she couldn't do the distance blah blah bs excuses.

Anyway. This is fking bad and I am very embaressed and ashamed of this.

She is still the only person I think of, I have in my mind the concept that she is everything I look for in a girl. I have tried to forget her, block her out, havnt spoken to her in months nor seen what shes up to. And every time I go out I meet nobody I actually like, and then feel depressed for days just wanting to not do anything.

I went out at the week end after not going out for so long, chatted with a few girls, spent alot on drinking. Got in, and the next few days was so depressed it was ridiculous. I even was so close to leaving work as I did not want to do anything. It makes me feel sick. My friend stopped me and pushed me on to stay, it was so painful. I'm yet to go a day (over a year) where she hasnt come into my mind atleast 5 times throughout the day. Im fucking cursed.

I have read many of these things, keep busy, keep fit, do this do that. None are working. I just feel like shit and that I still want her in my life. Do you guys think it would be time for counselling?

The same advice you got here still applies, despite the new user name and topic.

"None are working" because you need a higher purpose in life. Grow a business, make a better living, whatever. You current purpose is finding someone to fill your ex's spot, and good luck with that, because it will not work.

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Your egos hurt because you got broken up with. It has nothing to do with you "love" for her. This is an compulsive obsession and not "love". This is also largely due to your having an unrealistic outlook on her position in the relationship; which got magnified of course once she left you. You could use someone to analyze that for you and break down what really happened, because you'll be far to cloudy to see it for yourself.

We all go through tribulations... The weak become bitter and The strong become better.

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Are you getting laid at all? It's been two years. She probably has had 9 dicks in her, herpes or a baby by now. Fuck her.

If you give it the effort you will see, one will come along that makes you think what you ever saw in this piece of garbage. And she's right at the crossroad where you didn't try.

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Preach.

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I agree with Eddie here, this sounds to me more like ego attachment than true love.

Ego likes to cling to things, that's how it gains its energy as well as through creating drama in your life. Having a sense of purpose/getting in touch with your core values is like having a compass pointing at true north. If you aren't aware of what those values are, perhaps its time for some reflection and to take some inventory of them. Think about things such as what is it you want out of life, and the life-enriching energy will come back to you.