Hey man,

I relate a lot to what you have posted here and the frame of mind you are in right now. I can relate to feeling this way a few years ago when I severely depressed. I would slip between moods where I would approach a hundred chicks in a day to weeks where I would sit inside all week and play video games. I still do that now sometimes.

Playing video is games is GOOD. Don't let people tell you you need to stop doing something you enjoy. Even if it IS indulging in escapism. Fuck it dude. Play them and enjoy them. Don't beat yourself up. You aren't graded on a linear scale of how much of a man you were when you die. Just enjoy them and don't ANALYZE what you did afterwards. YES you COULD have gone out and approached women.. but at the point of time, in your current emotional state.. you chose something else. There are no right or wrong decisions.. just actions and consequences. SO let go of your guilt dude. It really only makes your mental health worse.

The biggest realization for me is that I was fighting a battle against myself, and there's no victor or loser if there's only one combatant. It's a circle of pain and guilt. You spend eight hours playing video games -> I suck, I'm the biggest sack of shit -> play video games to distract yourself -> I suck.. -> And on and on it goes.

But, really man. Have you tried simply forgetting about all theory and game stuff and just enjoy life?

I know it's hard, like, fucking hard, the hardest thing you could EVER do is to surrender to life.

I am a very analytical person myself, and it's something I struggle almost every day.

Then there are other days where I leap out of bed and I feel fucking amazing and unconquerable.

Just one day at a time.. doing things just a little bit better. Do one more thing I'm suppose to do. Work an extra 10 minutes harder. Do just one set of exercises, make eye contact with just one girl, talk to one chick on the bus.. I'm sure you get what I mean!

It's really important to accept yourself as you are as well as committing to a slow, painful, gradual change over your entire life. That's reality. That's what really works. And that's exactly why you won't see it marketed to you by the big name companies.. because that idea doesn't sell.

You need to realize the magnitude of how hard and how much work this will be.

Life will never be easier for you. It will always be hard. The conditions of your life might improve, but: "Wherever you go, there you are." You need to expect to fight with the demons every day, for decades.. if not the rest of your life. Either that or give up and stop worrying about this altogether.

This is why so many people can't do this.. or anything of real significance. It's too much work, too damn hard, too much time. People love their comfort zones.

I can recommend you start reading books such as Vasha, Eckhart Tolle, Albert Camus.. to open your spiritual dimension.. so you don't take this shit TOO SERIOUSLY. Because in the end, it's all just a fucking joke. None of it matters, at all. If you or I die the world will not even notice. It will carry on as it always did.. and even your loved ones will one day forget you as well. Everything is so INSIGNIFICANT so why blow things completely out of proportion and make it into a big deal?

Your life isn't important. YOU aren't important. It's all just a big fucking joke. This isn't meant to be depressing, it's suppose to liberate you.

Let me tell you something very interesting:

My job during the day is a salesman. I make between 100 and 200 phone calls per day, every day in a nice office. My job is to set appointments for a broker to sell a service.

Now, people say cold calling is the absolute worst job.. they could be right if they had the wrong mentality.. same thing with talking to women.

You see.. when I am cold calling business owners.. I only want to talk more with the low hanging fruit. And if they say 'Not Interested'. I simply hang up and call the next number. I am LOOKING FOR BUYERS, not trying to CONVINCE SOMEONE that doesn't want what I sell to buy.. that's a massive waste of time. And there's nothing you can do or say to make someone go from a NOT INTERESTED to a YES PLEASE COME OVER.

So.. it's not about ME or how great of a salesman I am. It's about THEM and what they think they want and need. It's just about reaching those people who like me and my product, and focusing my energy on those.. that's how I sell A LOT of stuff for my business, by getting rid of the people who are not a fit.

NOW think about day game, or just picking up chicks for a moment and cold calling.

There are some very strong parallels here, in fact I would say they are close to being identical.

THE REALITY.. not what marketers say.. but what happens in real life.. is that you might meet 100 girls and only 4 or 5 will be down to fuck. That's just.. how it is.. and it's true for almost every guy. Some people you like.. some you don't. And then it becomes a task of just finding those 5 out of a hundred and playing them out until the end.

Just like there's nothing I can say to make a NOT INTERESTED into a sale, it doesn't really matter how fluent I am in verbal game.. if a chick doesn't like my image or my vibe.. there's nothing I can do with the exception of pretending im someone im not.

It's just.. how it is! There's no fancy technique.. you don't need any technique at all actually.. just be relaxed and keep the interaction going. That's it. That's my game.. that combined with physicality and leading.


I really am not trying to attack you. I respect what you are doing a lot, and consider you in at arms with me against the common man. But this shit needs to stop, dude. For your own sake and that of other people. Just RELAX. RELAX. RELAX. Try meditation, if you don't like it spend more time at a park or something.. just work on getting all those negative chemicals and emotions out of your body. It's bad for your soul.

