Lol dammit Yillan you depress the hell outta me. Oh well, to each his own.

_________________
afc-challenge-to-the-masters-social-anx ... 10108.html

Any way I can practice conversations at home? Like being quick without having the think of something to say?

Mystery once said that to be interesting you have to mention a lot of interestig fact, when you can deliver lots of interesting facts, the material stops being interesting, and you start being interesting.

I have improved my "interestingness" (:lol: I've invented a new word!!!), by watching videos of the MM, and comedy.

Also read a lot of things you think a girl would find interesting, I dont saying you should read cosmo and start talking about designer shoes. Body language, ESP, Cold reading and that crap. Chick crack I belive is called. Use that.

Also pay attention to the gestures people do when talking to each other, and wacht for the effects of it.

Wish you luck dude, this thread had a lot of controversy going, we all learn from that.

I swear were exactly the same like ill can be around one person and im funny and interesting but like if two more people join the group my mind just does not what to think of something. What ive been doing is just saying anything just to get me talking like literay anything. I know what you mean about head arguments

I'm just going to talk about me and it will probably answer questions. From k-3rd grade i was the kid who was chasing the girls around the play gound. I had lots of friends girls and boys. My first girl friend was in 1st grade; ok i know she wasn't a girl friend because i didn't like girls till around the middle of second grade. But we did bf and gf things without the sexual stuff cus we weren't old enough to know bout that stuff. We held hands talked smiled she always waited for me at lunch stuff like that. I was also the tough kid. I had so many meets with the principle she took me out to lunch. I'm not kidding i had lunch with my principle. Well in third grade I beat the shit out of another kid and had so many bad things behind me they put me in an anger management program. One year later ended in July one month before the beginning of 5th grade. And I was a total pussy-A man regarded as weak, timid, or unmanly. They had turned my tough Alpha male self into a very polite timid AFC. The kind of guy that can't say no and feels bad about taking up any space. In that first month of 5th grade I had lost all my old friends made many enemies and started to eat more and more. A new kid came in the middle of 5th grade, I could tell he was at the bottom of the food chain. Well he was above the kids in the special class but I knew that he would get beat up if he started talking to the wrong people. Sure enough that day at lunch he talked to the baddest kid in school. I watched as Trent put on his nice act so that he could use the poor kid. I felt sorry for the new kid who i did not know the name of at the time. The next day in class i went up and asked him if he had made friends with Trent. He got a frown on his face and his eyes swelled up with tears as he chocked out my game boy he took my game boy. I asked you tell on him. Yes Michele said. I replied, that was a very bad idea did you get it back. He barley got his next words out, n-n-no h- e s-a- sa-id he di-n't t-ak-e i - it. I knew what they had did talked him into using it for the night and Michele being the kid who doesn't get friends much handed it over in the hope of making some friends. He was my only friend till 7th grade. 7th grade I was such a pussy AFC I was also a big fat teddy bear weighing 250 that i tried buying girls stuff because I wanted them to like me and i thought thats what you did to get girls if you were not a hot tough guy. I got Tooled by about half the hot girls in the school. I bought them lunch desserts candy movies tickets anything that i could. That whole year I was trying to get friends and lost the one I had and didn't make a single real friend. After my mom lost her good paying job I couldn't buy girls all that stuff and they left me. I only made out with one of them and she wasn't even that hot maybe a 7. I got really depressed and my mom decided that we would move to the city so she could get a good job and i could start fresh. That summer I took off about 75 pounds. I went to a middle school in the city and it wasn't as big as the 7-12th grade small town high school i was in. I won't go into much detail of that year. I didn't talk to any one till my 3rd day there. That year i only had one person that i hanged out with once out side of school. I was so AFC The girl that became a one-i-tis that i really liked let me sit at her table because one of her friends felt sorry for me which i didn't find out till 9th grade. 9th grade came I made some more in school friends only hanged out with one person once for the first semester. I changed schools to a small hippy waldorf school. I went there the rest of ninth grade and found some hot girls that said they wanted to play video games with me. We never did because I was really shy which I told them. I Went to partys tho lots of the kids there just thought i was high all the time and thats why I didn't talked. The summer after 9th grade I got a job lost some more weight from biking 15 miles round trip to work and back. Then I went back to my old high school because I didn't like smoking pot and drinking a lot. When I went back I just hanged out with one of my sisters friends brother who I knew cus my sis thought me and him would get along. We did and he had some cool friends way more than I had since 3rd grade. Then a few months ago i stumbled apon The Game by Style after reading the first and second chapter I searched Mystery on the internet and found his show and got all the episodes. I watched those and finished the game. Found this site and started posting. Then I got some more of Mystery movies and stuff. I tried some of it and just barley could open a set. I would loose them because my inner game sucked. I would just open get enough of there attention so they would stay and hear me try to make a good conversation but I kept failing because I would get really nervous and stop using real PUA tactics get scared crash and burn go home and give up for a week or two and try again. Its been 6th months since I read the game. About two weeks ago I just decided PUA material wasn't for me. I started an ADHD drug Adderal XR. A week before I gave up on PUA material. About a day after I gave up on Pick up me and my doctor found the right dose of Adderal. It helps me think really good without getting distracted and stuff. That week I just started noticing sets and stuff even tho i wasn't even thinking about gaming the stuff that pick up teaches just started glowing. I started realizing that the most popular kids in school would talk about the same thing to all there friends. I noticed that I use to be that Alpha male till they turned me into a pussy AFC. If your an Alpha male you think like this; entertain me or I don't give a fuck about you. You annoy me I leave. Alpha males don't care what people think. There loud take up space and want whats best for them. The third day on the right dose of my ADHD meds I started thinking like that. I noticed when my friends pissed me off. I noticed that I have lots to talk about and started talking more in one day than I use to in a week. That night I read and watched some videos. I noticed I was talking about one thing for to long. I would go on and on about one thing. People like to change from interesting subject 1 to interesting subject 2. I decided that I didn't care if I have friends. That I don't really need a girlfriend and I have all the time in the world to find friends I want to hang out with. I use to just try to hang out with people that look cool. I changed my thoughts tho to an alpha male. I started talking to people I saw in the hall. Tease the shy girl that looks away. Say hi to every one that holds eye contact for a comfortable amount of time. Make a quick comment about how a jocks hair cut kinda looks like Elvis Presley's hair. At the end of the first week on Adderal I had people waving at me just because I made just one small thoughtless comment. Weekend came some girl that wasn't hot but hangs with lots of HB found my myspace and sent me a friends request. I denied it and messaged her saying that its impolite to do that with out asking me for my myspace. She said that she never had time and sorry. I messaged back saying well stop me in the hall next time you see me if your not to scared and ask. That Monday her and her HB friends ran up to me I looked all of them made eye contact and said I don't like posies. They giggled. I smiled then said hey this isn't fair I can't take on all 5 of you. They all giggled again. I looked at the one that myspaced me and said its easy to come up to me with a group, your cheating you gotta come up to me alone and ask. They all giggled except her. I looked at the rest and said its nice of you to try to help her but shes gotta do this on her own. I've gotta go my friend has some of my stuff in his locker. I turned around and walked off. I did the same hello to people who made eye contact and wave at people that waved at me now. Even getting people who wanted to high five me. Well only one guy i just put my knuckles out for him. I did get a lot of those low hand slaps kinda like a hand shake but not really. That night I thought about all of those girls coming up to me. If I was my old self I would have took off and run away . I can't even think of keeping my cool in front of 4 hb's. I thought about what they did. It was like they were trying to attack me because I showed them I was an Alpha on myspace and they wanted to see if I could handle it. I'm not really sure what they were thinking maybe they were just trying to get my myspace. The next day one of the Hbs came up to me and asked your Kasa right. No I don't go by Kasa. Ya but i feel I'm at a disadvantage. I smile. Why she asks. You know my name and have probably read my whole myspace page. She giggled. Tell me your name and I won't hold that against you. Emily my friends call me Ema. Really I'll call you Ema, she smiles. I have to go did you want anything. No she ses. I leave and go to the nearest friend remembering that that could make some social proof. Well long story short All of them except the original girl who asked me is on my myspace. She never got the guts to ask me alone. I talk to lots of people now. If I get board I leave. If I get asked why I say I was board. I try to be the main person talking now cus I bring up good conversations. I'm getting better at threading. I can start a thread break it start new one break it start new one break it finish old one break it finish another break it start new one you get the point. I'm trying really hard to improve my body posture and movement. I have to make sure I'm not whaling my arms all over the place which I will do if I forget to remember not to. The point is. This stuff works. You have to weave it into your life. I use to think I had nothing to talk about just like you and every other guy that is an AFC. Get drugs from doctor if you need help. I'm still trying to calm my nervousness. I just think better and different now because the ADHD drugs allow me to think in a more organized order. This can cause you to talk about the same thing for way to long but you just gotta remember to cut routines. I know ADHD is just a label but nothing was wrong with me. Its like when they use to thing left handed people were disabled. But we that are labeled with ADD or ADHD some times need them to fit into the normal social world. The choice is yours. You don't need girlfriends but its nice to have one. Remember to think about your self. No I'm not like self centered but I now allow my self to not be completely self less. I think about me I'm first in my life.

