Saturday. I get my morning lab shit done, and message AE girl. Here's the exchange:
Me:
Hey, are we still planning on hiking today? Trying to plan out my day
Her:
Well, poo. I'm sorry, I just got back from a bike ride with my dad.
Me:
No worries
So... No hike?
Her:
Yeahhhhh... I'm feeling a lay in bed all day kind of day
Unless of course you have your heart on hiking
I'm such a terrible person. I keep suggesting stuff then forgetting about it
Me:
Hm, naw that's fine. I do want to talk to you, though, so let me know when you want to meet up and chat
Her:
Uhoh. Is it serious talk or let's just hang out and have fun talk?
Me:
Uhhh serious talk
Her:
What's on your agenda today?
Me:
A run, and some friends invited me to tubing, so I was waiting to see if we were hiking before responding to that
Her:
Yeah, go be the run, interesting person you are and go tubing! That'll be great
Me:
Ok, I'd rather have this talk, I don't want it looming or in the back of my mind or whatever. Can you meet sometime today or do you want to just talk on the phone?
Her:
I can see if I can borrow a car...
Me:
k k
Her:
When do you go tubing?
Me:
It's at 1, not a huge deal if I miss it
Her:
OK, I smell nasty and look worse from my bike ride. I can leave now and meet you at the alley cat
Me:
Ok cool, I'll see you there in 15
end of interaction
I went fully with the intention of breaking up with her on the grounds of:
She's always tired, and mentions it when she hangs out with me.
She's made plans with me and forgotten about them twice now.
She often would rather stay home lay around and watch Grey's Anatomy than hang out.
She texts less often, engages less often, hangs out less often than she used to. I talk to AG girl and HS girl (the ex) more than I talk to her.
All bullshit, and I was fed up. This all sounds like someone I would have an open, non-exclusive thing with rather than an exclusive relationship.
We meet, and I explain all of this to her, but without the frustration and anger of course. She defends herself, as expected. She IS tired because she sleeps 4 hours a night. She's introverted. She doesn't want to come off as needy. She doesn't think she's interesting, and doesn't think I'd be into doing boring stuff like laying around and watching Grey's Anatomy or doing math.
I ask her if she's still into this, if she wants to keep dating, cuz we can turn it into just friends if she doesn't have the time and energy for it. She says no, she wants to keep dating, she still likes hanging out with me, etc. etc.
She says that now that I've brought this all up with her, she's going to work on it. Ok, we shall see. We both know that we will be busier starting on Monday (classes starting), and I keep telling her if she doesn't think there's enough time or energy we should just be friends, so there's no obligations or whatever.
She keeps saying no, she wants to still date. I'm like okay. In my brain, I tell myself that's strike 1. And I only give 2 strikes.
She keeps saying how she's tired after being social, and how she struggles to keep up with me, she doesn't know how I have so much energy all the time.
We study for 2 hours together. HS calls and excitedly yammers in my ear before I tell her I can't talk. AE girl asks who it is, and I tell her, and she's like, "oh, that's awkward." Then we go to my house and play music until 7ish. Kiss a little bit. The kissing is pretty flat and emotionless. Yuck. She leaves cuz "her parents were expecting her back 4 hours ago". Lol, I feel like I'm in high school. After she leaves, I'm like fuck this shit.
I head over to AG girl's house.
She hang out and play ping pong. She tells me all about her frustrations with RI bro. I tell her about my frustrations with AE girl. We get DEEEEEEEEP into the topic of love, being comfortable in a relationship, and how in a relationship there's always a comfortable person and chasing person. Share a bunch of stories. Laugh a lot. AG girl's awesome. I fall asleep on her couch. I text AE girl:
Me:
Yo, what's the deal with Eli and swimming tomorrow morning, is that happening?
Her:
Let me contact her and I'll let you know when I know
(awhile later)
In all likelikehood, I will be working until 5 tomorrow
But I think that's not too late
Me:
Ok, I'll plan on no morning swim. I've got softball practice at 4
(in my brain, I'm like strike 2, definitely breaking up with you now)
Her:
Okie dokie
Hey, I'm learning a new guitar song
Me:
Yeah?
Her:
*a link to YouTube song Taylor Swift- a place in this world*
Me:
sounds catchy, good luck
Her:
Bahahahaha, thanks. I like Taylor Swift old songs. So good hehehe
Me:
Sleepy time, night night
Her:
Night night!
I wake up to another message from her:
Her:
I had the strangest dream.
Me:
Darth Maul?
Her:
Dead friends, your parents and buffet dinners
Woke up in a weird state
Me:
Hahahahaha
What were my parents like
Her:
Your mom was super nice and spoke English to me. Your dad though wouldn't speak and if he did, it was to someone else in Mandarin
And they were super obsessed with your newly invented 2 year old baby sister and her college fund
Me:
Hahahahaha almost sounds like real life
Her:
Hahaha, it was so weird
Me:
I literally just woke up, don't remember any dreaming. Time to lab it up
Her:
Yeah, same here. Still trying to work up to it tho... I have been laying in bed for over an hour trying to get going
Me:
The trick is not to think, and to just start moving
*end of interaction*
Well, she's trying more. Kudos for that. Her parents are pretty controlling too. I'll give it a couple more days, depending on how / what she does, I'll either break up with her, or extend her deadline.