| I have been reading up on situational awareness and have been wondering how I have been able to detect bullshit so easily and how I could tell a bad person from a good one in my life. Based on intuition and smarts. You don't need some navy seal training, just understand your situation and your circumstances.
Growing up in a rough neighborhood it all came down to body language and what you project to the world could either mean you were easy prey or you were someone not to be messed with. People cannot tell if you're weak if your body is projecting something else. I remember I was 12 and I was walking the usual route but noticed a couple of kids on a stoop who got quiet all of a sudden to me approaching. One shouted pussy at me but I did not react, I just kept on walking. Did they come after me ? No, they didn't know what I was capable of, even though on the inside I was nervous as shit. Just one example. And that wasn't the only time that kinda shit happened it happened a handful of other times. But I was always in a relaxed but attentive state, ready to go into the next level of focus and finally execution of a plan. In seduction it's best to anticipate your girl, if it goes wrong what will you do ? I have ingrained this so well that if I get rejected a kiss, I just smirk it off and try again later. If I get last minute resistance before sex, I have been there done that and visualized it before it has even happened, once again, I am focused and ready to execute my plan to plow through.
This was made even more apparent when I visited Toronto for the first time last week. I was in a new area but fuck approach anxiety. I needed to know where things were and I wasn't going to look like some tourist. I asked questions and made note of landmarks. I was in the present and I eventually walked like I was from Toronto.
Now how does this apply to seduction ?
In a bar or anywhere really, to stay in the present be aware of what is going on. Screw what other RSD buddies or whatever wishy washy game you have to play to stay in the present. Play a better practical game, a game where you observe the area and remember faces and body language and most of all exits. If you're prepared for anything, your date will seem like a breeze. Now don't look like a fool and be looking around like crazy. Be suave about it, look at interesting objects but taking in key details about the establishment. If you focus on what's in front of you, including your date. You will be better off in the end. She will appreciate your attentiveness and focus on her and to what is happening to your surroundings. Some pickupd advice actually tells you one good way is to use a situational opener with a woman and to be honest, this works very well on top of what I have been saying to keep your eyes peeled. If you sense the conversation is dying, just use your surroundings, easy.
This helps put you at ease and her at ease. One crucial part of my game is my ability to calm others down. If you're calm, other people will be calm. It's contagious as hell.
Just because you're having fun doesn't mean you should let your guard down...especially if you are going to travel to other places that you are unfamiliar with.
Watch a bartender make your drink, if you put your drink down pay attention to it, or order a new one if you happen to lose track of it. You just never know. if you are getting too intoxicated take note of it and slow down. Little things like these help you keep you in the present and not in your head.
1. Note all exits in the establishment you are entering. (you never know when shit may occur)
I have had a few instances where an argument between two other patrons escalated in proximity to me and a girl. I had to maneuver my date or the girl I was talking to away from that to prevent her from potentially getting bumped into or hurt.
2. Meet in public places. Especially online dating.....You never know who your date is. Even as a man, don't let your guard down. This is why advocating meeting in a public establishment or somewhere where there are people around is ideal for your comfort and hers. Now sometimes you can go to their houses for a one night stand, but same shit, know what neighborhood you are entering and memorize streetnames and addresses just in case your online date turns out to be some nutcase/dude. You guys may be rolling your eyes at common sense but you have seen the questions being asked here, common sense isn't that common these days.
Take note of the people around you. What are they wearing ? Skin color, race , hair color, weight etc. Are they out of place with what they are wearing ? Like a big coat on a hot day ? You never know when shit might happen, even if it's unlikely. This will help you train your mind to stay in the present.
Now back to your date, once you get the hang of this you will be able to elicit one attractive quality, the protection of others. I have naturally put myself in between me and my date if I sense that she could potentially get hurt, my date once said "youre protective" and you're damn right I am. That's one way you can show your lady you care about her. Just be a gentleman about it and laugh.
Now this isn't to get you paranoid, this is to actually do the opposite, you will be commanding presence. This was a rough draft of my thoughts for the day, but I felt like this is one effective way I keep myself in the present.
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CHAT
Mostly hitting the gym and trying to get in better shape now, still struggling to find time to actually go out. Still chickening out when I do.