Hello,
My question is simple. Is it better to give you number to the girl or ask for hers. My dilemma is that if I giver her my number it wouldnt feel too pushy to her but at the same time limits my chances in getting a response from her. On the other hand getting her number would mean me having the upper hand but at the same time it would be a fake number (I was once actually given a number of an escort service once!).

Thanks for your responses guys!

always get

for this get the number, but I've never been much of a numbers getting type of guy, and I'll explain why, with some options I believe to be better with higher success rates.

With numbers, there's to many factors going against you(not always depends on you) you didn't build attraction or comfort enough, so she loses interest. you get a fake, the list goes on. The rate of flaking with numbers is high(not in all cases) in most cases


For one I like to close(speed seduction) and reach endgame a.s.a.p, I believe more in instant dates, the success rate to reaching endgame in the shortest amount of time is higher.

Other avenues to get the meet up again that work better than numbers now are social media platforms like snapchat, and facebook. These give you more ways to demonstrate higher value, and you can just say, I'll message you.

Getting a number is always my last option, and to be honest I rarely even go that route, I'll just go right into another approach and pick-up over asking for a number, unless it's a circumstance where she is really awesome and she wants to meet me again but has to go back to work(on her lunch break) or something of this sort.

its kinda like a coin flip: just Like the above brethren said.


but in the end it comes down to interest levels, so it might work either way. another look at the situation is that some women dont want to be seen as the aggressors

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I went through a phase of not chasing women. I.E. giving them my number etc. It's a great frame to abide by...

Have, to be honest, it was not at all fruitful for me, at all. I got way more results by taking the lead and asking. This is with Western culture btw.

Living in Asia at the moment and I feel the game is in reverse here. If a girl is not making a solid effort to chase me, I am likely to forget about her. But the ones that suggest meeting up, I'm more likely to get the meet up with me.

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How about you both exchange numbers, since with a cell phone that's easy?

She gives you her # and you immediately call her. What's the big deal?

1) You figure out right away if the # is real

2) She needs to put your name into her phone (and you can spell it for her, if it's a tricky one) so she'll know it's you calling/texting later.

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I think the point is...A guy double checks if it's a real number and the name is mutually inputted correctly simply conveys a bit of neediness.

If you were Brad Pitt , you would not do this crap. You'd just give her your number and be on your way. Let her chase. I know celebs are a bad example. But I am just using it as an example of someone who would chase simply due to the value and not have to need to chase because you know your value.

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None of this is explicitly being said to her. If you made a positive impression on her, all this little crap is irrelevant.

Neediness is one of these things that has no standard definition as far as I can tell - here or anywhere.

If neediness is seeking her approval - then speak for yourself.

I would ensure a proper exchange of information so I don't have to waste my time later wondering if she made a mistake giving her # (by accident or on purpose). Period.

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Who said anything about saying anything needy related? I am saying is that it CONVEYS neediness. Girls are intuitive so it is relevant.

I remember there was a thread made recently about a guy saying to a girl that he doesn't want her number if she is going to be flakey. I guess logically it makes sense that he is willing to give his number if only she replies, but the bottom line is...He is conveying neediness by just having to ask her that

You've missed my point completly though.

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Yeah, you've lost me, between your reference to some other thread and my suggestion to properly exchange contact information.

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Oh dear god

I can tell you're going to be trouble around here. You won't last 3 months trying to prove something like they all try to do.

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Is this Americas Ninja Warrior Contest(tv show) How many obstacle courses do you have to go through to get a number lmao.

I'm gonna write a ''Solid Snake Metal Gear Solid Guide To Getting Girls Numbers'' inside joke not cereal.

The real question is! Why are you asking for the number?
If its just for the sake of getting a number then by all means number away.

But for the sake it's for the reason most people are referring to and using a number for. Then there are things you must do and have established with the women, like connection, attraction, etc. For the number to even serve a purpose.

I mean are you the guy, shes going and telling her friends about how she just met you today, and is waiting on your call.

Or are you just another guy asking for a number.

Never give out your number. If she doesn't wanna give you hers please don't be delusional thinking she'll ever contact you.

Read my guide (link's in the sig). More on the topic there and I'm too lazy to reiterate.

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You mean I'm going to point out obvious BS and overthinking little things which don't mean anything?

And applaud stuff that makes sense and is more important - such as gameshine's post below?
Indeed, after you actually attract her, the specific process of getting her number is irrelevant.

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Of course you can. Except many guys do it in a way that gives off a needy vibe. I like R.C.'s approach better -- repeat the number back to her and intentionally mix up two digits. If she corrects you, you're good.