Hey gang,
What's the procedure here? Do i leave the bill on the table until she brings it up? Do i pick it up and pointedly ask, "how will you be paying?"

What if she gets moody about splitting it? Any great responses?

thanks in advance!
Bilko

Why would you wait until the last minute to ask her to split the check? That should be established before the date if you plan on doing that.

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Interesting - are you saying you don't always have them pay half? I'm just starting out but I thought its all a dominance play and footing the bill takes you down a notch. The advice was from Chase Amante if that helps.

No it shouldn't.


OP: when the check comes, play with your phone for a second. She'll look at you, expecting you to pay if she's not an independent woman.

when you look up from your phone (depending on how you like the girl, and how receptive she is) say "I'll get the tip" or look at her, grin and say "equality is real".

She'll take the hint.

I don't pay for a woman's drinks on first dates. That's earned.

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If I invite a girl out, I pay. I don't have a problem with that. Even when they offer to split, I still pay if I made the first date invite.

The dominance play is ridiculous because you're trying to interpret what a woman may be thinking about you. She may be thinking, "this cheap bastard". She may be thinking a man should pay for the date. She may be thinking, "why didn't he tell me earlier that we are splitting the check so I may be able to offer a cheaper spot." Other than, some guy said that this is a dominance play, I've never read any real psychology that says that "he's dominant" is where a woman's mind goes. I have heard women say that they were pissed off about it, called cheap, but not one of them ever said that it was a positive result. Maybe Chase Amante offered an idea on how to split the bill at the last minute instead of simply saying to split it.

The problem here is that guys are so desperate to be dominant and at the same time not lose the girl, so you want to wait until the last possible second to get her to split (or pay) instead of telling her before the date even happens that the two of you are splitting the bill.

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Why should it? Fear of her not going out with you? If she splits the bill willingly when you have to hint to her splitting it after the check comes, why wouldn't she agree to it before the date?

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I like it thanks!

Thanks Jack - here is the link I think he makes a good point which I think aligns with conventional PUA wisdom - to be different than the competition. Anyways, I totally hear you - men get paid more and should contribute more... But always paying makes this numbers game very expensive.

http://www.girlschase.com/content/should-you-pay-date
oops

Some ideas:

Eat before you go out with her and just get a soup or salad. She won't eat much more than you do. So even if you have to pay it stays cheap.

Or, when you ask her out, ask her when she wants to have dinner that night. When she answers, invite her for drinks a few hours later and ask if that gives her enough time.

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These hos ain't loyal

Dont approach, let the chick ask YOU out. Let HER go for the kiss. Let HER escalate. The competition isnt doing that.

This is the problem with the whole thing. You are reading something that says why you should do it and not how you should do it. That's why I think you're here asking the question of "how". The guys that give you the "hows" are like Arch...they want you to hint around at getting her to pay or saying it indirectly. There's no saying it directly because there is a fear of her reaction of saying, "your half of the meal is $XX.00."

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Who cares what they think? If they don't like it, they can fuck off. And certainly, if a woman acted this way towards me, I'd assume she was still getting money from her parents, a gold-digger, or emotionally weak, and right away that's a red flag and no second date.

I like strong, independent, sexually aware women who have no problem pulling out their purse.

It's hot.

I kick the all-day-wine-drinker-shopper-whiners to the curb FAST.



Why would I talk about the bill, when the date hasn't even begun? Makes no sense.

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That flies in the face of what you have said in the past. You said if a girl shows you enough enthusiasm, you'll pay on the first date. Why wouldn't making the girl who shows you enthusiasm pay make her even hotter? You're fine with girls who are on the fence or not interested in you paying and that seems like you don't have anything to lose by getting them to pay. That's a terrible standard to set for yourself.So there are no surprises or confusion. To avoid that girl that doesn't bring her wallet on dates. To eliminate that girl that is expecting a free night out. I can go on with this, but you get the point.

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It's a fluid, organic situation. No set rules.

Sure, it would.

I'm okay with surprises and confusion. That's what happens in organic situations. I'm not fearful of outcome.

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