I'm not really sure of your question but if you are looking for suggestions I can help with that. Let's take this a piece at a time, shall we?
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As one of the occasional disadvantages with using online, is guys may often be unaware they're writing to a female with a fake profile, or if a female seems real and a guy wants to know if she's actually on a site to meet and not be an attention whore, as some women online often are, is it wise to ask women in your opening message (as well as asking it to women with have no photos up) whose profile's face and body photos, clearly show they're a HB8, 8.5, 9 or 9.5, an open ended question along the lines of 'So what made you want join the site and how have you found the site so far, since you've joined ? You don't appear as someone who'd need to use a dating site ?'.
Some women do use fake profiles that is true. I guess it is possible there are some attention seekers on the site as well. I'm not sure that this question could truly expose that intention the way you describe it. I grant you it's a good question to ask though, and women have been asking it of guys for some time.
It doesn't matter if you appear as someone who's using a dating site. You're both on there! You have no less value...
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It's avoiding being AFC, by not saying 'you're so beautiful', as other guys would do. I wouldn't make that line or any variation of it, the very first line of my opening message, but would probably put in the middle, or
at the end of an opening message. The question is qualification oriented, but it's also open ended, as answering it properly requires one to say more than 3 or 4 words. From experience, if a female answers it with as few words as possible and / or doesn't even make the effort to answer it, that and also very bad grammar and spelling, quickly tells me it's probably a fake profile created by either the site, or by a guy pretending to be a chick.
How much research have you done on this. For how long? How did you get the girl to tell you they had a fake profile? Tell us about your measurable data. Or is this just your perception/opinion?
I know you have good intention and I don't mean to give you such a hard time but the advice I give I try to back with facts. I'd really hate for someone to get a piece of bad advice and loose the girl.
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If you reckon it's unwise asking something like that until (or if) a guy meets a lady from online face to face, or that it'd be wiser to wait to ask that in a 2nd message instead if a lady responds back, please let me know.
Face to Face would be a better place to ask why she was on the site or what made her go tot he site. This way you can see the "way" she responds to you.
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Bear in mind, that unlike some guys I detest using instant messaging, where lots of questions would get asked and would say 'give me a call if you want to meet for a drink somewhere'.
Why do you detest this? It's a good way to stair step the amount of comfort being built and a good middle step from email to the phone. Sure, it's possible to skip it but there is nothing wrong with it.
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Of course a guy asking that, would have to give his own response to the question and my second question is, in justifying why a guy is using a dating site, should a guy give his answer at the same time, or wait for the lady to give her response first.
You're overthinking this. It really doesn't matter either way. You're both on the site.
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I know an opening message shouldn't have lots of questions in it and that's probably the only one I'd ask. The rest of my opening message would be tailored to what the lady has said, if a guy has anything decent to go by. If it's a stupid, boring 2 line profile, I have to go with a a scripted message .
This usually doesn't work well as many people will attest to. When you taylor to her profile you are just starting out building comfort more so because you are trying to find common ground. That's okay but the problem is most of those girls can't remember what they wrote past a few weeks.
Hell, I do this all the time and I could vaguely tell you what I wrote on my profile. When you email that stuff it looses its strategic meaning because she can't remember it most of the time. Although a good idea, it hasn't produced very good results from my own experience and others I have spoken with.
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If you reckon it's a good question, what are your best wording recommendations you've used when you've got asked why you joined and are using a dating site you're registered on, that shows you also socialise in real life, with your answer simultaneously DHVing and creating comfort, instead of coming across as a creepy nerdy keyboard jockey guy.
Woah horse! Remember you are both on the site. It's not a DLV to be on a dating site. Shit, there are millions of people on them. Almost all the girls I know are on one site or another.
There are lots of ways to respond to this but the easiest way is just to be honest. If you want to go through the lengthy process of inserting DHV spikes to value shift and create comfort then thats cool. You could say something like:
My past girlfriend told me about this site and some success she had on it. Since I am typically so busy I don't get a chance to always meet people the traditional way like a bar. Who wants that anyway? I'm sure you understand. What persuaded you to join the site?
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I realise there's some attractive women who do say in the wording of their profile, why they've joined a site, so if they do I don't bother asking, but most women are fairly lazy with writing their profile and write as little as 1 - 3 lines that don't give you anything to go by, so they don't state why they're on a site. I can understand, as more attractive HB8 - 9.5 women who are for real, may feel (and they're right) 'I'm hot, so why do I need to even bother putting a lot of thought in writing a couple short paragraphs about myself'.
That's one way to do it. Who cares why they joined. She's a girl on the site and she's there for us to meet. I typically don't care why a set has decided to go to the club I'm at, I just get the girl like usual.
Don't get too hung up on this man. It can be important but don't overthink it.