Hi I need some advice here

I had what I thought was a pretty strong close on a girl's number the night before last,

The bars had just shut and people were congregating outside in groups smoking, I had got to the point where I could open anyone and had just used the opener, "Hi, I need to speak to you guys because of a reason that I just made up," and entered the set and people liked me. I told my friend about this and said I should field test it to make sure it wasn't a fluke. I wanted to do it two or three times before going home but with the 4 set I opened with 2 guys and 2 girls, I got pretty involved so that never happened...

I opened a girl and guy, and I noticed she was smoking hot, very attractive girl, usually I would have limiting beliefs about my ability to seduce her but I was doing so well so far I just ran with it. I had all this stoopid stuff from "the game" in my head maybe I should be talking to herfriend first to make her more interested in me (Mystery Method). I'm not saying that stuff doesn't work or anything - it definitely does, and I always try to befriend dudes before speaking to their female friends so everyone knows I'm ok, but it's a but really if your chat is good enough you don't need to play so many games. Basically these micro things I think are just taking up the slack for A) poor conversation skills B) poor confidence levels. If you are below par you can use those games to top up like a handicap.

Anyhoo our conversation is interceded by some people I met in another city nearby my hometown I lived there for three years. They stopped me saying, "Hey CS, do you remember me from that bar" I turned round to the friend thinking at first he'd taken me out the set but of course it turned out to be a net good because I was receiving spontaneous social proof (another stupid top up.) The other girl from out of town was speaking to my housemate/wing.

After a while I excused myself, I went back to the set, took the girl by the arm confidently and said, "I need to borrow you for a minute", there was a moment of whoa-k there but it was done with such finesse that it appeared perfectly acceptable. I took her out the group with an "oh ok", we stood outside the window of the closed bar, I looked her straight in they eye and said, "I would love to take you out for a drink."
Now I know she was testing me when she replied, "Really? Would you?" and I said "Yes, I would..." It took me a while to figure out exactly what I was being tested for but eventually it came clear, she wanted to make sure I was interested in her personality - not just trying to get a bang because she was good looking. Of course on another level there is the basic shit test to see if I would stay confident after being confronted.
Over all the question impressed me and raised my interest level, but allow me to go on.

She asked if I had facebook and I just automatically said, "No, I don't, but I'll take your number" without thinking about it ; I didn't want to add her on facebook like a beta male orbiter - I wanted to be man to woman. Then I realized I didn't know her name (I usually type their name in my phone and hand it to them to put their number in) and I said, "Oh now I feel really embarassed because I don't even know your name, but I liked you vibe, and I think you can tell a lot about a person by her vibe," she agreed saying something like "yeah, don't worry, I'm all about the vibe" so I this is what made me think it was a strong close because she was justifying it to me.

Now what I should have done was say, "How about Monday night?" because it was going well so I could escalate to a specific date, but instead (like an idiot) I said "I'll text you in the next day or two"

I text the night after, nothing impressive, "Hiii it's CS, did you have a good night? I had a really good time. I'm free either Monday or Tuesday night next week, away at the weekend. Have you tried out any of the bars in ----? there are some really nice ones now."
I was not in a good place when I sent it I should have wrote it in the morning when I was in a good mood but it wasn't the worst text ever either. (If I'm wrong let me know).

Now it looks like she won't be replying, I am wanting to send another text tomorrow that might get her attention and get her to get back to me I have an idea but feel free to give me your unrelated ideas if they are better as well as feedback on it.




Here is the idea, "Now name, I simply can't believe that a reliable girl like you would consider flaking on a sweet guy like me. I liked your vibe. If we get on great, if not we'll call it an early night. It's a low pressure situation."

Alternatively: "Now name, I simply can't believe that a reliable girl like you would consider flaking on a sweet guy like me. You liked my vibe. Plus I want to tell you about an amazing coincidence that happened just before I met you." (there really was an amazing coincidence am not making it up)


Ok thanks for reading look forwards to hearing all of your ideas.

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those who say it can't be done should get the fuck out the way of those doing it

Bro REALLY good job of inviting her out of the group and # closing like a boss. This is how to operate, not with all of the "group dynamic" bullshit that just wastes everyone's time.

As far as her non reply, do not send either of your texts unless you want to never see this girl again.

Hit her up early next week with something along the lines of 'fuck what a weekend!' She'll probably say "who's this". DO NOT call her out for not replying to you. Keep it light, fun and if you're a busy man you'll want to keep it brief.

Meet more women. Then you won't notice when one happens to not text you.

Another thing to keep in mind is that she may not be interested any more for one of a million reasons most if not all of them having nothing to do with you - a woman can FEEL IT in the moment with you, but then later FEELS differently. Chalk it up to the game.

Thanks for the encouragement, I may have to work on what to text. I thought I was ok at texting but really a lot of my humour relies on tone so stuff that sounds funny in my voice will just not communicate in text format it will sound weird unless the person knows me well enough to read my messages in my voice,

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those who say it can't be done should get the fuck out the way of those doing it

I now see how you intended humor in those proposed texts but if I didn't pick it up the chances are that she may not as well.

Ok supposing I'm in this situation then what do I want to say to "who's this" to give her any reason to want to continue speaking to me? I'm clearly not good at this part on a date I would be find because I'd naturally be qualifying her

I have met a few other girls got nos etc but obviously I want to try and do/learn everything I can with the lead because I liked her although I won't go crying if she doesn't respond.

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those who say it can't be done should get the fuck out the way of those doing it

What do you think of this?


Well I had a bit of a wild weekend. I went to this thing called Sacred Dearmouring. Now to be honest I thought the facilitator was a bit woo woo. She had intuitions but I think half the time she was just making them up and believing herself. But I still got some pretty big stuff out of it so either she wasn't too bad or I'm a good student. What do you think? Are you into spiritual stuff?

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those who say it can't be done should get the fuck out the way of those doing it

Avid using the word "love" early on, lol. A bit too thirsty.
I think this is a bit of Hoodoo-voodoo on your part. I wouldn't waste thoughts on this. Girls are not princesses and fragile flowers. They like it dirty.



Translation: "I just want to party and fuck, nothing serious."

Jesus christ.

"Hey XXX, this is Coper. Let's grab that drink tomorrow night at Bar X, 9."

Pay attention to using too many "?" in texts early on, it looks passive. Be a man and set a firm place and time. Asking her schedule or if she likes certain bars is passive.

You don't care if she had a good night, you just want her naked. she doesn't care if you had a really good time that night. Get to the point.


Wait until she hits you back.


This is sooooo needy and desperate. Do not send that. NEVER send texts like this to women.

Sucks! Never send anything like this.


Wait for her to text back. If you don't hear from her in a week:

"Hey XXX, this is Coper. I'm celebrating good news at Bar X tomorrow night at 9. Let's grab a drink."

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Pickup coach. PM for direct, simple coaching.

No.
Just something short and sweet.
"wild weekend!"
The end.
You'll fill her in on it when she meets you. Don't seek her approval.
Let her have lengthy text convos with her bffs. Not with you. Ideally you are busy man of action.