Getting her back - need reviews for a plan.



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PostPosted: Sun Aug 16, 2015 6:28 am 
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(I read the sticky, I would guess this thread still belongs here? It doesn't seem to fit anywhere else, she's hardly even an ex yet.)

So there's a girl, and I love her. We had a really good relationship, mostly. Really, the only thing wrong with it was that I would neglect her. Neglect her pretty badly...For...reasons. No, I wasn't cheating on her. I just didn't pay her enough attention, and I really don't know why. So, after about 16 months, she left me. It really seemed like it was a very rough decision for her. We both wanted to get married and have a family. I would guess she still has a lot strong emotions for me.

So, my plan is to lay low, relax for a week or two, or more. However long it takes for the anxiety to subside, and for my natural calm and confidence to return. Minimal to no contact with her. Once my confidence returns, send her a text, tell her I just saw something reminding me of her, the way she would sigh in exasperation. It really was unique, and I adored it so. Tell her that I was out with a friend, watching a movie. She's slightly vulnerable to jealousy -- it always made her perk up defensively about me. Ask her what's up, if she'd like to see each other, hang out a bit. Spend the next week or two with just friendly, casual meet ups, keep it very light, very fun. Than drop it on her.

Like..."So, we took some time apart. Did some thinking while we were apart, and it occurred to me that I really like you. And having fun with you over the past week has really made me certain of that. I'd like us to get back together. We both know what went wrong in the past, we don't need to talk about it. It's in the past...Only thing I need to say, is that it's not gonna happen again. I'm ready to fully and completely commit myself to you, and make this work long-term."

And I am completely and fully ready to do so. I am ready to make changes. I'm already working to make those changes. I'm getting my hours changed at work, so I can have more time available to spend with her when we get back together.


Thoughts?


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PostPosted: Sun Aug 16, 2015 10:44 am 
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Terrible idea, but i have to sleep i'll respond tomorrow. Don't do ANYTHING in the mean time.

EDIT:

go watch this http://www.understandingrelationships.c ... back/17707 it'll answer your question.


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PostPosted: Fri Aug 28, 2015 3:36 am 
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Terrible idea, but i have to sleep i'll respond tomorrow. Don't do ANYTHING in the mean time.

EDIT:

go watch this http://www.understandingrelationships.c ... back/17707 it'll answer your question.

This. It fascinates me that the likes of Mystery and Style have 10x the recognition of Corey Wayne lol.

Here's a good thread for you, by myself: viewtopic.php?f=128&t=192365

Sounds like you've been watching Brad Browning or whatever his name is. Don't! He's retarded.

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PostPosted: Fri Aug 28, 2015 4:36 am 
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Bro this is critical time for you to get your shit together.

[quote[We both wanted to get married and have a family. [/quote]
Why do you want this? It's important for you to know the answer. If it is in fact that you might truly be happy this way then I understand. If however, you just think this is the way that people do things and people in love need to get married, then try digging even deeper into what it means to be a man-which is hopefully what you might find here.

I thoroughly believe that you will be best served at being the best man you can be for any girl, not just this girl, but my advise on how to get this girl back is as follows:
Quote:
Once my confidence returns, send her a text, tell her I just saw something reminding me of her, the way she would sigh in exasperation. It really was unique, and I adored it so. Tell her that I was out with a friend, watching a movie.
Don't text this shit. It is needy.
Quote:
She's slightly vulnerable to jealousy
Most women are. Don't play dirty.
Quote:
"So, we took some time apart. Did some thinking while we were apart, and it occurred to me that I really like you. And having fun with you over the past week has really made me certain of that. I'd like us to get back together. We both know what went wrong in the past, we don't need to talk about it. It's in the past...Only thing I need to say, is that it's not gonna happen again. I'm ready to fully and completely commit myself to you, and make this work long-term."
Do not say this. You come off looking like a giant bitch when you say this.
Quote:
And I am completely and fully ready to do so. I am ready to make changes. I'm already working to make those changes. I'm getting my hours changed at work, so I can have more time available to spend with her when we get back together.
This is the wrong frame to come from. She is just the women. She cannot be your whole life. The right frame to come from:
"I do realize how important you are to me in my life and while I know that I shouldn't have taken you for granted, I do want you in my life. If you want to share something special with me that's cool. If not I understand, but I am going to do my mission if you want to come along, I would love to have you here by my side, if not I understand."

You see being totally attached to something such as this girl is going to bring you to a place of misery. Be unattached to her and give her the room she needs so that she feel free to be in your life.

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PostPosted: Fri Aug 28, 2015 8:20 pm 
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No apology for neglecting her? You'd really rather change your work hours than just apologize to the girl? LOL good luck with that


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PostPosted: Sat Aug 29, 2015 10:48 pm 
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Quote:
(I read the sticky, I would guess this thread still belongs here? It doesn't seem to fit anywhere else, she's hardly even an ex yet.)

So there's a girl, and I love her. We had a really good relationship, mostly. Really, the only thing wrong with it was that I would neglect her. Neglect her pretty badly...For...reasons. No, I wasn't cheating on her. I just didn't pay her enough attention, and I really don't know why. So, after about 16 months, she left me. It really seemed like it was a very rough decision for her. We both wanted to get married and have a family. I would guess she still has a lot strong emotions for me.

So, my plan is to lay low, relax for a week or two, or more. However long it takes for the anxiety to subside, and for my natural calm and confidence to return. Minimal to no contact with her. Once my confidence returns, send her a text, tell her...
The attitude was perfect right up until that point I cut within the quote. You don't have to make anything up man. You can pick up with the phone and call her and confidently let her know that you know where you weren't strong in the pass and how you'll be strong in the future. The mind games always backfire. When you center yourself pick up the phone and just keep it real.

Read this first though and decide whether or not its worth it: viewtopic.php?f=25&t=190620

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PostPosted: Tue Sep 01, 2015 5:11 am 
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Cut your losses. Move on and learn from your mistakes.

I know thats probably not what you want to hear but it's going to be the happier route for you in the long run.

You're still gonna play head games with her though lol


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PostPosted: Tue Sep 01, 2015 11:05 pm 
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Quote:
Quote:
Terrible idea, but i have to sleep i'll respond tomorrow. Don't do ANYTHING in the mean time.

EDIT:

go watch this http://www.understandingrelationships.c ... back/17707 it'll answer your question.

This. It fascinates me that the likes of Mystery and Style have 10x the recognition of Corey Wayne lol.

Here's a good thread for you, by myself: viewtopic.php?f=128&t=192365

Sounds like you've been watching Brad Browning or whatever his name is. Don't! He's retarded.
Haha, its funny to read that, because points in your topic and points in Brad Browning books or videos are almost same... :lol:

I think most important thing to do is to restart yourself and start improving and moving on, dont chase after her, dont act needy or insecure, build up your confidence and make her chase after you and then make date, have fun and hook up, but dont step back.. i mean if you start chasing or begging to get back together after you hooked up once or something like that, its big mistake, because you are showing your weakness then and she is seeing "old you", although she needs to see new you or this "you" when you first met...

Woman are more attracted confident and "man on his own" type of men than needy and insecure guys who cant move on with their lives without her... one who cares less controls the relationship ;) This doesnt mean you have to be ignorant but you need to be confident and cool every time, you must be like rock, who dont let move himself by wind... YOU NEED TO BE MAN in every situation and always stay calm and cool.


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PostPosted: Tue Sep 01, 2015 11:38 pm 
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"almost same" in the way that vodka and lager are both alcohol.

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