She did want to meet up.

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i was trying to set up another date but she forced me to explain what happened. it took a while but finally i had no other chance then telling her roughly, what was going on and she understood and was sorry. in fact she claimed it was bad coincidence and it seemed more or less creditable. we didn't meet since she was already gone for the holidays and she said it was a pitty we hadn't met before cause she was all mixed up again. we were hardcore text flirting again and when she returned we had a real good start. i told her to hit me up, when she was free and she did in the beginning of the week.

finally we managed to set up a date on friday. again we were disturbed by a common friend. our friend called her and wanted to meet up, but she told her she had already made plans with me. the friend kept asking what we were up for and if she could join and even called me and asked if i was ok with it. i'm not sure if it's all made up, or if it was bad coincidence again.

we ended up hangin out at her place playing games, me, her, our friend and another girl. we had an all flirty evening. whenever i'd use suggestive indications (like "deep inside") she'd be the only one to respond giggling and lookin at me, which didn't seem bad at all (haven't done that too much before). she would try to set up another evening of games followed by going out + asked me if i wanted to join her for an open air screening of game of thrones on wednesday. it was my first time being invited over to her place too.

when we later went out the evening started to suck a bit. we ended up having another talk, which is stupid, but it just happened. it got really weird guys.. i myself couldn't really tell how much i was still into her after all that time and all the shit that happened. she repeated she didn't want to block me/make me miss out on other opportunities/make me wait for something that perhaps is never going to happen. then she was like "maybe i shouldn't tell you, but my boyfriend is gone for 4 months now and for the first time i feel how happy i can actually be". but still the chaos she experiences was soo big, she's unable to give me a yes, or no, or a maybe. she kept saying that right now it's still impossible because she is never going to betray any of her partners.
in the end i didn't know if i wanted to continue and she was like super afraid i'd quit the contact. she told me she was sure we could do a complete restart, forget about all the complicated things that happened and meet just naturally and whatever happens, happens. she ended the conversation with something like "it's very simple: tomorrow we hear each other and if you want to see me then you join us for playing games in the evening, and if not, then you don't. but i really hope you will not decide against it.."

she wouldn't hit me up the next day (not sure if the whole talking was all fake, or if she felt it was inappropriate since i left her with the feeling i might not want to see her any more). i decided then to give her a call, but it was already pretty late. by that time she was already busy doing something else and was about to go to a party 3 hours later. but she said she felt really relieved that i called her + "maybe we see each other later?".
i instead made dinner plans with 2 other girls that i just recently got to know. the cool thing was that after dinner we ran into her when she was on the way to the party. she seemed a bit irritated and repeated "maybe we see each other later" two more times. in the end i didn't show up though.

what do you think? we finally met, although not under the circumstances i was hoping for. it seems easier to meet her now though. her boyfriend is gone for 4 months and she feels better/more free (+ she repeated she wasn't really happy in the rs). still she said it's impossible that we make out or anything and some aspects still appear to be complicated.
does it sound to you like it's probably a good time to hang out and see how it goes? i'm not sure if it's just a stupid game of her to get the attention she likes. maybe it has been going on for too long..

since i'm not completely sure how much i want her any more, i could imagine to hit her up every once in a while and just hang out, when its uncomplicated and see where it leads. if she flakes i'll follow dw-heart-charmers advice and don't pay her any attention until i try another time or get annoyed and just end it.

She's a co-dependent, has an insecure pattern of attachment, why in god's green earth would she commit to anything with you, or anyone else for that matter?! Especially when she gets to have her cake and eat it. She's not alone, her needs are being met between you and her partner and you're passively going along for the ride.

You're basically riding in the backseat allowing her to dictate where the cars going, where it stops, and who gets in or gets out. The truth is she's not doing ANY of this to you, rather it is you who is agreeing to 'blindly' albeit, naively go along for the ride and continue on with it.

You think this girl wouldn't do the same if she got involved with you and things down the line don't get the way she wants them to? Please. You ARE NOT the exception, she just knows how to keep you strung along, and you're allowing for all this to happen.

Grow a pair and find someone healthy who's unattached. This is not a relationship, and it has no chance of becoming a legimate one. Man-up or continue along this path well into the fall and continue with these bullshit posts.

You're behaving so massively needy you're betraying yourself, and on the outside looking in its sad to watch.

I've been here dude, recently.

She needs you for validation. She's not happy with her boring boyfriend, but she also is too afraid to leave him.

I have learned the hard way that these women are best left in a trail of dust.

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Yup.

Continue being her emotional tampon, and meet her needs (with the seducing lure that PERHAPS she'll meet some of yours <--which she won't, only unless it serves her somehow), or do the smart thing, cut-n'-run and don't look back.

Cut your loses short. And the loses here is your time, effort and emotional investment. She is feeding off the back and forth interactions, the hot and cold, "I kind of like you and I don't want to consciously cheat on my safe boyfriend but would like to keep you as an option if that relationship is over but I don't know if it will really be over and I am also not sure if you are what I really want after all". Besides you don't want to end up in a relationship with someone who started cheating on their partner with you cause that will never work.

If you stop all contact she will become more desperate to keep in touch and will propose to meet. I know you might like this girl but don't give in, put your efforts somewhere else where you can get quicker solid results and don't bother. It is just a HUGE WASTE of TIME.

I'm actually supporting the OP to keep plowing here. Simply because he wasted such a ridiculous amount of time already that he should indeed go ahead until he exhausts all his options.

I'm not even being sarcastic. I fully hope you end up fucking this girl.

It's not that hard man. Meet her in person, just you and her, build some sexual tension and get god damn close already.

Just please do it as a "hobby" not an obsession. Meet other girls in the meantime.

_________________
I know my place. It's me on top of the world.

My in depth texting & dating guide.
There's no such thing as shit-tests.
How to keep a girl.