Hey dudes,

Love this forum, and all the wisdom on here. I'm in a quandary right now and wanted some perspective.

I've been seeing a girl for about a month now, on and off. It's been kinda rocky, but there's some solid attraction there. She's quite a bit younger than me (35/21) and there's no shortage of drama in her life.

Last week we had an awesome week. Amazing bedroom time, then an absolutely fantastic day-date. We went to a bunch of places, lots of fooling around, teasing, kissing, holding hands. Felt awesome.

At one of the locations, we were chilling on a couch, and all over each other. Feeling spontaneous I told her I wanted her to be my girlfriend, and she agreed. Since then, she's been kinda awol. She's initiated no calls or texts (she usually initiates) responses to my texts take hours, and are pretty short and generic.

Pretty sure I messed up and jumped into the whole 'girlfriend' thing too soon. My bad.

Here's how I'm reading things, and what I'm now doing.

1. Now the glow of being together last week has gone, and we're back to our normal lives (we live in different cities) she's not sure she really wanted a BF.

2. I'm playing it cool, and not initiating any convo with her.

3. I'm still going out, chatting to girls, making sure I do NOT get oneitis. -)

I'd love any insight you guys have. In terms of what I'd like to accomplish, I like this chick and want to give it a shot. I'm pretty sure I need to get her chasing me again (she does is sporadically) and find a way of heightening her attraction.

Thoughts and insights welcome!

Women will try to cage their mens' inner beasts, but they never want it captive. They just want the thrill of almost succeeding. Does that make sense to you?

That being said, you gave her your freedom on a silver platter without her even asking for it.
She wants to earn that right, not have it handed to her.

The lion will hold onto his freedom and will only give his loyalty to someone who truly deserves it, and once he does that person will feel and know they were chosen. But it won't come easily.
The scrap dog will give his loyalty to just about anyone as long as it means feeding him every now and then.

Nobody wants a scrap dog.

Always let them bring up the relationship talk.

_________________
I know my place. It's me on top of the world.

My in depth texting & dating guide.
There's no such thing as shit-tests.
How to keep a girl.

Thanks for the insight. Yea, she does need to earn it, I like that.

In terms of recovery, I was thinking of saying something along the lines of 'let's get to know each other better before we date' or something like that.

If anything, that will do way more harm than good.

Just treat her exactly as you did before and continue seeing other women.

Words alone don't mean much if they're not backed up by actions.

_________________
I know my place. It's me on top of the world.

My in depth texting & dating guide.
There's no such thing as shit-tests.
How to keep a girl.

So let me get this straight...you want to figure out how to get a 21 year old, who has drama, and lives in a different city to be your gf the correct way?

She probably has a boyfriend too, this forum sometimes...

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USER HAS BEEN BANNED FOR REPEATEDLY IGNORING MOD WARNINGS AND MULTIPLE RULE VIOLATIONS

Look out for red flags
- she's too young. Fuck the law, she just is. You're at different stages of your life.
- Drama in her life. Really? That should tell you a thing or 2 about how the relationship would be.

Now that we've got the painful facts out of the way...

The reason she is leaving you alone now is because you've scared her off.

Once a week, 2-3 texts to set a date. How hard can it be? That'll leave her wondering about you, her attraction to you will grow, which is fucking magical when done correctly. (Anybody who says attraction isn't important, probably hasn't ever REALLY attracted anybody). Don't bring up relationships until she mentions it! Are you a woman? Women will mention it as soon as they're ready, so let her come to you at her own pace. Think of it like a cat... if they're walking to you at their pace, then you pick them up... they run. If you did the same to a dog, they'd get excited and start licking your face and clinging to you. Women are like cats, men are like dogs (I didn't make that end part up, it's just beautifully accurate.

I tell everybody this (cause I don't want you turning into a 1 trick pony PUA, or a "PUA DOESNT WORK!" kind of guy): Go check out Corey Wayne. Follow the principles in his videos for a while, read his book once a week for the next 10 weeks (can get the ebook for free on his website, or buy paperback on Amazon). You'll learn all the basics you need. Only then will you need to know any pick up crap. Most of what I just said was from his book actually. There are other good guys out there... but there's a lot of work that you need to do on yourself first.

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I grew out of the dumb shit I used to say on here. Most of my posts don't represent who I am today at all.

It does not matter if she has a boyfriend. She will choose the best for her.
If she have the drama actually is good, you can show her the protection she wants to feel.Be her knight, but not her puppy.

Women really do their best lol

_________________
I grew out of the dumb shit I used to say on here. Most of my posts don't represent who I am today at all.