We were in a desert on some benches, both naked. It was dark out, with just the moon lighting up the area. It was only us.

We were right about to have sex. Then she told me she didn't want to do it.

Here reason being, "She wants her friendship to be enough for me." She also feels like the sex we had in the past hurt our friendship.

I can't really tell if this is a friend zone thing, since we were both completely naked, then she just wanted to cuddle naked for the rest of the time.

I'm curious on some other perspectives. Did i handle the situation in the right way? I want to learn, so if you guys were in this kind of situation where she said that, what would you have done?

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Unless I've totally missed it, I don't think you told us how you handled it.

How exactly did you handle it?

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Oh whoops, i apologize for missing that.


She partially wanted to have sex. She said she knows that i'm not just like every other guy looking just for sex, but at the same time her mind was telling her i was. She knows i want to be a lawyer when i get older, so she also thinks i talk her into things with those "skills" even though i feel genuine most of the time.

How i handled it was like this:

I said something along the lines of: "It wont mess up our friendship like it did last time. We have both grown so much from then, and we are different people now." "If you really 10000% don't want to, then we won't."

The second after i said that second part, she said, "I really don't want to." And then that was when we just cuddled.

I feel like i messed up here, and really want to learn from it. So i wanted to come to you guys on this.

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My most helpful mentors:
Much thanks too;
Eddie Fews
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R.C.

^^ This sounds like a guy who wants to get his dick wet and is trying some psych game. At least to me.

For LMR - you stop, and try again later ... And continue to escalate as long as you're getting the green light.

Is that what you did?

You had the frame all wrong from the beginning brother. If she were all hot and bothered for you, she wouldn't have said that. You're not looking at the big picture of things.

I would of got up, got dressed, and went home. And this attitude is exactly why I would be in a better position. Its all frame and vibe.

Guys that don't get sex tend to be guys that don't see there time, energy, and effort as being worthy of sex. She got to talk and cuddle all night and you got what? Did you even require anything? And what would you be willing to do if you didn't get it?

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