| In contrary to the old Eminem song don't lose yourself...in PUA techniques and tactics. Make sure the technique you use is serving your identity and not you serving the technique. What do I mean by that?
When we show up here all we want to know is how to get results or be less lonely and bring women into our lives. Guys immediately pipe up and tell you what "techniques" to use or work with that will bring results. The reason for this is simple --- the shit works. The problem is these are techniques typically made up by someone else. It was congruent to the original author of them but not to you. Still we can go out we can replicate these techniques as that original author right? We can Neg, we can DHV, we can kino, we can run a best friends test, left handed fluffy bunny routine or whatever and we can make it work consistently with the right practice of the technique.
Many many guys start to conform their identities into something that they didn't mean to be based on those techniques and then aren't truly ever satisfied. They have a pink mohawk, some nice shoes, feathers on their belt, and they are in the club every weekend pulling girls but aren't happy. Well if we aren't happy then what the hell is the point of all this work?
If you are a guy that likes to relax and chill out and stuff then don't put yourself in those high stimulus environments with clubs and dance floors unless you are just doing it to learn a skill to be well rounded or whatever. Then in that case once you get consistent results stop, and move on.
Everyone keeps getting pointed to start at the technique. Go to the technique and do this, or if you do that technique this way then you'll get results.
Instead I think we need to start telling guys coming in, "Look you need to figure out your identity first then you can start tailoring these techniques and pick out what you want almost like a buffet line of PUA techniques and ideas." There is plenty of stuff centered around online, day, night, high energy environments, low energy environments, relationships, single night lays, or just about whatever you want right?
That's hard I know because guys come in here wanting a "quick fix" for their problems for the lack of women in their lives or how to get the one girl right. They don't want to hear you need to build your identity they want the magic pill that bags them a babe with some magic words whispered in the girls ear.
So many guys I've seen come and go and they haven't established an identity for themselves, they have no sense of themselves, and no self expression. They say I'll be whoever I need to be to get the girl. I'll act like whoever to get a laid. Then when the results come it is cheapened in some ways because it wasn't you and your congruent stories and your techniques that got the girl, it was some PUA who wrote a book or whose video you watched, or someones advice from here. It never feels completely real. Sure it feels good in the short term while you're kissing her but long term it doesn't work out so well.
Establish your identity figure out for yourselves who you are, what are you passionate about, your insecurities, the things you are attracted to about women, the things you are not attracted to, and what you want no matter how crazy it sounds to anyone else, and then go for it. Only then start picking those things that compliment your identity and how YOU want to meet people and live your life.
Own the techniques and tactics that you want to use, don't let them own you. At the end of all your journey ensure you are going to be happy. _________________ Been around the world twice, Talked to everyone once...
|