wow...
my GF had a small surgery in her stomach.. and i was about to loose it...
can't imagine with a heart attack...
You should - also- tell her why you acted like you did... she is probably (in addition to broken hearted) pretty fucking confused about your actions (the lack of action)..
PS
Quote:
"You know..i do feel like trust is a HUGE factor in a relationship. I could be with other girls right now, and i have been in the past...but i don't want to. ive been saving it for someone special. Adrianna, you were my first... i loved my uncle, and i love you...i cannot suffer another broken heart and shedded tears.."
There it is, you are trying to game her again.. you are trying to convey values with DHV? Looks that way... "And i have been in the past" so you are telling her you have cheated on her?--- or perhaps im misunderstanding your post...
Still.. make it big at the anniversary, i'll pray for you
Quote:
she doesn't know i lost my virginity to her. i haven't said i love her..ever. she thinks ive been with numerous women but everything in the quotes above is true. i am a playa but i don't fuck cuz i don't want to. idk...what to do? should i use the forbidden pua pattern for this?

wow.. sorry, i really need to read the whole post.. Here is a PPS..
I think you still got a chance.. loosen up a bit..
Your PUA skills didnt get her in your sack.. YOU got her inlove with you.. the pua are just tools to get into the relationship...
Perhaps you feel a bit insecure? Afraid to loose her? So you try to be 100% perfectionist with pua stuff? Like not being emotional ect?..
Loosen up mate... tell her exactly how it is, exactly how you feel about.. exactly why you didnt "seem " to care.. exactly how much you are sorry.. and how much how you just wanna be with her...

..