really stupid. I've logged some old flaming of him against me wich would make him look pretty bad too.
I haven't upped his flaming against me on the quotations page yet - should I? I'm just not sure if I should do it cuz right now in her eyes I have a reputation of always starting fights.
Or should I rather find a way of letting everyone see it... while still being above him and not posting it on the quotations page?
This is with someone else and not her though - but someone who has a good deal of influence on her SPAM. Though maybe I'd lessen that by making him look like a moron?
I don't think I should take crap like that. Think It'd look bad to her if I'm gonna be the guy that just takes shit from others. Really beta.
What do you think?
/E: wow fuck this is just scary... its almost like her and him are syncronized... if shes afk, hes afk. shes back, hes back.
Fuck I dont wanna have developed a oneitis for a girl in a onlinegame just for ANOTHER guy from the same game to take her away. Fuck no. I can't let that shit happen - that'd really wreck my inner game for years I think.
If someone she knows IRL would take her away... that'd be bad, but he'd obviously have a advantage. But this guy? Fuck no. Just... no. That can't happen.
To be honest if that happens... my inner game is gonna be wrecked for a long long time.
============
Chief I read your AIM conversation from ur blog - just can't link to it due to having less than 5 posts.
Anyways. Simply amazing. That'd be just the thing I'd need to do with her as shes often down. I'd like to be the guy that cheers her up, but to be honest - I'm not great at this. I have to learn this.
Latest conversation:
[05:37:26] *Me: hey... you cant sleep either?
[05:37:40] *Girl: nope
[05:37:50] *Girl: I think I'm gonna watch a movie
[05:37:52] *Me: i tried like 1 hour ago... was total fail
[05:38:13] *Girl: well i tried 2hours ago
[05:38:34] *Me: wow
[05:38:48] *Me: you laid 2 hours in your bed trying to sleep?
[05:38:55] *Girl: yup
[05:39:12] *Me: lol i know that feeling
[05:39:32] *Me: i dunno why, but sometimes i just have a awfully hard time sleeping.
[05:39:45] *Girl: yeah
[05:39:52] *Me: you got any idea why its this way for u?
[05:40:07] *Girl: no it happens regurarly
[05:40:35] *Me: you know, it was a regular thing for me too when i was younger
[05:40:48] *Me: nowadays it doesnt happen so often anymore, but sometimes it still does
[05:40:58] *Me: mostly when im thinking about too many things
[05:41:07] *Girl: i know you alrdy told me about that
[05:41:16] *Me: ah right.. true
[05:41:42] *Me: how was your week anyways? got news?
[05:42:05] *Girl: it was ok and urs?
[05:42:14] *Me: same here
[05:42:30] *Me: next work im gonna take over the work of the guy who explained everything to me lol
[05:42:56] *Me: gonna be stressful i think... gotta see if i still remember everything ^^
[05:43:11] *Me: but i think i'll do ok... im gonna take notes and all.
[05:43:23] *Me: erf, i meant: i did take notes
[05:44:33] *Girl: oh if you took notes, it's gonna be ok
[05:44:41] *Me: ya, i think so too
[05:45:09] *Me: hey i was wondering about smth... you watch alot of movies: got a favourite?
[05:45:46] *Me: if i'd have to guess, i'd say its the one with the children betting on each other ^^
[05:45:50] *Girl: hum not only one
[05:46:01] *Me: ah... but that one is in the top 10 for sure.
[05:46:26] *Girl: I've watch so many
[05:46:49] *Me: well, tell me a bit about ur latest favourite and why its ur favourite ^^
[05:46:53] *Girl: I watch at least one movie per day
[05:47:05] *Me: wow lol
[05:47:42] *Girl: last one i watched was avatar. for a long time i didn't want to watch but i finally did
[05:48:00] *Girl: I waited nothing from this so i got nicely surprised
[05:48:06] *Me: lol funny that you should mention that
[05:48:33] *Me: me and a old friend tried to meet to watch that movie... we tried and tried but didnt find a point of time that was good for both of us
[05:49:00] *Me: and now its out of the cinemas... lol
[05:49:18] *Me: he got a dvd now tho, so we gonna watch it for sure
[05:49:37] *Me: how you got surprised by it?
[05:49:46] *Girl: it's gonna be on cinema again too
[05:49:59] *Me: oh?
[05:50:07] *Me: i havent heard of that
[05:50:18] *Girl: I read that somewhere
[05:50:28] *Me: nice
[05:51:22] *Girl: the storylne is really nice for that kind of movie
[05:51:29] *Girl: even if you know what's gonna be next
[05:51:55] *Girl: the effects and images are just... I dunno it's like a magic world
[05:52:07] *Girl: and that's an ecologic movie
[05:52:12] *Girl: so you better like nature
[05:52:53] *Me: ah, i do... and as long as nature is friendly im friendly too.
[05:53:19] *Me: but that sounds really good
[05:53:49] *Me: im definitely watching it with him on dvd... and if i liked that, in 3D cinema again
[05:54:31] *Me: i dont watch quite as much movies as you do... once a week with friends and 1-2x a week without them
[05:54:52] *Me: today i watched V for Vendetta... really liked that. ^^
[05:55:15] *Girl: yeah I saw it on cinema
[05:55:22] *Girl: that's a rly good movie
[05:55:34] *Girl: I think that might be in my top 20
[05:56:05] *Me: i see you have good taste.
[05:56:09] *Me:

