unblocked...how do I get her back?



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PostPosted: Sun Jun 12, 2016 1:25 pm 
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ok, I was seeing this girl, everything great, few weeks later she leaves me for some unfinished business with an ex. she had previously dumped him for cheating on her.

I handled the break up well enough, I have been no contact since (2 months). as soon as she left me (we were only dating/fucking, not really in a relationship at that point) she blocked me on facebook and SPAM even though i was making no attempts to contact her.

anyway the other day I noticed on SPAM she had randomly unblocked me, her status was changed that day to something like 'its a brave smile when the heart is crying' so I assume she and he guy have broken up, or had a fall out.


I know you guys will say forget her, but she was actually the first girl in about 4 years ive met that I could actually see some potential long term with. she seemed pretty into me until the ex came back.

my question is, whats my play here? its been 3 days since she unblocked me, (still blocked on facebook) she has made no attempts to contact me.

do I continue no contact and just wait for if/when she contacts me? Or shall I send her a message or some sort?

my concern about staying N/C is that some other guy may swoop in first?


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PostPosted: Sun Jun 12, 2016 3:06 pm 
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I know that this is not answering your question, but there is a bit of information needed before you can get a good answer. She was fucking you and decided the guy who treated her like shit was the better option, but you see a long term potential with her. How can you see that in a woman that isn't willing to put you as her first option?

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PostPosted: Sun Jun 12, 2016 3:19 pm 
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Yup! You see im caught in two minds here. One is the obvious one like you said. She left a good guy to go to a cheater, why should i be someones 2nd choice. I get that.

But on the flip side, we were actually really good together, and in another life if the ex wasnt there we would probably still be together.

I get that going back to an ex, there was a time years ago when i was AFC and hung up on an ex, i would of left anyone to get back with her, for validation and closure mainly. So i understand it and i can see its not as black and white as some people seem to suggest online.

Lets assume i had another chance, it would be a risk but one i would be willing to take, because the payoff seems worth it.

I just need to find out if i have another chance and im not sure if no contact or contact is the way to find that out


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PostPosted: Sun Jun 12, 2016 3:54 pm 
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Yup! You see im caught in two minds here. One is the obvious one like you said. She left a good guy to go to a cheater, why should i be someones 2nd choice. I get that.

But on the flip side, we were actually really good together, and in another life if the ex wasnt there we would probably still be together.

I get that going back to an ex, there was a time years ago when i was AFC and hung up on an ex, i would of left anyone to get back with her, for validation and closure mainly. So i understand it and i can see its not as black and white as some people seem to suggest online.

Lets assume i had another chance, it would be a risk but one i would be willing to take, because the payoff seems worth it.

I just need to find out if i have another chance and im not sure if no contact or contact is the way to find that out
Without beating around the bush too much...I get that you want a tactic to get this girl and you won't hear anything but that. If she unblocked you with the purpose of allowing you a way to contact her, then it's her just baiting a hook. You can't take the bait. You need her to come after you so she can invest instead of being the guy that is nothing more than a rebound.

OP, you need to be smarter. Pick women that don't have such a big red flag.

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PostPosted: Sun Jun 12, 2016 4:31 pm 
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Quote:
Quote:
Yup! You see im caught in two minds here. One is the obvious one like you said. She left a good guy to go to a cheater, why should i be someones 2nd choice. I get that.

But on the flip side, we were actually really good together, and in another life if the ex wasnt there we would probably still be together.

I get that going back to an ex, there was a time years ago when i was AFC and hung up on an ex, i would of left anyone to get back with her, for validation and closure mainly. So i understand it and i can see its not as black and white as some people seem to suggest online.

Lets assume i had another chance, it would be a risk but one i would be willing to take, because the payoff seems worth it.

I just need to find out if i have another chance and im not sure if no contact or contact is the way to find that out
Without beating around the bush too much...I get that you want a tactic to get this girl and you won't hear anything but that. If she unblocked you with the purpose of allowing you a way to contact her, then it's her just baiting a hook. You can't take the bait. You need her to come after you so she can invest instead of being the guy that is nothing more than a rebound.

OP, you need to be smarter. Pick women that don't have such a big red flag.
thanks for the replys, ive decided against reaching out, if she wants me she can come an get me.


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PostPosted: Sun Jun 12, 2016 5:58 pm 
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only smart and right thing to do is move on and forget that cheating bitch,she has what she gives,that is cheating boyfriend,fuck that,dont be a dormat,and what potential,to cheat on you


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PostPosted: Sun Jun 12, 2016 6:13 pm 
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I know you guys will say forget her, but she was actually the first girl in about 4 years ive met that I could actually see some potential long term with...
I often read sentences like this on this forum. It pretty much means you are looking for the advice that you want to hear, instead of REAL advice on what you SHOULD do.

