I think the problem with "looks matter" is that most guys mishear it as:

You have to be a born superhandsome chiseled male model to get laid, or otherwice accept having an ugly girlfriend you have to get by begging for months

It might be more constructive to say "You have to be her type to attract her". Because that's what it's really about. It's about dispelling the notion that you can "create attraction".

And also what "looks matters" means is that your most fit, in shape version will be more attractive than an out-of-shape version of you... But that's unfortunately not how guys read it.

They read it as "so you're saying I have to be Brad Pitt to get laid at all" -> which is why they get so defensive.



I left one out, so what "looks matters really means is", as I said:

1) You have to be her type physically, and that's individual to every woman
2) The most fit version of you will attract a lot more women than an out-of-shape version of you (all else being equal)

***And I left out***

3) Looks matters means you generally have to be within 3 points from the girl.

- So to get a 10, its possible at most if you're a 7, though most likely if you're an 8 or a 9.

- Fortunately this isn't so defeatist or bad as your physique goes into your overall looks. If you're a 5 naturally (face, body symmetry etc), getting a great physique can make you a 7... So even a "natural 5" can become attractive enough to date 10s.

- Though anyone who has any experience with women will tell you that LITERALLY in real life you get NO additional joy or pleasure out of banging 10s than you do 8s, or even 7s... really. A cute 7 that has a tight body, you'll feel just as great banging her as a 10...

Like anyone with good sexual experience will confirm this to you, there's literally zero additional benefit to banging 10s, you don't feel better, the orgasms aren't any better... they're not better to cuddle with than 8s... really.

So really, there's no reason to ever feel bad about the fact that looks matter, it doesn't mean you're doomed to a shitty sex life.

All that "looks matter means is

1) "Don't be an obese slob that dresses like a bum, going around ONLY hitting on 10s and 9s, then crying about getting nowhere"

2) Don't take it personally if you don't attract a girl, you're simply not her type. There's nothing she or you can do about it, it's just mismatching DNA... that's it, nothing to take personally.

There are hundreds of millions of girls who are hot to other guys, but you can't get turned on by them, because they're just not your type. Despite there being nothing unattractive about these girls - they're just NOT YOUR TYPE.

Can less attractive guys even compete with good looking guys for one night stands with hot girls? Will hot girls ever lust after guys who arent good looking, but have preselection and game? And confidence? Im just starting to go out with the intention to pick up and chat with girls. I know for now, I won't be confident to approach a girl who's out of my league. Will I realistically have a shot with them, when I'm good enough? Do you have friends that arent good looking and get the same quality of girls that you get?

Depends on what you mean by "hot girls"

- If you mean supermodels (top 0.1% of pornstars or top 10% of models), then NO.

- If you simply mean cute girls with tight bodies, then YES.

And why would you view "cute girls with tight bodies" as being out of your league?
Those are 7s and 8s really. Are you naturally a 4 or something!??

Notice that "leagues" aren't exact. It's more like a range, where you can get girls within 2-3 points from you, due to subjectivity and tastes and personal preferences... If you're a 6, then sevens and eights are "in your league".

And if you are actually a "4", then get well-defined, get muscular, get some amazing clothes and you'll become a 6-7. Cute girls with tight bodies (sevens and eights) will be in your league easy.





Again some dude asks:
Alex Novy response:

That's the variation part. For some girls you're a 5, to some you're a 7. This is why this stuff is a numbers game. Go interview some girls about the celebs deemed "hottest guys on the planet, you'll be surprised. One girl's "10" is another girl's 7.

I'm getting the sense that you take each girl's attraction to you as if it determined your looks to every other girl on the planet (I might be completely projecting, forgive me).

Just go out and try to meet a lot of women, you'll be surprised. One day a 5 will be disgusted by you, the next day you'll meet a 7 who thinks you're the cutest guy ever.

.... What I'm trying to say is, you can only ascertain your "league" through a bunch of experience and see what you can get when you AVERAGE your experiences with a lot of women. Don't be fooled by a small sample size.

- If a 7 crushes on you one day it doesn't mean that you're a "7 magnet", you might just be her type for some reason.

- If a 4 rejects you, it doesn't mean you are a "2".

- Get a lot of experience, and then you'll see where you stand.

- Getting an athletic physique will increase you rank by 1-2 points (unless you're already somewhat athletic)

But I don't know about the last point. I always thought getting an athletic physique would have a larger impact, like 3-4 points on this 1 -10 looks scale (relative to your position with an average physique).

Was I really so way off by assuming that?