_________________
If you fully understand the mind and how it works for you and others, life isn't any better.


Even the best have questions.

I think one of the crucial things to remember about introversion vs. extroversion is not that one supposedly talks more than the other. These categories describe where people draw their energy from. Introverted people mainly draw their energy from time alone to center themselves. Extroverted people draw energy from being around other people. Myself, if I spend too much time alone, then I become lethargic and sullen. If I simply put myself out in a social situation my energy level shoots up. This doesn't mean that I don't need time alone any more than it means that an introvert doesn't need to be around other people.

Now, the whole idea of not having much to say is something else entirely. I would suggest that this might be an issue of self-confidence. I'm wondering if you ever have instances where you do have lots of things to say. Are there people who you always have engaging conversations with? Is there a situation that always brings out that desire in you to contribute and interact? That's all talking is, adding your particular personality variables to a situation. It's daunting to think that everything we say has to be magnetic and make men worship us and women worship a certain part of us. Don't psych yourself out.

Try this idea that I took from Hypnotica. Make up a story to tell someone. Make it as outlandish as possible. Tell a story about Humpy Dumpty when he was a child and his mom hardboiled him. It doesn't matter, but just have one story that you are ready to tell lots of people. Then go out to the mall, Central Market, wherever for an hour and tell 10 people your silly little story. Do it over and over again, and don't stress about the people who ignore you. Just get used to talking to people. Get used to words coming out of your mouth. You'll find that once you get over your social anxiety you start to have fun with it. That it becomes a game. You may even realize that you have other things you'd rather say to these people than the story.

The goal isn't to change yourself from an "introvert" into an "extrovert." That characteristic is who you are. It's about being comfortable enough with yourself to simply talk to people.