She treats you like a door mat and you are STILL interested in her??? Do you not have any pride in yourself?

This pickup stuff embraces abundance regarding women, this is so important but you evidently haven't grasped that. Stop trying to change people. Accept the fact that you have oneitis for a girl that treats you like that white substance you get at the side of the mouth when you're thirsty.

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PostPosted: Sun Jun 12, 2016 6:15 pm 
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Quote:
Quote:
I know you guys will say forget her, but she was actually the first girl in about 4 years ive met that I could actually see some potential long term with...
I often read sentences like this on this forum. It pretty much means you are looking for the advice that you want to hear, instead of REAL advice on what you SHOULD do.

She treats you like a door mat and you are STILL interested in her??? Do you not have any pride in yourself?

This pickup stuff embraces abundance regarding women, this is so important but you evidently haven't grasped that. Stop trying to change people. Accept the fact that you have oneitis for a girl that treats you like that white substance you get at the side of the mouth when you're thirsty.
Amen

especially about the mouth jizz part


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PostPosted: Sun Jun 12, 2016 7:21 pm 
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How are you guys meeting 1 good woman in 4 years?


Is no one approaching women?!


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PostPosted: Sun Jun 12, 2016 7:30 pm 
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How are you guys meeting 1 good woman in 4 years?


Is no one approaching women?!
Easy. They live through a scarcity lens. The 1st woman that comes along who is equally desperate enough, they settle for and cling-onto for dear life.


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PostPosted: Mon Jun 13, 2016 7:10 pm 
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How are you guys meeting 1 good woman in 4 years?


Is no one approaching women?!

Was asking myself the same question haha

That's why guys make a elephant out of things like these.

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PostPosted: Mon Jun 13, 2016 9:48 pm 
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Oneitis isn't real. If she moved away to Europe you would finally rationalize to yourself to move on. Pretend she moved. Block her. Unfollow her. Get another girl who won't dump you for D bags the first chance they get. If you know we were going tell you to move on, why ask the question. Right now you are scared to lose her because she is the source of validation that you get. The only attention you get is from her. Train yourself to focus on yourself. Only person you should be pampering is yourself. These girls don't owe you shit.





Have some self respect.

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PostPosted: Tue Jun 14, 2016 8:20 pm 
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She'll contact you eventually.

The fact that you noticed doesn't make you look too good. Thats not the move you want to make. But I aside from that, I strongly think you should reconsider getting serious thoughts about a girl who left you to return to a cheating ex, then blocked you(for no reason. Probably because he said so) and then only unblocked you because he probably broke up with her. Now you're just going to return to her and save the day? How could she ever respect you? You'll let her do what she wants and then run back to you when she's done? No wonder she left you for this guy. And she'll probably do it again if he comes back so long as you have this attitude.


You have to grow beyond your emotions man. Who cares about how you feel. Sacrifice temporary emotions to retain your dignity. Its your fault that she's the first girl in a while you could see something serious with. How often have you been actively bettering yourself and approaching women to find one high enough in quality that you could see a relationship with? How often? Thats your fault. Don't settle because you don't do what you had to do to improve your quality of life. Make the sacrifice and do it now.

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PostPosted: Wed Jun 15, 2016 9:43 pm 
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Quote:
She'll contact you eventually.

The fact that you noticed doesn't make you look too good. Thats not the move you want to make. But I aside from that, I strongly think you should reconsider getting serious thoughts about a girl who left you to return to a cheating ex, then blocked you(for no reason. Probably because he said so) and then only unblocked you because he probably broke up with her. Now you're just going to return to her and save the day? How could she ever respect you? You'll let her do what she wants and then run back to you when she's done? No wonder she left you for this guy. And she'll probably do it again if he comes back so long as you have this attitude.


You have to grow beyond your emotions man. Who cares about how you feel. Sacrifice temporary emotions to retain your dignity. Its your fault that she's the first girl in a while you could see something serious with. How often have you been actively bettering yourself and approaching women to find one high enough in quality that you could see a relationship with? How often? Thats your fault. Don't settle because you don't do what you had to do to improve your quality of life. Make the sacrifice and do it now.
damn nicely spoken sir! This should be in the site banner.

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PostPosted: Thu Jun 16, 2016 8:35 am 
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Quote:
How are you guys meeting 1 good woman in 4 years?


Is no one approaching women?!
How do they call a woman that ditches them for their ex "good"?

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