Btw, scientists can't agree on this. Take 12 studies, they find 12 different results. Some find a bigger effect, some find a smaller effect. And they use different methodologies and different ways of definiHonestly I'm guesstimating off my head, i'm not using a calculator when I write this stuff. I'm just guesstimating having read about a dozen papers on this, it's not precise math. And honestly, I say 2 points (from average to jacked) precisely because I'm afraid of overstating it.ng the male physique... so... it's not precise...

I just say:

- 2 points for average to jacked
- 3 points for obese to jacked

Because I'm trying to keep it moderate and prevent "overstating it". This way I know I'm not saying anything unrealistic. It might actually be more...

And yes, that's what it means about "natural 5 to 7"

If you're of average shape, and a 5 "naturally"... because you have an average face, average symmetry, complexion etc... Getting a jacked body will make you a 7.

It's the same for us guys as it is for girls if you think about it.

- There are girls we see as a 7 because she has a 7 face and average body
- There are girls we see as a 7 because she has an average face and BANGING body

The only part I disagree with is using a 1-10 rating system, because it assumes objectivity.

Build an emotional connection through your hard throbbing cock.
Build trust and comfort by holding their hands and covertly rubbing your elbows on their nipples.

That's because there basically is. There is actually very, very little subjectivity to women's looks. There have been good studies on this. Show 100 guys, pictures of 100 women and ask them to pick the top ten. The same 22 women make up %100 of choices. 78 of the women get not one single man choosing her. Did the same thing with 100 women and 100 pictures of men. Pick the top ten, slightly over HALF of the guys ended up in at least one woman's list.
And whereas four of the ten women ended up in %95+ of the men's lists, no one man ended up in even 4/5 of the women's list.
The breakdown was pretty striking. 12 of the women made up %75 of the male choices. The other 10 made up the remaining %25. For men, the top 25 made up only %70 of female choices. With the additional 27 making up the last %30.

There is a lot of subjectivity to male looks. There is very little subjectivity to female looks. This holds true for weight and body type as well. Women legitimately have preferences that range from very thin guys(tone, but little muscle), to very large guys(tone or not toned). Men almost exclusively like slimmer women(no more than 120lbs), unless they have an hourglass figure(then it can range up to about 135).

There may be some subjectivity to whether she's cute or smoking hot, but there is pretty much no subjectivity to whether she's attractive. The only modifier there, is how low you'll go on what you consider "fuckable" - for some guys, that's an average girl, for some guys, that's a billy goat.

Build an emotional connection through your hard throbbing cock.
Build trust and comfort by holding their hands and covertly rubbing your elbows on their nipples.

Build an emotional connection through your hard throbbing cock.
Build trust and comfort by holding their hands and covertly rubbing your elbows on their nipples.

*Bumping with fresh content*

So, I decided to try to figure this out a bit. I've been bringing this topic of bodyfat up with girls in a discrete way(not directly saying, why do they always seem to match). The most common thing I hear is, that she doesn't want him to be skinnier than her. I had several say to the effect "I wouldn't want to date a guy who looks better than me naked".
So this was pretty interesting.
The thing they kept bringing up, was basically competing with him. If she feels like he's leaner than her, every time she looks at him, she feels fat. They were telling me they had a hard time relaxing around him, because they were always fretting about being too fat. And keep in mind, I have exactly zero obese friends. Most are slim, and at absolute most are cute chubby girls(cap out below 150). So this is not fat chick mentality.

I also noticed a split between extroverted and introverted girls. The extroverted ones were the most likely to be cool with dating a guy who's leaner than them, while the more introverted ones, seemed more reluctant.

I think this has important implications. I've not seen this discussed in seduction before, and it seems like a pretty major issue.

Have any of you noticed this at all? I would really like some outside input, here.

*Bumping with fresh content*

So, I decided to try to figure this out a bit. I've been bringing this topic of bodyfat up with girls in a discrete way(not directly saying, why do they always seem to match). The most common thing I hear is, that she doesn't want him to be skinnier than her. I had several say to the effect "I wouldn't want to date a guy who looks better than me naked".
So this was pretty interesting.
The thing they kept bringing up, was basically competing with him. If she feels like he's leaner than her, every time she looks at him, she feels fat. They were telling me they had a hard time relaxing around him, because they were always fretting about being too fat. And keep in mind, I have exactly zero obese friends. Most are slim, and at absolute most are cute chubby girls(cap out below 150). So this is not fat chick mentality.

I also noticed a split between extroverted and introverted girls. The extroverted ones were the most likely to be cool with dating a guy who's leaner than them, while the more introverted ones, seemed more reluctant.

I think this has important implications. I've not seen this discussed in seduction before, and it seems like a pretty major issue.

Have any of you noticed this at all? I would really like some outside input, here.