Met this girl last month.

During each day of our first week, we hooked up and spent the night at each other's place. "Go slow with me," she says to me on one of our nights together. "I'm complicated." She then elaborates on this a bit -- explaining that while it's been a year since her last relationship, she's still feeling a bit on guard with her feelings and would like to invest in getting to know me in a non-physical/sexual way.

We've gone on a few dates at this point:

- Our city's most expensive fine dining restaurant
- The movies
- She invited me to her place and cooked for us
- Another nice dinner
- She invited me to Church
- Another dinner

I offered to take her on a helicopter tour of the city this weekend, since I'm a photographer and am looking to get some aerial shots. She wanted to come, but had to decline because "she just received her weekend schedule for work, and the flight is too late." Okay.

Something worth mentioning is that she brought me back a really nice t-shirt from a vacation she recently went on.

In writing this post, I realize that I am receiving a lot of positive feedback from her. I just have some doubts:

- We went from seeing each other 5 days per week, to 1-2.
- We send about 3-5 texts per day, which is extremely low in my experience. But I feel like I don't have much to talk about. And I don't want to send pointless shit.

Am I overthinking things? I'm interested in this girl, but new to relationships; I have no idea how to gauge how well this is progressing in its first month.

Am I supposed to bring these types of feelings up with her? Or is it too early to have this type of conversation?

How do you guys feel about this?

Thanks

I don't know if she's playing you, but you've put yourself in the position to be played. If I were in your place, I would have acknowledged her "take it slow" request and still worked on creating sexual tension. Requests like that are logical requests and often don't mean much. It's like a person that goes to the bar and says they're only going to have one drink and walks out drunk. Her saying what she should do and what she will do can be two totally different things, but it's your job tobsee which is actually the truth.

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Yes. Look she clearly is telling you to "take is slow", so why the hell would you feel you need to force the 'relationship' card?
Only highly sexually charged, flirty ones are needed.

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When girls want to take it slow it usually means one of the following:

1. You don't push the right buttons and she isn't convinced you are the shit, aka lack of attraction.

2. She has trust issues or some other complicated crap in her back pack.

In either case I would move on. If you don't even have anything to talk about, what are you doing with her? IMO you are "only friends". A good relationship is based on sharing the same dreams. If you don't have any dreams in common you don't have anything to build on.

She has obviously baggages from last relationship of her, therefore like other posters said, maybe she does not want to be relationship with you because of her trust issues or lack of something? Eitherway you should nake investment her not about your material but your feelings. Most exp. restaurant, heli tours and stuff all show that you are more invested than her. So question appears, did she deserve all of that?

Let her chase you, otherwise it is lost time IMO.

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You are a great friend lol probably why you keep getting friend zoned.

She has a pussy. You're not making it wet. You just keep buying her shit while some other guy is gorilla fucking her when you drop her off.

Not saying that what you're doing is wrong and will NEVER get you laid... But there are better ways to do things. Which guy you end up being is your choice.

Ugh.

Arghhhhh

No shit, I'm shocked.


I'm in an exclusive relationship with a 10 right now that I can't get enough of, and even I don't send five texts a day. Great way to kill attraction.




All is not lost, man. Back off for a couple days. NO texts, and ideally wait for her to hit you back. Girls want two things the most: They want to catch a good buzz and to have a lot of orgasms from dominant men. The rest takes care of itself. Worry less about princess rides in helicopters and more about making her see god in the bedroom. Ever see those romance books? Notice the covers? Why do you think women snatch them up? That's what women want deep inside.

It's only been one month. Back the fuck off on expensive dates. Focus on NOTHING but fun. Pizza dates (make her pay half the time), cheap drinks at a dive par, a game of pool, bowling, that all lead back to the bedroom. Like another poster said, she's not sure "you're the shit" right now. She probably has another guy on call. Research sex positions online. Her walls will come down if you open her sexually.

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totally agree, you made me laugh man

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Carpe Diem, Dolce Vita...

Psychal power comes through Mental strenght.

What it comes down to is "Pussy vs Time" - I wrote an article about this called " What Men Want vs What Women Want"

Its biological:

Men are trying to get the "pussy(or whatever it is that we want)" without giving up that much of our time and women are trying to get as much of our time(attention/investment/etc.) as possible before having to give up the pussy. The higher the quality/the lower her view point of the mail the more she will require that he invest his time/attention/etc into her because she gives into what he wants(if she likes him) or just decides that he would make a good friend(if she's not interested) so she can continue to reap the benefits of his resources. He then becomes an orbiter.

So to answer your question.. She's not necessarily playing games. You're just not leading.. What do you want? And do you feel like you've already given enough of you to be deserving of what you want? If yes.. Then why continue giving until you get it? If no, they you have a couple lessons to learn on self worth and this situation may teach you that.

What do you want from her?

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