I hope you grasped some meaning of what I was trying to say here.. but I'll leave you with this quote by Camus which has always resonated with me, and I think it applies to you too:

In the essay, Camus introduces his philosophy of the absurd: man's futile search for meaning, unity, and clarity in the face of an unintelligible world devoid of God and eternal truths or values. Does the realization of the absurd require suicide? Camus answers: "No. It requires revolt."

I started pickup because I really wanted to get laid but I now realize it's x1000 easier and faster to just get a prostitute (via sex tourism so it's legal).

Ever since I started to binge on nonstop movies and videogames my entire life came to a halt. I am 100% certain that I won't be able to make any progress until I overcome the impossible and stop engaging in them at all costs.

Life Update 5:42 PM 5/15/2015

I'm quitting pickup.

I started pickup because I really wanted to get laid but I now realize it's x1000 easier and faster to just get a prostitute (via sex tourism so it's legal). I also started pickup because I wanted a relationship with a cute girl but now I realize I already had a few ALL ALONG (but I just never even realized it but we were friends for such a long time that I never even occurred to me that they were female - they were more like a brother to me).

Further reflection taught me, it's the dumbest thing in the world. I thought I would get some ultimate high and that's why all this time I was chasing this high (doing pickup) but it turns out that it's the most stupid thing in the world: a shallow, superficial pleasure that only lasts for a few moments and is meaningless. That being said, the original reasons why I started pickup are no longer relevant and that's why I'm quitting.

My main focus is to get my life together now because right now it's a wreck.
- I know that I had a fancy post before about how I was going to change everything for the better but I actually did 0% of what I posted. I can talk a big talk and have massive wishful thinking and plans about how everything is going to change but when shit actually hits the fan: I DO NOTHING. I'm really good at planning but bad at executing.
- The saddest thing of all is that I took a semester off to get laid but I ended up wasting the majority of it via playing videogames and watching movies. What a terrible waste of time, money and resources.
- I hate talking about the same thing over and over and over again but I am still convinced that I am trapped in an indestructible pokeball. My main priority right now to get my life together and escape this pokeball.

Once I do that, I may or may not go back to doing pickup. I really have to think HARD about what I want out of life and do some deep soul-searching. I'll have to plan my next move. Life is more than just pursuing bitches.

That being said, I am still taking a trip to Puerto Rico to do pickup with one of my favorite person in the world right now: Luis Ramos. I have been looking forward to this trip for a long time and there's no way in hell am I going to drop it. I'm going to enjoy myself and unleash the HULK. I hope to do 500 sets in 10 days, which is only 50 sets a day and get it all on camera. I am also pursuing a career as a cop and am going to a cadet orientation later this week. I hope things go smoothly.

Ever since I started to binge on nonstop movies and videogames my entire life came to a halt. I am 100% certain that I won't be able to make any progress until I overcome the impossible and stop engaging in them at all costs.

Initially I planned on taking off two semesters off college so I can focus on doing pickup 100% of the time and get laid ASAP but what ended up happening is that I FAILED myself and just wasted all of that time on movies, videogames and a bunch of other useless shit that got me NOWHERE. This realization has obliterated my self-esteem and life confidence. I remember when I was a kid I thought "I CAN DO ANYTHING" but now here I am trapped in a pokeball - realizing my limitations. I am now contemplating going back to college NEXT semester instead of the semester after that:
(1) I am currently doing nothing productive and am wasting my time.
(2) I'm going to run out of money soon and need the tuition fund. I currently have $600 in total cash and will run out in 6 months (Not enough to last me for another semester off - unless I take another job but I don't want to do that).
(3) I realized how dumb, shallow, fleeting and superficial the high of pickup is.
(4) If anything, it would be better to take a semester off in Spring 2016 instead of Fall 2015 because (1) the constant grind of college work will snap me out of this depression, laziness habits and get be back into the zone. And (2) If I get called for the Cadet program I want to be ready with 45 credits and a high gpa.

The only drawback is that I will probably losing the 4 months off that I designated for pickup 100%. So that's why I am still hesitant about this decision. I hope to come to a decision soon.

Either way, even if I am quitting pickup I'm not going to quit writing about networking and charisma and doing pickup for simple research purposes. There is also a probability that once I get my life together I"ll get back to doing pickup again. I am also very much considering taking classes in multiple different colleges so I have official access to pickup girls in high-security campuses.


I LEARNED THIS THE HARDWAY:
THE ONLY WAY TO GET ACCESS INSIDE SOME HIGH-SECURITY COLLEGE CAMPUSES IS TO ACTUALLY BE TAKING A CLASS THERE!!!! ONCE YOU ARE INSIDE THEN ITS A GOLDMINE OF SEXY FRESHMAN CHICKS WHO ARE x1000 EASIER TO PICKUP THAT DOING PICKUP IN THE STREETS. (Because they care about their social reputation).


