A big part of my problem with women is that I get needy with them because I don't have enough to do with my time.

Currently, I am between jobs, and spend most of the day alone.

In the past, I would go to Alcoholics Anonymous meetings, even though I no longer needed to, just to have a group of people to talk to. Ever seen Fight Club, when Tyler goes to a support group meetings for problems he doesn't even have?

Today, I went to the first meeting at a Toastmasters club and enjoyed it.

Are there any other national organizations that have regular meetings, that can keep the social muscles moving when there is nothing else to do?

Theres a MeetUp.com for all of your standard group meet up needs.

However,

You don't just get needy with women because you don't have anything better to do; thats only a part of it. You're getting needy with women because you haven't found contentment with yourself. It's quite possible that you're still looking for a woman to "Complete You" or "make you happy". Until you realize that no woman, or no person period has the ability to make you happy. People can give us moments, but true happiness is discovered within ourselves only. Leaning on women or "needing" them is what produces neediness. Groups will help, but what you're truly looking for doesn't lay outside of yourself. Who are you? What are you good at? What do you want to do while you're living here? When you find a lane in which to exist that you're passionate about you'll be a lot more satisfied with your life whether you have a woman or not.

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Thanks, Eddie. Good to have you here.

Well, there's a couple of lanes, actually.

The first is finance, investing and trading.

I like researching how to trade stocks, bonds, commodities and currencies.

I've been doing it since October 2014 and it always gets better and better the further I dig into it. Let me back up and say that my life savings wouldn't buy me much more than a car, but I have fun trading it.

In two years I've come further with this hobby than some people do in their entire lives.

Then, my other passion is photography.

The problem is that women don't really understand the first passion. It's hard to explain to them, but some of them get it ... they say "is that like stocks or something?"... I say "yeah, right"... and then they're like "well you should pursue that then!"

The thing with photography is that it involves so much interaction with other people that it tends to help me meet people more easily than the finance hobby.

But the truth is, I'd probably rather be huddled alone reading about finance, most of the time, I just don't think women understand.

Do you think women really appreciate introvert hobbies where the guy just sits by himself, reads and looks at graphs all day long?

Ever notice that guys whose "lane" is in the arts tend to do better with women than guys whose "lane" is in math or science?

I'm conflicted in this way...

Another issue is that trading and finance was really fun for me until I found out how much I still don't know... I may be good for a hobbyist, but at a professional level, I'm nothing. I went to a conference for quantitative finance in May this year,

This is probably the deepest level of study in finance and I was like "what the fuck is this shit!?".. but I understood a tiny fraction of it and some people gave me some help on where to start with it.

So, now, it's like my hobby is now a burden, because I'm at the top of the game as a hobbyist but on the lowest rung of the ladder at the pro level.

I've lost the part of me that just liked to have fun with it and I've started to compare myself to other people.

Why are you bringing women into your hobbies? Whatever you do in your free time is time for you, your personal growth, self-investment. If there's a cute girl you run into during your hobby, sure, pick her up, but your hobbies are yours alone and you should be doing them for you, not for women.

If you like finance, do it. If a girl comments on it, banter with her. "Are those like stocks or something?" "Yeah, you'd look so hot in stockings." That's just the kind of stuff I'd say, as it is in line with my personality, but your conversations don't even have to make sense, you just need to amuse yourself and have fun with it.

Tease her, challenge her, give value, have fun, make her laugh.

It may also help to handle the job search first. Nothing wrong with putting women a lower priority for a while.

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These hos ain't loyal

Just do things at once. Keep your toatsmasters things going. You don't have to go all in or you will burn yourself out. I personally have many hobbies I want to do. I can realistically do some of them because I do still need downtime to ferment my creativity. Toastmasters club is great. Keep that for now. Like Dj said, i'd focus on getting some sort of stable income because money does buy things. Don't neglect your other areas because it will come back to bite you in the ass. Focus on what you can fix now and worry about other shit later.

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Thanks guys.

I'm trying to take on too much at once, right now.

I need to set priorities and focus on staying centered.

Maybe this isn't the best time to focus on meeting women.

Yeah man, I wrote a post on it

pua-lounge/the-importance-patience-this ... his%20game

You will be fine man. Embrace the dry spell but keep those feet shuffling!

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I read the post. It was helpful. It's kind of a good feeling just to go out and enjoy whatever else is going on without feeling bad.

"For christ sakes I even went out 3 times each of those weeks and I went home alone 9 times with my hand on my dick."
^^
This is kind of funny. There's only 7 days in a week, so are you saying you went home with your hand on your dick multiple times per day?

I went out three times each those weeks. So 9 nights I failed until I finally started getting somewhere

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