What to do next? LesbianPua needs advice!



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PostPosted: Fri Jul 31, 2015 3:41 am 
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Joined: Fri Jul 31, 2015 3:34 am
Posts: 35
Hey guys,

I was seeing this girl for about 4 months. We are both in our mid twenties and both girls. We would see each other about once every week, or once every two weeks. The sex was amazing. We would text everyday.

We never spoke about what we were, and I didn't want to bring it up fearing that it would push her away. The last month and a half, she started being a bit distant- initiating conversations less, and up until last week, she started ignoring my texts. She was still on tinder active.

I would give her space, and not text everyday, at least let one day pass before initiating a conversation. But what happened was that we were having a convo and when I asked her when she was free she stopped responding. And she never did that before, 8 hours later I just asked her if she got my message and she answered the next day saying she didn't see it and was not free.

i did asked her when she would be free and she ignored me again. I didn't send another text. But what I saw was that she was on facebook chat the whole time.

So the next day I still don't hear from her so I pretty much sent her an email clarifying my intentions towards her once in for all since we never spoke of what we were... pretty much saying I don't know what's going on, that I like spending time with her, that I don't want to push her away but I would be ready to take what we are to a more serious level, that I'm ready to be exclusive with her. Pretty much that if she still wants to date others it's not gonna work for me and to let me know if she wants to continue.

She responded saying that she had thought about it for a while to tell me about what we were but didn't know how to bring it up but that she doesn't think it can get anymore serious between us, that she was really sorry and wanted to tell me sooner and understands if I don't want to see her again would be willing to remain friends.

i responded with "I don't just want to be your friend. And I don't think we should continue seeing each other if we are not on the same page. I need to take my distances I'm sure you understand. I'm really gonna miss you"

"I'm gonna miss you too, I understand. I hope you find someone who will want to be in love, you deserve it!"

i then blocked and deleted her from facebook.

So about a week passes. I just felt sad and missed her. So I simply texted her a sad emoticon. She responded right away telling me she hopes I'm doing well. I then said, look how about we see each other with no pressure and expectations and just enjoy time together.

She responds saying "are you sure you can do that, without getting attached and not getting hurt?"

I tell her "yes. Since I know your intentions now. Before I didn't know where it was going. We really had fun together"

she he tells me "yes we could keep on seeing each other, but I don't want you to have any expectations and I also don't want you to be hurt, so you have to tell me if ever you feel hurt in this"

i respond "sounds good, don't worry I will be honest with you"

she says "good "

so now it's been about four days since that conversation. I don't know what to do from now on.


1) should I wait a few more days before texting her or how should go about to proceed in this? How can I re-attract her?

2) should I add her back on facebook?

thank you guys!


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PostPosted: Fri Jul 31, 2015 4:24 am 
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Joined: Tue Mar 26, 2013 6:34 pm
Posts: 3993
She doesn't want a relationship with you and just wanted to let you down easy.


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PostPosted: Fri Jul 31, 2015 4:07 pm 
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King Among Mortals
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Joined: Tue Oct 18, 2011 8:36 pm
Posts: 7592
Location: United States
Quote:
She doesn't want a relationship with you and just wanted to let you down easy.
+1

Same ol' clingy monster rearing it's head.

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PostPosted: Fri Jul 31, 2015 5:02 pm 
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Joined: Thu Jun 27, 2013 8:08 pm
Posts: 5028
Website: http://www.EddieFews.com
Location: New York City
You're stalking, you've developed what we call "oneitis" or what girls may call "overly attached and emotional" and she began to pull away.

You guys are both acting on your feelings, someones got to be the anchor.

You reattract her with self control and patience. You give her the space that she's asking for while you focusing on bringing happiness into your own life despite her. No woman wants to be leaned on for happiness, she wants to be brought into a world of happiness you've already developed on your won.

So you can't have her, because you aren't yet capable of being happy without her.

Don't add her on Facebook. And do not contact her. Its likely she will feel "uneasy" about her behavior and reach out to you to see how you've doing given the right amounts of space and time. Although even if she doesn't, you have to learn to be happy first. You have to come to the table with something. You're wanting.. you aren't acknowledging whether or not you have something to offer.

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