My experience has always been bad with these type of relationships. I have found that whenever I am 'lenient' with the guy as far as dating finances go or what I want from the relationship, he ends up acting like an ass. Sex or no sex.
The last guy I had a fling with, ended up blowing me off twice. I did not ask for expensive dates, let alone drinks, but all I wanted was respect. If we set up a 'sex date', please don't blow me off and give me a lame excuse 2 hours later.

BUT, if I demand a proper date, a potential relationship, men start to act different. Not saying all, but most show me respect, their time and effort.

So, really, these casual relationships turn sour for me and I end up feeling used. At least for me, I've come to the conclusion that if I want to be treated with respect and dignity, I have to set my standards and demands high. Men don't appreciate nice girls, it seems.

you can't go and change the parameters of a relationship without some resistance. So if the relationship just started off as a sexual relationship, the guy is going to expect it to be that way from that point on. If he wasn't paying for dates originally, why should he start paying for things now? Instead of demanding for him to pay for dates, just meet up with him and not have sex. That way he will reveal what he really wants without the ultimatum from you. Once he asks what's wrong, you can state your case and then it's his option instead of your demand.

_________________
mpuaforum.proboards.com

This is what I was getting at. I DID NOT demand him paying for dates. If there was a 'date', I paid my share.
I know the limits of a fling. And all I demanded at the time was RESPECT. Instead, I got blown off. Example: we agreed that on this day at this hour, I'd show up at his place. Well, I show up, nobody answers. 2 hours later, oops, he forgot.

Jack, my whole point is, when I'd start splitting things, or going out of my way for the guy, all of a sudden, I wasn't given respect.

To respond to the original question:

Yes, it is overrated. It plays a role, but where a lot of guys lose it is in thinking they have to reach a much higher threshold. In reality, just like looks, status is more about avoiding bad impressions than creating several good ones.

_________________
These hos ain't loyal

Don't get defensive. I'm actually on your side. I'm just responding by the way that I read it.

_________________
mpuaforum.proboards.com

Lots of men harp on me about expecting men to pay for dates and all. But when I did try to split, be nice, considerate, lenient, whatever, I was like not valued or something. Like, oh, it's okay to blow her off, it's okay to be cheap with her, it's okay to be rude.....but then the bitches that didn't get them the time of day, oh, those women were golden. Men find women hard to figure out, and I'm not disagreeing. But I've had my fair share of men that walked over me for being too 'understanding'.

Now you understand the 90% of men who are paying.

However, you got good advice from Jack. How about not having sex with the guy? A majority of the time, the guy will show you what he wants. If he disappears after that, you got your answer, he just wanted to hit it and that's it.

_________________
In a funk? Read this

pua-lounge/the-importance-patience-this ... his%20game

Yes, I know. I was saying that, I went in and told the man this is strictly sex. But all I wanted was respect instead of getting blown off. We'd agree on a day and hour, I'd show up, and no answer. Then 2 hours later, oh sorry. Or send a text and never get a response.

Men can be just as difficult as women at times. Assholes abound.

Alright. Then that's because that guy is a dick for that. I'll agree. But now where we disagree is that if it's strictly sex then who cares about the dates and shit ?

_________________
In a funk? Read this

pua-lounge/the-importance-patience-this ... his%20game

You should not care. But I did like that movie Le Divorce. Sex, dinners and a Hermes handbag? I'm in.

That's legalized prostitution.

_________________
In a funk? Read this

pua-lounge/the-importance-patience-this ... his%20game

Oh come on, let a girl dream for once.

Why are you even on this forum?

_________________
THIS USER HAS BEEN BANNED

The men in her life don't listen to her or respect her, so she comes to a place full of men, and offers "advice" to feel more important/relevant.

_________________
I would chop my dick off and move to the forest. you know, since yesterday my opinion changed. - bartm
A chick can have an ugly to average face but if she's skinny, that's a guaranteed 6. - HT23VWY67

Yea it's kind of stupid. I think we should kick her out for being a girl.

Is she even hot?

_________________
THIS USER HAS BEEN BANNED