I got my ex back...and then I didn't want her.



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PostPosted: Fri Sep 02, 2016 6:06 am 
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Well, that's not entirely true.

But this is the template for how it's done when you've ruined attraction by acting emotionally uncentered, which I did with this beautiful woman 2 years ago. After a couple months she dumped me and went back to her old boyfriend. Here's why:

1. Too much texting.
2. Too much sharing of feelings over text.
3. Not acting like a man, really.

She was really attracted to me, but I killed it. I did end up fucking her four months later, but became uncentered again and quickly was ditched.

So, I completely stopped contacting her. I'd show up at her work once a month with a date.

That's it.

Two years later. Two years....I get this text last night out of the blue:

"I still love you, Arch".

So I met up with her (you all know her as the bartender I posted about before, the onieitis one who I couldn't quite grasp).

She asked if I loved my current gf. I told her I did. She told me how bad she fucked up, and that she wanted me back more than anything.

I told her I couldn't, and hugged her goodbye, and she kissed me.

I'm very happy with my current gf, but I'm not going to lie, all the sparks were still there. The girl's touch electrifies me. Sucks, but it's life. I'm not going to dick over my current gf for a girl who blew me off, however gorgeous she may be.

the moral of the story is, MOVE ON. Go about your life. Look and be happy. Find a good girl.

They always come back, man.

Always.

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PostPosted: Fri Sep 02, 2016 6:22 am 
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I'm going to play devil's advocate here.

How can you be sure it wasn't the fact that you gave her the attention that she was craving? The attention that her exboyfriend that she went back to wasn't giving her. Perhaps, she came back because of you being open with her. From what you explained, this girl was talking to the the "relationship Arch" that she knew, missed, and loved. Not the current one that puts on the hardened exterior.

It's possibly a case of the 80/20 rule. You had the 20% that she was looking for.

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PostPosted: Fri Sep 02, 2016 6:25 am 
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You let her kiss you on the lips? If yes, what would your current GF think of that? I wouldn't have replied to her text "2 years later." I have some old romances that were steamy, but these girls ceased to exist in my mind after I was in an LTR with my now wife.

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PostPosted: Fri Sep 02, 2016 7:22 am 
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She went in for a fast kiss, did meet my lips, and I pulled away.

I admire your strength in your LTR. I held my own in this situation, but it was not easy. This woman (I hate to say it) is the sexiest I have ever seen in my life.

She is a cross between a porn star and a 50's starlet, very thin, feminine, long hair, huge eyes. Like an alien, lol.

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PostPosted: Fri Sep 02, 2016 7:24 am 
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Quote:
It's possibly a case of the 80/20 rule. You had the 20% that she was looking for.

It's possible. I really wanted to fuck her last night, but did not. I still have very strong feelings for her and it annoys me.

I live in a town with 70,000 people. She is the only woman that makes me completely zone out when I see her face.

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PostPosted: Fri Sep 02, 2016 9:18 pm 
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Quote:
I'm going to play devil's advocate here.

How can you be sure it wasn't the fact that you gave her the attention that she was craving? The attention that her exboyfriend that she went back to wasn't giving her. Perhaps, she came back because of you being open with her. From what you explained, this girl was talking to the the "relationship Arch" that she knew, missed, and loved. Not the current one that puts on the hardened exterior.

It's possibly a case of the 80/20 rule. You had the 20% that she was looking for.
Or she missed the 80% before he changed and started giving her the 20%.

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PostPosted: Fri Sep 02, 2016 9:29 pm 
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If your current girl wasn't in the picture, you'd have been all over that like a chinese kid on white rice.


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PostPosted: Fri Sep 02, 2016 9:54 pm 
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If your current girl wasn't in the picture, you'd have been all over that like a chinese kid on white rice.
Absolutely true.

Just her fingers touching my wrist is electric. Annoying, lol.

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PostPosted: Fri Sep 02, 2016 9:56 pm 
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Quote:
Quote:
If your current girl wasn't in the picture, you'd have been all over that like a chinese kid on white rice.
Absolutely true.

Just her fingers touching my wrist is electric. Annoying, lol.
I know the feeling. My ex has that affect on me, too bad she's a complete psycho.


