Cute nerdy girl who says she's shy in social situations. Had a pic of her cat captioned that he'd be mad if she knew his picture was on the internet. So opened with a joke about that and heard back from her much later, at 11pm or so.



Me: I'm totally telling Schlauffy you put his picture on the internet!
Her: Aw, that was just a joke. He's totally cool with it. ​
Me: I think you're just saying that to stay out of trouble... ​
Her: Speak on that.​
Me: Well you said he'd never forgive you... And I know I'd never want a cat mad at me​
Her: Please elaborate.​
Me: You have cats, I'm sure you know how vindictive they can be
Her: Oh? Go on. ​
Me: Hmm... I don't know. I think it's your turn to come up with something ​
Her: Nah, that's alright. I hope you have a nice night!​
Me: ok, you too


So not sure what was going on there, with her just trying to get me to keep going. I was doing my taxes and waiting to check in some AirBnB guests when she finally messaged me (my wild and crazy Saturday night! ) so didn't really want to waste time coming up with some elaborate cat story for a girl clearly putting in no effort.

What could I have done better? Or was it doomed from the start?

Should I try messaging her tomorrow at all?

Seems like she just wanted to see how many times you'd reply with her saying the exact same thing over and over.

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RSDTyler

Why would you want to message this girl again? She didn't want to give you anything. You actually asked for something and she cut contact.

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mpuaforum.proboards.com

I would have left after the "please elaborate."

Me in my head: forget it, I'm out.

I guess I was giving her the benefit of the doubt since she's shy, and this is literally the first girl I've seen on OKC where I actually had common interests.

Plus I figured maybe I was writing bad messages... so were my messages at least ok then?

The first message was fine but then you took it too far. However, it doesn't seem like she was interested from the beginning and was likely trying to be polite.

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mpuaforum.proboards.com

I don't think she was being polite at all. She was literally messing with him from the 2nd message. She basically was saying "Dance, monkey!" from the 2nd message, on.

Anyway to your question Onoma, your messages barely matter if they're not "Hey". I've seen a couple of legit guys(forum members who don't sell stuff), say they've tried copy pasta, commenting on something from her pics/profile briefly, and also writing her a very detailed message(like 3+ unique sentences). They also tested saying "Hey" or "What's up". They really don't do as well with "Hey", but there's little to no difference on whether they send a funny or interesting copy pasta, make a brief unique comment, or a really long, detailed comment.

Your pictures are mostly all that matters. Sending non-generic messages is all you need on the message front. That message was fine.

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RSDTyler

I'm not getting the difference between a copy pasta and a generic message?

I've always thought copy pasta was bad so try to avoid using it... but coming up with messages takes too much effort sometimes so I'd love to have a few I could just cut and paste.

Guys this was a fucking catfish account. I'll bet my life on it.

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If something's not fun, it's not worth doing

Generic is like "You're really pretty!" or "Hey" or "So how do like Chicago?" or "It's so cool that you work at Starbucks!".

A copy pasta message would be something interesting or funny like:

You totally strike me as... [adjective] (it's a good thing!). Am I right? [Adjective = 1. A bookish girl. 2. The kind of girl that drives your parents crazy! 3. A girl who's a great cook. 4. Someone that thinks my dog is adorable.]
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Doritos and Mountain Dew
Awesome or dangerous combo?

Neither of those are amazing openers, but they're a lot more interesting than "Hey" or "You're pretty". They give her something to reply to, which is mostly what you're looking for. Your opening message just needs to get her to not go, "Screw this guy". That's about it. Mostly she'll look at your pictures and give you a yes or a no. All these do is make you less boring. Which is really the only value in an opening message/profile.

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RSDTyler

Ahh, got it. Now I just need to work on my pics...

Thanks guys!

She was bored. She strung you along until you tired yourself out. Its called the "rope a dope". Muhammad Ali made it famous. Your were swinging at air and she was pushing you to swing more so she could soak up the attention and keep it moving. She's "leading" when she's all " keep going' "more" "go further", but I wouldn't waste too much thought energy on it.

One girl on a dating site.. I'm sure you can find another one of those.

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Well, more like until I got annoyed...

Your first message was alright.

She on the other hand may have quite a few dysfunctional neurons. Everything got really weird really fast after her first reply.

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