[05:56:19] *Me: for me it actually might be top 10
[05:56:42] *Me: i like that revoltionary kinda stuff
[05:56:49] *Girl: well all depends on the type of movie you like
[05:57:12] *Me: ofc
[05:57:28] *Me: there was another movie like that but that was about german stuff
[05:57:56] *Me: german RAF... red army fraction, terrorists in 1970's
[05:58:57] *Me: in the beginning they were pretty idealistic... later generations - not so much
[05:59:56] *Me: what i liked about that though was the idea... they fought to improve the lifes of the people, even if that was hopeless. V today put it pretty nicely... people die, ideas do not
[06:00:04] *Me: kinda like that
[06:00:41] *Girl: i've watch goodbye lenin
[06:00:50] *Girl: in german
[06:00:56] *Me: in german :O
[06:00:58] *Girl: was about german stuff too
[06:01:02] *Girl: yup
[06:01:08] *Me: i'm surprised.
[06:01:26] *Me: I thought you still knew a bit of german... but never did anything with it.
[06:01:48] *Girl: i used to understand it quite well
[06:02:17] *Me: so i can just continue to talk in german?

[06:02:32] *Girl: no that was years ago
[06:02:36] *Me: ^^
[06:02:46] *Girl: goodbye lenin is an old movie
[06:03:01] *Me: at least you'd understand something... if you speak french, idk wth u talk about lol
[06:03:16] *Me: at some point it'd be nice to learn some though
[06:03:31] *Girl: you don't need it
[06:03:51] *Me: yeah i know, but sometimes it'd be useful
[06:04:10] *Me: i dont need spanish either, but i wanna learn a bit of that too
[06:04:32] *Me: you dont need german either

[06:04:45] *Girl: I hadn't the choice
[06:04:59] *Me: ah right, secound foreign language at school.
[06:05:16] *Me: only choice was german?
[06:06:28] *Girl: spanish or german
[06:06:55] *Me: spanish is more useful, whole south america uses that (except brazil and portugese isnt that different)
[06:07:10] *Girl: that's what you think
[06:07:22] *Girl: german is more useful if you work in the industry
[06:07:55] *Me: aah, okay... more rich countrys speak german
[06:08:03] *Girl: nop
[06:08:13] *Me: then im lost.. explain lol
[06:08:13] *Girl: french got a lot of things going on with germany
[06:08:58] *Me: ya, like that fusion thing... but i cant come up with anything else SPAM.
[06:09:37] *Me: i.e. you got TGV we got ICE.... 1,2,3, fight! lol
[06:10:19] *Girl: dunno either
[06:10:29] *Girl: i'm gonna watch a movie now and go to bed
[06:10:31] *Girl: night night
[06:10:35] *Me: okeydokey
[06:10:39] *Me: gonna sleep too
[06:10:43] *Me: have a good night
[06:10:54] ** User is now offline.
[06:10:54] ** Server ** Chat geschlossen
Was ok I think, some rapport, a bit smalltalk etc... but nothing thats gonna keep her around for long. If I'll want things to warm up again, I'll have to pull some awesome stuff... like in that chatlog from Chief.
Help would be much appreciated, thanks.