Friend zone help.



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 Post subject: Friend zone help.
PostPosted: Mon May 11, 2015 11:01 am 
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I fucked up. I Missed opportunities and misread signals (holding hands, linking arms) from a friend of mines, who had recently broken up with her ex, and I ended up telling her (I know, shit move) I see her as more than a friend and asked her on a date. She replied that she was not ready for a relationship and we should remain friends. The problem is I really like this girl. She may not be the best looking but her personality is amazing.
Anyways, I told her I'd like a break from our friendship for a while to get my head screwed on (I have exams soon). She respected that, and told a mutual friend how much she cares for me and is petrified of losing me as a friend.

Here's the problem. As much as i love this girls friendship and company, I feel that the more time I spend with her the more I will like her, which will make it worse as she has already friendzoned me. Although trying to get over her is difficult too.
I still like this girl and would do anything to be in a relationship with her. i have already tried talking to other girls to get over it, but I haven't been able to get over her.

I know most of you will probably say forget about her, but I can't. Is there any possibility of escaping the friendzone with her? I hope to at least be friends with her but can't see it being how it used to be.


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 Post subject: Re: Friend zone help.
PostPosted: Mon May 11, 2015 12:01 pm 
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I still like this girl and would do anything to be in a relationship with her.
And that's why you won't.

You shared basically no intimacy with her - not even a kiss - but already dream about a relationship? I honestly doubt you tried talking to other girls and even if you did, "hey how's your day?" doesn't qualify as talking.

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 Post subject: Re: Friend zone help.
PostPosted: Mon May 11, 2015 12:33 pm 
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Location: Toronto, Canada
Quote:
I ended up telling her (I know, shit move) I see her as more than a friend and asked her on a date.
This was your problem. Just don't do this ever.
Quote:
I still like this girl and would do anything to be in a relationship with her.
Cause she's so awesome? She's better than every girl in the world? Have you talked to every other girl in the world? What if she's a closet racist, or has violent herpes outbreaks or something, man. You know nothing about her, sexually or really, really personally. She could very well be someone you wouldn't even like. You're in love with the idea of her... not her --- cause you don't know her in a relationship capacity.


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 Post subject: Re: Friend zone help.
PostPosted: Mon May 11, 2015 3:41 pm 
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You basically mind fucked yourself bro. And you're continuing to do which is pushing you further into the direction that you do not want to be in.

A girl doesn't friend zone a guy, a guy friendzones himself by putting the women on such a high pedestal that she becomes out of his reach.

You think yourself into this condition. It is the way you perceive her that determines where you'll end up with her. This is the same mentality shared by many of guys who have posted this same story over and over. You guys keep coming and all of your stories end up the same.

The guys telling you to "Get a new girl" are only tell you that because that is the mentality and perception (I can find another) that is "attractive". She doesn't want to be with the guy they will do anything to be with her. She wants the guy that will leave her if she's not willing to do anything to be with him. You're in the opposite spot and can be nothing other than a friend so long as you think of her this way.

This isn't an easy thing. You have to either begin COMPLETELY RISKING the friendship by making aggressive escalation type moves on her or spend 2-4 months thinking yourself into a place in which you value yourself more than you value her.

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