a while ago n2thevoid said something like "you need to fall in love with yourself. do whatever the fuck you want. go on the street and take off your shirt. chase a chicken down the lane"

a few days after that advice, I went to a club where there is loud music and people dance. I dont know how to dance and I have a fear of looking retarded while dancing. I listened to n2thevoid's advice and just danced like a retard. did a lot of weird moves, like I am exercising instead of dancing. most people didn't appear to care. the ones who were staring, I told them in my head "fuck you, at least I have the balls to do this, you dont"

That night my mindset changed.
For the first time, I realized I would be ok if I ended up alone.
For the first time, I realized nobody gives a FUCK about me or what I do.
I didn't feel inferior to other guys any more.
When a girl rejected me, for the first time I sincerely believed "her loss" and "she missed getting to know a great guy" I even asked 2 girls to dance and they said no and it didn't hurt, I sincerely believed "her loss"

I used to hate Vitaly for having 9 million youtube subscribers ("I hope he fails"), but for the first time I looked up to him and admired him for what he has done and wished I was like him.
When I approached a girl, for the first time I believed there is a possibility that she will be attracted to me. before, I did not see any reason why she would be.
For the first time, I started seeing beauty in disorder and uncertainty. I always hated disorder and liked structure.

this was temporary. now I am back to my old self, I hate Vitaly, I hope he fails, I don't see any reason why someone would be attracted to me, I am depressed for not having a girlfriend, I hate uncertainty and lack of structure.

n2thevoid, I think I need to fall in myself first before I can be successful with girls. I mean how can you love someone else if you don't love yourself? I think it's impossible. It's like an empty cup trying to fill up another cup, it's not possible.

the point of this post: I am trying to provide information regarding what seems to be working so you can adjust your plans for me accordingly.

Loll...

_________________
In a funk? Read this

pua-lounge/the-importance-patience-this ... his%20game

You complain about not having permanent improvements yet you refuse to implement long-term solutions that would give you said permanent improvements.

The solution to most of our problems is to do the things we most do not want to do. Successful men make a daily habit of doing stuff that scares them.

Hit the fucking gym
I dare you to respond to this with another retarded-ass excuse. Just try me bruh

Chief dropping bombs!

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Never get broken up with again: the-addiction-formula-never-get-broken- ... 88794.html

Bart, it sounds like you've had a real transformative experience.

Maybe it was the bottom-down approach you took (experience>integration) rather than trying to integrate things simply through theory and painting your interactions with a cynical lens. Whatever works. It certainly got you out of your comfort zone and you didn't explode - you've built a new (and empowering) reference point. Keep at it as it sounds like you've figured out the way forward.

Well, he's doing it now evidently.

Bart,

I'm not going to make crappy little jokes like most men on here do.

I've met guys like you Bart. Maybe not 100%, but similarly. And I feel for you.

One time, I took a one-hour train ride to meet up a guy. As soon as I saw him, my compass needle went haywire. 0 attraction.

He was so happy to see me. I didn't turn around.

I went out to dinner with him, had a great conversation, and on the second day, told him I wasn't interested.
He persisted for several weeks, because I was nice, picked up his calls, and well, he was a genuinely nice person to talk to and be around with. But I was 100% clear.

I enjoyed our friendship while it lasted. He completely cut me off later on, but I do wish we had remained friends.

Maybe he did learn something from our encounter. Maybe he learned to approach women with more ease. (He did eventually get his first girlfriend).

Maybe that's how you should start. Aim for hellos, how are yous, small friendships, before you aim for the big guns. For some guys it takes that.

If a girl wants you as a friend (and actually wants to maintain the friendship), don't take it as a failure. There was something genuine she saw in you. Most women say let's just say friends but don't really mean it. But if she does, learn from that.

If you could rationally point out three things that immediately caused you to lose attraction, what would they be? Behaviors, looks, etc?

My guess is that he was just your stereotypical "nice" guy.

Looks. His online picture was one thing, in person he was another.

I see, and what exactly about his looks caused an immediate loss in attraction for you? Was he obese? Short? Dressed horribly?

His face, he looked more attractive online, and he was short. But years later on, I got a huge crush on a short man (the crush developed over the course of a month, with me initially not liking him).

It's common for women to look past a guy's appearance, provided he's not ass ugly, if he has other nice attributes such as a cool persona etc. I have many female friends I've witnessed this with where initially they were meh or on the fence attraction wise and then a few weeks or month later they were feeling a pretty strong level of attraction for him.

Yeah, there's a good list in a survey I have around that lists that "beneath the surface" characteristics that women find attractive.

On the flip-side, lots of good looking guys scare off women with crappy personality traits, etc.

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Likes attract likes. All comments are geared towards generating lasting attraction for the purpose of a relationship with a well-rounded female (attractive, well educated and cultured, plus knows what she wants in her work and personal life).

Out of curiosity, how short do you think he was, HT23VWY67?

Autoregressive, if possible, can you post a link to the survey?

Fascinating stuff.

Uhm, 5 Ft. 5 in.? Something just didn't click with him. He was overly nice, he did have confidence but not like a sexual type of confidence.