| Today,wasn't a complete failure,but a hard lesson I had to learn.
...I need to do 100x more work.
Although I got countless grinds(Again,that's what I can pull off),I still missed the quota of one kiss-close.
I dont want to say women are evil(They sure as hell arent),but today,proved to me that women are fucking vicious.
One girl was into me(HB 8.5).We grinded 3 times.Near kiss-close,her friend,out of nowhere,pulls her away,and grills me.
I said fuck it.
Later:
-Ran the "Who lies more" opener just to see how many watched VH1.Nearly all of them know Mystery,and say he's a freakshow(Ignornant bitches).
-Tried to open this 3-set.AMOG comes.He's friendly,so I eject peacefully(Unless he fucks with me,I dont ruin.Respect among men comes first).
-Talk with more women.Friends pull away.
There was A CHOCKLOAD of people.Numbering 90-100.
More guys than girls.
I dont care what anyone says here.The naturals are present,and EVEN TOTAL AFCs get more than I do.Pick-up works against you in these settings.
Everyone's in a crowd,and everyone knows each other.Sure,I have people who know me(And acknowledge me),and girls who are all over me at times,but then the naturals just butt in.
Dont tell me anyting related to pick up here. It's more the fact that pure confidence and social proof WILL ALWAYS override an opener,and it's been proven today.
I am not giving up, but I am starting to realize that maybe,just maybe openers and routines are useless. I'm thiniking that the future depends on fundamentals the naturals use:Confidence,not giving a fuck,aggression,and social status.Those 4 decide the factor,and the rest are solely supplemental.
I dont have a car yet,or a job yet.(YES,those are necessary).I walk to all my parties,and try to fight off those inadequate thoughs with just telling myself "I'm a fucking soldier.I march to my potential victory.If anything happens,It is just an inch forward,and although the mile is far and wide,it can be reached".
However,saying it and feeling it are 2 different things. I feel I'm definitely getting there,but honestly, I might lose my head in the process.
I know I haven't failed, but I feel that way sometimes. I admit, I am at war with myself. My inner game was in fact solid the beginning days, but now, It's shaking. It will remain present forever, but I'm always ending up failing. I lose every game at pool. I'm clumsy doing shit. I still get disoriented. The only thing I have going for me is my IQ, my family spirit breeded in me when I was younger (Dad was Cuban army war veteran,and tank driver,and bro was star lineman for my HS,until permanent knee injury,and now does construction and is marrying an HB10.), and the mental toughness breeded in wrestling (Without it, I wouldn't be here right now).
I wish I could convey my emotions with you guys right now, but I have to do my best in text. I dont need harsh reality (I'm seeing it every moment), but I need a direction.
Why is it so fucking hard?! What do others have that I and guys like me dont? Why cant women just shut the fuck up and play along instead of finding 1000 other excuses to go away?! (Not in a negative way women readers,but come on!)
Dont tell me bring in women to serve as social proof. I dont have any female friends from HS or hometown, and the ones here have cars, and I cant give rides, cause I dont have a car (Try telling a girl to walk with you.Total DLV).
Tell me,why?
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