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PostPosted: Fri Sep 02, 2016 10:28 pm 
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I know the feeling. This woman was actually in SPAM. And my current gf gets these weird angry episodes.

It just seems to be a thing with really beautiful women. They got put through the ringer of creepy people growing up.

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PostPosted: Fri Sep 02, 2016 10:29 pm 
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Was it her looks that got you?

Who is prettier, your current girl or her?


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PostPosted: Fri Sep 02, 2016 10:40 pm 
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Quote:
Was it her looks that got you?
Her eyes and her hair. Kills me. Long, straight, dark all the way down her back, and huge alien eyes. When her hair is in a pony tail it's as long as a horse's tail. Very feminine. When you go to the mall, you see a lot of obese women in cargo pants/shorts with chopped hair. They all look masculine. This is a feminine woman and she knows it and flaunts it.


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Who is prettier, your current girl or her?
My current gf is the same type: thin, feminine hair, big eyes, good cheekbones. But she's a touch less bright and when I look into her eyes I'm not electrified like the bartender. However, when we're playing around or fucking, her facial expressions are hotter than the bartender's (beautiful smile, etc).

Both women make you shake your head when they walk away from the bed. It's that long hair, and thin feminine backside that does it for me.

Both are also ravenously bi. I've thought about trying to arrange something, but my current gf hates her. Both are feminine women outside of the bedroom, and will do *anything* in the bedroom. Both are squirters (lol).

It's a tough spot to be in, haha. But yeah, venting here about it helps for sure. I want to be a good man. I'm not going to cheat, and won't.

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PostPosted: Sat Sep 03, 2016 12:09 am 
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Quote:
Quote:
Was it her looks that got you?
Her eyes and her hair. Kills me. Long, straight, dark all the way down her back, and huge alien eyes. When her hair is in a pony tail it's as long as a horse's tail. Very feminine. When you go to the mall, you see a lot of obese women in cargo pants/shorts with chopped hair. They all look masculine. This is a feminine woman and she knows it and flaunts it.


Quote:
Who is prettier, your current girl or her?
My current gf is the same type: thin, feminine hair, big eyes, good cheekbones. But she's a touch less bright and when I look into her eyes I'm not electrified like the bartender. However, when we're playing around or fucking, her facial expressions are hotter than the bartender's (beautiful smile, etc).

Both women make you shake your head when they walk away from the bed. It's that long hair, and thin feminine backside that does it for me.

Both are also ravenously bi. I've thought about trying to arrange something, but my current gf hates her. Both are feminine women outside of the bedroom, and will do *anything* in the bedroom. Both are squirters (lol).

It's a tough spot to be in, haha. But yeah, venting here about it helps for sure. I want to be a good man. I'm not going to cheat, and won't.
Well, that's interesting. Femininity, that's a big hit with the men.
I too enjoy admiring feminine women, but ones that are actually naturally pretty, but not average to below average struggling to look even pretty.
But I'm too lazy to be one.

I used to be very feminine in my early 20s. But with the years, maybe the long schooling has something to do with it, I just don't give a crap anymore.

If I wear dresses, for example, they are feminine but modest. My hair's short and don't plan on growing it long. Should-length hair is my idea of 'long hair'. Forget eyes shadows and lipstick. And long painted nails. Nah, too much work.

But perhaps I do this because I know I get away with it all the time. Even in hoodies and sweatpants, men still ask me out.


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PostPosted: Sat Sep 03, 2016 12:19 am 
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To give you a contrast.

Super feminine dress, and 150% of men will love it.

Image

This is my idea of feminine and 'sexy'. Yeah, I'm sure all of you will pick the first.
Image


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PostPosted: Sat Sep 03, 2016 12:38 am 
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Those pics are not my thing, really.

She looks exactly like this model/actress in her Tron role (does the same hairstyle, too, similar long, elegant neck, great jawline, big eyes and cheekbones), but with dark hair:

Image

She told me the other night that I "torture her" by coming into her work. Well, she has no idea what she does to me. It's awful, lol. I actually sought out this forum because she was the only woman to have an uncentering effect on me.

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