I remember the alpha male was supposed to be giving and never demand anything in return . So I met this girl a year ago , she was shy , alone and sad . I wanted to help her out , make her happy . She destroyed me . We became close friends and she slowly started draging me into the ground again and again . She noticed how many friends I had ( I had more friends than she did ) and called me a loser ,she said I never go out ( I go out more than her ) and I stay at home doing nothing . She said I will never amount to anything . At some point she started asking for cash and car rides ( in exchange for nothing ) . Although she destroyed me , we were close , really close . I was very confident with other people and strong because I knew at the end of the day I had someone I could share almost everything with and talk to . At some point she even started shuting me up when I spoke about anything . She would call me dumb and disabled because I forgot the person 's name in the story I was telling ( that's all the feedback she would give me ) .So we got bored from each other and she threw me away , stoped answering my texts or answered very short responses like k or whatever or forget it or nothing . We stoped talking and for some time it was a breath of fresh air but I feel soo vulnerable now , when I hear people are going out I remember that I barely go out ( didn't bother me before but now it does and become needy ) on social media when I know what the girl is doing I go through all these emotions .I become needy much more frequently than before . She used to be very jealous about who I spoke to or what I did and who I did it with . Now I am jealous with my friends . This isn't a thread about dating this girl ( I admited to her at some point that dating her would make me commit suicide ) This is about regaining all my inner confidence , filling my void .This girl shaped me into a piece of shit . Usually when I post about my fuck ups with girls I don't mind the bashing but this post is kind of different and please be nice . If you have really just a couple of words to reply with , I really don't mind reading it . Thanks in advance .

I know that you don't want to be bashed, but this is all bullshit to blame something or someone else for your faults. You blame what you perceived of what the alpha male should or used to have been and not being accepted. You're blaming a girl for fucking you up. Take responsibility for yourself. Accept that you fucked yourself up by allowing others to take advantage of you and bring you down to a level that you should not be. A piece shit is a piece of shit no matter how it's shaped.

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At least constructive bashing would be better than plane bashing ... ok I shouldn't have let her do this in the first place, I should have grew some balls .... whatever , sure .Remember the quote " she insn't [...] , she's just misunderstood " ? I'd say people would be better off not understanding ... Now how do I get back to my old self ?

It seems like I keep repeating this. You have to stand for what you believe in and don't let people take advantage of you.

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First off, I would change your name. You're already off to a bad start with that horrible frame you've given yourself. I would even say you should create a new account that has more positive or at least neutral name. Second, listen to what JackZero has said. You need to take full responsibility of yourself and circumstances. Start thinking more positively and approach other girls and get a fresh start.

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How does taking full responsibility help me ?
( the username is an inside joke between me and some other users, don't take it seriously ).

Dude no one has the power to fuck you up, but you. You are the cause, not the effect in a relationship. It's good that this girl came to your life to show how weak you are. If you can't handle this, then how are you going to handle other things in your life?

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Any advise on becoming tougher ?

Be a MAN.

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Take responsibility for your own actions, results, and emotions in your life. No one can fuck you up but you.

_________________
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http://www.pimp-o-nomics.com

Texting eBook
http://www.the-irresistible-man.com/tex ... ast-night/

Pickup On Fire Interview
http://pickuponfire.libsyn.com/podcast/ ... dw-francis

I'd disagree entirely, people can definitely fuck you up. The control he could have taken over it was to leave the girl.

But more importantly, this is all pretty shitty advice. "Man up?" Yeah, that'll do it. Not like the mind is at all complex, or like it's difficult for people to truly control their emotions.

So, I know I'm late to this thread, but for anyone else in a similar position: Look into therapy, specifically EMDR therapy. It's a specific type meant to help process memories that are feeding negative self-beliefs, and turn them into more positive beliefs.

and I'd need for which memorys in particular ?

Whichever ones are still making you think negatively about yourself.

I suspect this girl would be a part of that. Maybe other things too, I don't really know enough to say...

Do you have control over your emotions or does she? Disagree with it, but the only way she can have an effect on you is if let it happen. When she fucks you up, it's not what she does, but what you think and feel about what she does that has the impact. Notice you.

_________________
D.W. Francis - College Takeover
http://www.pimp-o-nomics.com

Texting eBook
http://www.the-irresistible-man.com/tex ... ast-night/

Pickup On Fire Interview
http://pickuponfire.libsyn.com/podcast/ ... dw-francis

If that were true emotional abuse wouldn't be a thing. What you're talking about might be a place you can get to, but no one starts off with that level of emotional control and few actually manage to get there.

"In emotionally abusive relationships, one party systematically controls the other by undermining his or her confidence, worthiness, growth, trust, or emotional stability, or by provoking fear or shame to manipulate or exploit." - https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/an ... onal-abuse