Time will tell. And I hope I snap out of this depression again so I can have 100% access to my skills and abilities because what being sad does is that it drowns you from being effective.

Will post an update as soon as I can.

Cheers,

xx

No offense bro, but you're behaviour has been giving off a rather bi-polar vibe.

You seem more interested in pushing your "business" and approaching sets than you do in actually allowing pickup to improve your life.

However, I do agree that you should take some time off and reevaluate/reassess your life. Think hard about WHY you want to do what you have been doing, and look at ways at addressing those core wants that your behaviour has revolved around meeting.

Please see Da again. You and your friend should stick with him instead of doing this alone. If Da has a fee, pay it.

Prostitution is legal where I live and there are legal brothels I go to that are only about a 10 minute drive away. Where I used to live the brothels were actually within walking distance (albeit a long walking distance).

When I first started using prostitutes I quickly became addicted to it. A part of me didn't like it though, especially due to the amount of money I was wasting, but my horny side would always come out on top and so I would give in to the temptation.

These days I generally don't like going to brothels altogether. I rarely visit a brothel during the day or after work as it just makes me feel shit for the rest of the day. Only times I go is on a Saturday night after trying to pick up chicks in a club. And even that I've been managing to reduce the partaking frequency of.

There's something unsatisfying about visiting a prostitute. What I really want is to at least get one unpaid for root in my life. Just one to see how it differs from a paid for root.

In the past I wondered if I would get the same guilty feeling after having sex with a non-prostitute that I would get after having sex with a prostitute. That guilt feeling is pretty much gone now but I really want a mutual sexual experience. I want to please women in the bedroom - not just get my rocks off.
I used to really enjoy playing video games. I still do but I hardly ever get any new games to keep me entertained. I tend to just recycle the same old stuff. I don't really get much fulfillment out of games and other entertainment as I previously did.

My whole life has pretty much become about trying to get an unpaid for root. Everything else is just work and filling in time.

(1) You've been fortunate to have access LEGALLY to prostitutes so I say enjoy it and take advantage of it.

stop licking my balls, they're already clean
I don't have a pickup business but I do like it when people read my stuff.

The advice that you gave infuriated me but then with regret I hate to admit that you're right. I have been more concerned with being popular than actually improving my life and quite frankly, am also continuing to do pickup with unknown reasons. I don't really know why I am continuing to do this stuff.

I thought it was for sex but I can legally get that from prostitutes.
I thought it was for a relationship with a cute girl but I already have that.
So what even is the point?

Maybe it's because I like the adventure or the self-development process that it puts me through. Or maybe it's because I need to prove to myself that I can do this, I've been doing this for so long that my ego is attached to it. The truth is: I don't know why I'm doing this, I just am. When you've been doing something forever, you tend to keep that same pattern even if you don't understand whether that pattern is worth it or not. Plus, I have no other hobby - really. So it's kind of something to do to escape the boredom.

But there are a few benefits of daygame including:
1. networking skills
2. social skills
3. i wanted to be a writer, so this gives me something to write about. (expertise and knowledge)
4. good times, adventure and an adrenaline rush
5. making videos and writing FRs is awesome!!!

(at least it used to be until some fuckin haters from SP came along and destroyed my passion for pickup. the simple pickup forums is a bunch of immature teenagers (most of which are KJs) who will attack anyone who doesn't have superior quality game. small rant: I used to post my rejection videos and wonder why isn't everyone else doing the same? and then I got insider information that the pickup coaches DELETE their rejection videos. reason? because you don't get sympathy for sucking at game, you just get insulted and berated. the only good thing that came from my posting is that I met a few cool guys and got some good advice).

but the downside is:
1. extremely time consuming
2. against my religion (flirting with girls is a sin) my justification for this was: that it's for research purposes but I think that's just a bullshit excuse I've been using to not feel guilty

conclusion: I am undecided if I will continue or not but hope to come with an answer after much deep introspection

stop licking my balls, they're already clean

It's obvious that your conflict is causing you to waste significant time, effort, money, and other resources on a lifestyle that opposes views.

Please expand on this a bit. I don't understand what you mean by a "lifestyle that opposes views" and how am I wasting my time?

It gives me a reason to live, makes me happy and gives me something to look forward to: instead of long boring dull days.

Please expand on this a bit. I don't understand what you mean by a "lifestyle that opposes views" and how am I wasting my time?

And #2: I know that flirting with girls is a sin but I've decided that I'm going to keep being religious and doing everything that I have to do: except this one thing. I'm still going to keep talking to girls and if I go to hell for this, then so be it. Although I will stop wasting seed immediately: that's a grave sin and nothing can justify it. #3: I have a good reputation in the Jewish world and I have been trying to hide my pickup lifestyle from them but it's falling apart. The bottom line is that if I keep going down this path, I'll be exposed as not fully orthodox and then it will be hard to marry an orthodox very religious girl (which was a childhood dream of mine).