When men do ask this, is this mostly serious? Or trying to get into her pants and then ditching? Or both?

For those of you that are just about the pickup and sex, have you ever asked a woman this? And if so, for what reason?

When a guy asks a girl to be his girlfriend he usually likes her looks/personality and wants her to be exclusive so no guys can have her. Usually though its the girl asking the guy to be in a commited relationship and this is in my opinion how it should be.

But to answer your question not all guys are in line, some guys like to be exclusive because they see long term potential perhaps even marriage and some just like to fuck the girl for a few months and then breaks up and on to the next. These guys are sad in my opinion as they "use" girls which can really fuck them up so think twice when entering a relationship, dont do it for the sex and then run but only when you see a future with the girl.

my 2 cents.

_________________
Do not make external things like girls define your happiness or you will live a harsh life. Keep doing what you love and keep improving as a man.

This is the woman's job, IMHO. Especially today's 20-something. You can ask a 6-7 38 year old woman to be your bf a week in and she probably won't have an issue. Do this to a 20-something 9-10 with a million options and she's going to think you're needy.

Focus on being charming, teasing her, fun dates, giving her orgasms and being emotionally centered. Eventually she'll try to get you exclusively.

I've been just about the pickup and sex...and then you find a girl in that spree who completely fucking blows you away. They are not all the same, my friend. This is when you play it cool, keep your emotions in check and focus on what I said above. You keep a woman by making her orgasm, not being controlling/needy, and by being fun.

_________________
Pickup coach. PM for direct, simple coaching.

Lots of guys will lie about the girlfriend or seeking relationships to get into their pants. That is why players get a bad rap.


I have never and will never ask a girl to be my girlfriend just so I can have some sex. I'd rather blow myself out than become a liar.

I usually get propositioned by the girl to become her boyfriend.

_________________
In a funk? Read this

pua-lounge/the-importance-patience-this ... his%20game

I dont think I have asked a girl to be my gf since maybe the 8th grade. I just let the relationship evolve organically without feeling the need to place labels on it. Eventually it gets to the point where its pretty obvious what it is and what we mean to eachother.

_________________
Never get broken up with again: the-addiction-formula-never-get-broken- ... 88794.html

That said I still want to see other people!

Thanks guys!

I really find it interesting how many said that it's the girl that usually asks this, or it's her job, etc. Is it because you don't feel confident enough to? Or that's from your past experiences?

And for my case, I was the one being asked, never asked a man though.

Because if the woman isn't ready, there is no way we can logically convince her to become our girlfriends. It has nothing to do with confidence. I can ask any girl to be my girlfriend but that doesn't mean she was ready at that time. Women make decisions on emotions. So as a player, I let those emotions guide her. I let the woman do the deciding on a relationship because her emotions are telling her that "yup this is the guy I want" and boom she wants to have the talk or tries to solidify the relationship. Just the way it works.

_________________
In a funk? Read this

pua-lounge/the-importance-patience-this ... his%20game

Is it the same guy with spaghetti and water? How old are you guys btw if you don't mind us asking.

The argument also works if you interchange men and women in your reply, so I wouldn't take that as the reason. Except if you consider that a man is ready for a relationship at any time (which is obviously not the case).

Rather I'd say, men have less issues than women with hooking up and having fuck buddies. From what I read in Kimmel's "Guyland" (which, I grant you, only describes the reality of white college students), in hookups guys mostly seek sex, while girls mostly seek a relationship. And I guess this behavior extends, by force of habit, after college.

But I don't think it's any gender's job to initiate the Talk. Even more so that asking someone to be your bf/gf is actually a pretty cowardly behavior: you leave it to the other person the burden of deciding for the two of you. In other words a way to say "I love you, now go ahead and build something with that." I'm pretty sure there's an alternative way of building a relationship without asking, but also with being more explicit than a silent "organic grow-out" like Warped Mindless said.

_________________
We do what we have to do in order to do what we want to do.

This.

Also who the fuck asks that question just to get in someone's pants? That's absolute cringe.
If you are thinking about exclusivity yet don't have enough confidence to put it out there, you're doing something seriously wrong.

As Warped suggested, and as I said a million times before on this forum, a relationship is not something you agree upon and then start building. A relationship is something your evolve into and then simply acknowledge later.

Why I personally let the women initiate that conversation? because I always find it funny how they try beating around the bush and fishing for that info. But again, when she does, it should be pretty obvious where we stand so it's just a formality.

_________________
I know my place. It's me on top of the world.

My in depth texting & dating guide.
There's no such thing as shit-tests.
How to keep a girl.

Bingo. Men who understand women get this. You cannot convince logically an attractive(key fucking word) woman to commit to you, no matter how confident you are.




Pretty much.

_________________
Pickup coach. PM for direct, simple coaching.

LOL, no.

Everyone above has it covered.

I don't recall anyone beyond the age of 15 to ask someone to be his girlfriend. That is high school stuff. Since in your other post you mentioned you are at a drinking age at a bar (assuming you are from US), that will make you at least 21. I 'll put you somewhere in the range of 21-23. Now the guy obviously wants to be with you exclusive and he doesn't really have much of experience with dating because if you do you don't need to ask this question. It evolves naturally. Did you guys sleep together yet?

At some point between 1-2 months of having sex it is more common for one of the two (usually the woman) to give hints or directly ask where it is going and talk about exclusivity especially if she feels that the guy has options and could be dating other people at the same time.

But no. Asking "to be girlfriend", it is a school thing.

I'm 29. The man that asked was, I believe, 33? And no, not the spaghetti man. Come on now, we all do school things once in a while.