Hey guys, I'm new to the forum and am here in the first place because I need help with a girl.
I really am not the kind of guy that would say "no worries there are plenty of fish in the sea!"...
...Hell no, I'm not the kind of guy who wants to get hundreds of girls in one-night stands. I'm actually looking for a girl that I relate to in my life, who is beautiful, who analyzes before talking and is intelligent. There are a hundred of other subconscious things that I look for but the most important is the fact that, in the case of that girl I'll be talking about, in 18 years of living, I managed to find only her who meet these criterias and now I'm crazy in love and in no way would want to lose this opportunity.
You know that kind of girl that you would marry, have your kids with, would be next to you on your deathbed and would look straight into your eyes making you not care about what's after death, well that kind of girl.
So, now comes the problem.
That girl is going to university on June of this year and I still have one year left in college because I submitted my demand a bit too late. At a party a few weeks ago, a friend of mine told me that she talked to a guy for about an hour and this guy was actually going to the university she will go to. So, that means that I have five months left to get her heart, otherwise it'll be his.
That being said, I began reading on PUA to level up my skills, because I always struggled with my confidence and general PUA stuff because of overthinking. So I've read "The Tao Of Badass" by Joshua Pellicer, watched over ten hours of Richard La Ruina's videos and came across hundreds of PUA Forums threads. So, I understood a bit more about the science behind this.
Now, came the next step.
A friend of mine was hosting a relaxed party at his house to inaugurate his new acquisition. There was about 10 persons in that party, I actually knew most of them. So, I dressed like a gentleman (as I would naturally do) and went there with my friend.
As we stepped in the house, I saw the girl that I love, she was with a friend of hers. I looked around to find places where we could hang/relax and have a talk and actually found a few. As two of my friends (who were there) were informed of my plan to try to get that girl on that night, I texted them: "it will actually be easier than what I thought". What was cool is the fact that they actually were ready to help me whenever I would ask them to.
Now, the night began.
So, as I've learned in PUA that girls generally have more taste in regards to men who are confident, I began to talk to everyone in the room by asking random conversation-building questions that would help me create a link with people and show a confident image of me. Began to talk business related stuff with people, school with some others, DJs and production stuff with others, well, I was moving from persons to persons as time flew by. I actually did that because I've looked at the girl I love and nobody seemed to want to potentially "try himself" on her because a few of the guys already have girlfriends most others thought they were too old (she's same age as me and they are around 24-25). BUT, it didn't actually prevent them to talk to her but had no intention to build up rapport (if that's the right term).
As minutes flew by, a girl arrived (a girl that I didn't know but didn't like either) so, as a gentleman, I kissed her on both cheeks to greet her. Side note, nobody would have done that in the room except the guys around 23 and higher. NT: the girl I love actually looked at me when I did that so I thought it was a pretty good move of mine.
Now that a good hour went by, I thought it was a good time to join the conversation she was actually in. So, as she was sat at the kitchen's table with her female friend and a good male friend of mine, I joined in.
I was talking with them but deep down I was actually analyzing what kind of personality and behaviours she has so I could build up my way of approach from there. So, here are the notes that I took while talking (because different kinds, different approaches right?):
- Positive body language at all times
- Would not look at me except if I was the one talking (almost felt like she was anxious to look at me). If I would do eye contact with her, she would smile and gets back to the person who was talking.
- Express a big smile at the beginning of the conversation and a light one for the rest of the conversation except when she laughs.
- She has a lot of Anxious fidgets and generally can't hide them (feet twitching, sudden but still subtle head movements, constantly playing with her hands.)
- Attention easily gets drawn away by other people asking her stuff in the midst of a conversation between me and her.
- Laughs as soon as I say something lightly funny and express a big smile afterwards.
- Always with her female friend and always very close to her, gets very uncomfortable if she's not. (NOT KIDDING she never was alone a single time).
- Excited, very jumpy, almost too much at some points, and it's accompanied by anxious fidgets.
- Never even holded a neutral and relaxed position at least ONCE during the party. By that, I mean, always moving feet and lightly smiling never does she not.
- Holds eye contact until rupture of the conversation (as an example, if someone asks her something in the midst of the conversation)
- I learned that she actually is attracted by a guy in the room but he is not interested because he thinks he's too old.
- VERY playful, laughs a lot even if it's for rough, dark-humour stuff (because a friend of mine was keen on that lol)
Another thing I've noticed is that they don't seem to take me seriously, by that I mean that if I'm the first to talk and someone interrupts me, everyone's attention will be drawn to him and no one will listen to me, but if I interrupt someone, people will still listen to him and nobody will move its attention towards me.
GENERAL KNOWLEDGE FACTS: I've known that girl for about 6 years, I've actually met her for the first time at the first day of high school. We're good friends, but not incredibly good friends, by that I mean that we talk to each other but would not hang out one-on-one, the only time we would hang out together is if our circle of friends (around 5 persons) would organize something. For her whole high-school, she only talked to her fellow really close friends, she seemed a bit insecure and shy, but now that she's in college, it seems like she cope with her insecurity and shyness but being OVERLY extrovert (does that makes sense?). She had ONE boyfriend during her whole high school years and she wouldn't want to kiss him because she was too shy or overly concerned by everyone's views or something like that. Apparently, she had one boyfriend (or so) during her college years, in fact, only her close friends knew about that, and apparently they had sex which is surprising of her.
So here are my questions:
1) What kind of girl do you think she is and what would be the perfect approach in that case?
2) What qualities and habits should I get in order for me to have better chances?
3) In one of the last paragraphs I've written, I talked about how people looked like they didn't take me seriously, why is that? And how could I change that?
4) If she is attracted by a guy in the room, do my abilities and chances to get her diminish?
5) I thought she didn't seem comfortable, what would be the best way to make her comfortable and latched onto the conversation I'm having with her + how do I create "love" on her side?
6) She seems EXTREMELY playful but also very serious when I talk to her. She could talk about a newspaper article on racism she's writing and jokes a lot on generally immature stuff in the same sentence. So what kind of approach and conversational subjects would you recommand?
7 LAST) LAST QUESTION, if I'm talking with someone and notice that she looks at me, should I look at her for a second, smile and look back at the person I was talking to or just do like I didn't notice?
Immense thanks to everyone that will reply, you'll make a guy extremely happy.
CHAT