Hey Guys,

So as per my Tinder Lay report of my first ever Tinder Date, I arranged to see the girl again.

She suggested the Cinema as she had a bit of a cold, but I suggested we meet for coffee first and take a stroll around the city, see the christmas lights etc.

So anyway, all's good, lots of physical contact, she's hooking my arm as we walk and we're chatting away as normal.

Into the movie and I was conscious of how difficult it is to get any sort of physical contact going whilst watching the movie. However I had my hand on her leg, she had her head on my shoulder, all good stuff... She mentioned she was cold, I wrapped my jacket around her and she got more receptive.

Afterwards we continued chatting and laughing and I told her I'd drop her home, she said she would get the bus but I said it was no big deal...

Got back to hers and I mentioned that she should get the french press out as she's big into her coffee, she said she would love to invite me in but she had an early start and a cold.

I said a few germs won't put me off and kissed her, we made out for a little and then she left.

Now, the next couple days she seemed herself in text conversations, joking, sending memes, the odd bit of sexual chat.

I didn't contact her for a couple days due to being mental busy this time of year, I sent her a message a couple days back just asking how her cold was (not in that boring monotonous way).

She was short and didn't seem as warm, I told her to get a good night's sleep and left it at that.

Last night I text her to see what she was up to, she was at a comedy gig, so I said cool I'll leave you to it.

I've been making sure to really invest in myself this past few weeks, hence why I was super busy. I am gaming other women and have a date lined up for Sunday.

Just curious as to what you guys think as it has been going pretty good with this girl, I do think I may be back to my overthinking ways though?

Thanks,

Bren

Yep, seems like overthinking.

Why don't you invite her out again if you wish to see her? Or even better invite her in, cook something together @ your place.
Promise some warm soup for that cold.

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Hey R.C,

That's what I thought, I'm trying to stay as grounded as possible with this stuff, like I said I've got another date arranged for Sunday.

I'm free Monday night, so just gonna text saying Dinner Monday, straight to the point and see what I get.

Thanks,

Bren

I'm not necessarily a fan of brute force approaches. Not saying it can't work, just that if a brute force "Dinner Monday" will yield a yes, a fun little convo prior to that will always lead to the same yes.

However, that can't be said the other way around.

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My in depth texting & dating guide.
There's no such thing as shit-tests.
How to keep a girl.

Of course, I don't mean it straight out of the blue with nothing prior, but I still want to be definite on what I'm portraying. As in, definitive plans, not 'wishy washy' 'what do you think', 'what would you like to do', indecision.

Definitely think I need to be careful of my text game, which has been good lately but I went back through the messages and found myself not being as concise as I was with initial contact.

Need to nip that in the bud now.

Thanks R.C.

Be sexual and flirty and fun in your messages, your OP seemed to drone a bit.

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Heywood,

Yeah I know what you mean, but I see some posts where guys don't lay out the real facts!

Text game is something I've been working on, so I can find myself going back through messages where I've been great and then regressed.

Just need to be more aware.

Thanks

is this your way of trying to convince us that you weren't at all coming across as needy despite everything other sign, and the mere fact that you're making this post suggests otherwise?

A few germs won't hurt? So you make out with a girl that has a cold, risk getting sick, and you didn't get the lay? Some of you guys put the ego boost you get from pussy on too high of a pedestal. Im first.. I'd rather been alive, healthy and happy, than have a new lay under my belt.

Nothing about this would suggest that you have any real standard, that you're at all challenging, or interesting despite how busy you try and make yourself seem. All in all though man; thats the world of online dating for you; its flakey, up and down. Theres no swipes coming at you everyday. Whenever I would deal with girls from online I would have them delete their profile on the app after the first phone conversation if they were interested in meeting up. Thats me getting investment before I put forth effort; the investment I know I'm worth and unwilling to compromise.

Let this one go man. Maybe it'll come back on its own, maybe it won't, but you'll already be on the next thing smoking by the time it does.

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Hey Eddie,

Genuinely, I've been really busy! This time of year in general, work, getting to the gym (actually entered a development Olympic Lifting comp) like I've been saying in recent posts I've just been trying to grab life by the balls more and try new things!

I've had 2 lays in the last couple weeks from just being out as well as this girl and another date lined up for Sunday!

I am trying to be more aware of what I'm portraying and if you have a quick scan of the lay report I feel 100 times better for the advice I've gotten on here and taking it straight to a date was amazing!

To be honest I think I was just overthinking it all, she popped me a message an hour ago so I'll just keep doing what got me so far and be fun and tease!

Love that comment about making them delete their profile though!

Eddie I appreciate your comments, you were the first to offer me some great advice when I started and I needed the harsh lesson, even just physically escalating more has made a massive difference.

Bren

Why the romantic date?

Boring. Cinema dates are not a good idea. She probably lost her energy during the film, and just wanted to crash.

Do you think she would've preferred a walk down Romantic Lane and a boring movie, or a couple drinks and your head between her legs? Better yet, what would you have preferred? You are the MAN. You are the leader. You lead the evening. Women crave men who do this. You did not want Xmas lights or a movie. You wanted sex. You do not need to "trick" women into having sex. They want it, too. You don't need to "soften them up". What you need to do is be honest, direct, and be congruent with your needs.

It's winter here in the northern states. You grab a drink, then you hop under the blankets and fuck until the wee hours, lol. That's how it's done.


Enough with the fucking coffee, man.

Why even mention germs? WTF, lol. That's hot....



Dude...she was probably over the cold days ago. You bringing it up is weird. And you don't care about her cold, you want her in your bed.
Don't contact her for three days. Then send this text:

"Hey crazy, I'm watching a movie tonight at my place, you're welcome to join".


just get to the point and stop being such a nice guy pussy.

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Arch,

She wanted to do something "more together with no drinking" I assumed it was just a reaction to fucking on the first date.

That's why I suggested coffee first so it wasn't simply a Cinema date which I know is horrible, I felt that by grabbing something first then taking a walk around it would give me more opportunities for kino, which it did.

She was really quite affectionate during the movie which surprised me as like you said it's easy to just slump there.

The germ thing was a total brain fart!

Bringing up the cold was boring I agree, and having looked through my previous messages that's not the kind of boring shit that got me the date and the lay on the date!

Like I was saying to R.C. need to be more aware of what I'm texting and get to the fucking point.

That was my thinking, wait a couple days and get to the point.

Thanks Arch

Don't get me wrong, paying attention to her needs (the cold) is good if you're exclusive with her or you know she loves you.

But not this early on...it's overbearing.

Either way the situation doesn't sound too bad after your clarification. Sounds like she is trying to "de-slut" to impress you or clear her conscience. I've seen it many times.

You have to get on that horse again, and while fucking her, tell her that sex makes you feel close to a woman, and that you would never judge her in the bedroom, ever.

This usually solves it, and frees her conscience, permitting more sex, and dirtier sex.

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Arch,

Yeah I totally agree with you and I felt that.

That's exactly what I thought so I tried to compromise on the date and get my suggestion involved, didn't want it to seem like all her idea.

Funny you say that, she mentioned to me that "You always want to be in control, maybe you should relinquish that some time"

She seems extremely open and like you said that needs to be brought out in a way that makes her feel secure.

Thanks