I met this girl at a party last Saturday. Sexy...intelligent, great dancer and really laid back..Very independent. Get the number...we go out Tuesday later and I think we have a great time..Shes laughing...and a lot seems to go right and I am actually into her... We continue to talk and Thursday I try to get a second date set up for next week and she says," I think I have plans next week but if I am in town, I am definitely down." So I leave it alone but in my head, im thinking if she really was into to me, we would want to go.

So the next day, I am teasing here about how I can beat her ass in pool and she says,"Find me a pool table and we can settle this." Cool... I pick the place and the day and she says,"We shall see.." At this point am confused as fuck but I say to myself fuck it.Im just going to back off a little.

Yesterday, I am just taking my time responding to her text.... Being a little short and brief here and there, and she seems to kind of do the same thing.. If I text her an hour later, she does the same thing...if I text her 2 hours later, she will do the same thing. So I start teasing her about the pool game we get the point where we start to a make a wager and this morning we have come to a playful agreement on terms and what she wins if I do lose..

In complete honesty, I would text a little bit quicker when and maybe I was coming off a little needy or aggressive.. Im still new to all this somewhat and this girl is a little better than the rest and I keep having to remind myself to treat them all the same.. So I guess I am looking for some thoughts or maybe even some ideas from you guys. If I let out any details I apologize and I can provide more if you need them..

Thank You

Let's go back to this momentBesides laughing, what makes you think that she's having a great time with you as a date? I made a guy laugh when I ordered a breakfast sandwich this morning but that doesn't mean that he wants to be my friend now.

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Sounds like you're doing fine. Maybe tone down the text game. No need to wait 2 hours to reply. 5 minutes is good. If ALL of her texts take 2 hours to respond, then ask why she takes forever. If you get a bullshit excuse...then....that's another topic.

Wait...what? This girl will not commit to meeting up with him. How does this sound fine to you? From everything that he's described, she's showing polite disinterest.
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I hope this doesnt come off wrong.. It felt like if I would have said anything to her that night, it would been funny but that is the vibe I got.

I felt the same way but why would she now agree to meet me to play pool and meet me? Even go along with the wager etc... Im just confused but I was thinking the same thing as well.

Contrary to popular belief here...some girls DO have plans already. And she lives out of town. I wouldn't call it quits after 1 week. Unless you're on a mission to bang 3 girls a week.

Laughter is a good sign if you want to read it that way. However, if there is no intimate contact or even an attempt at it, and the girl is as attractive as you say, for her, it's not necessarily a good date.Polite girls will do this. They'll agree that you guys should get together and do something that you've talked about but never commit to a date. To them, they feel like they are being nice and sparing your feelings.

I'm not saying that it's not in the realm of possibility that she is actually planning on going out with you to play pool. It's her actions that make me question her real motivations. Most girls that want to go out with you will free themselves up from plans that they have in the next five minutes if you asked them to go out right now. Her not even offering you a hint at a day that's good for her cast a serious doubt about how serious she is about a second date.

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It's a nice statement, but you didn't answer my question.Girls that DO have plans already provide alternatives, especially after a first date.

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Do not follow the advice in bold, lol. You'll wind up in the Stage 5 Clinger file and never hear from her again.

I wouldn't even do this with my girlfriend of 10 months. So needy.

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So wait...you didn't go for the kiss on the first date? If not, you just friend-zoned yourself.


She thinks? She's on the fence, obviously. Women like you described have no time for men who fail to lead on the first date. She has high value and knows what she wants, and she expects a man to as well. Women like this are dying for a man to have their way with them in the bedroom. She's probably more "alpha" than most men, and more emotionally centered.


You are texting her in the morning? Why? You are a grown man with things to do. You don't have time to text women in the morning and afternoon.

You're in a weak position right now. Stop the useless chit chat over text immediately. Cease all mentions of the lame pool game. The girl doesn't want to play fucking pool, and neither do you. The "pool game" has become your Mr. Nice Guy code word for hiding your real intentions: sex.

Wait two days, and send her this text:

You: Hey, I'm renting a movie tomorrow night at my place. You're welcome to join.


That's it. she knows exactly what this means. It also shows leadership, which you failed to provide so far. If she shows up, make a move when she puts her purse down.

If she blows you off, ignore her and game other women.

But like you said, this woman is better than others you have been with. And because of that, you are going to have show discipline and leadership early on. 9/10 women absolutely love it when men get to the fucking point. And inviting her over for a movie and not a pool game (my God man, why all the texts about a dumb pool game?) is exactly that.

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you didn't escalate ...did you??

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I didnt. So what does that mean for the second outing? I'm assuming I need to do something different lol?

Did you not read the advice we gave?

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Tomorrow at 630..I am picking her up and from there I'll do my best. I appreciate the advice everyone.