I just want to know when meeting a guy why does he lie about himself? The lies are pretty trivial. I found out that he lied or stretched the true about his age, education, even heritage. Makes me wonder about a guy's integrity and duplicity. At one point or another the truth will come out and when that happens the relationship will be compromised. I would rather have someone like me for me than for something that I am not. So I don't understand the guy that does it.

Everyone lies, but if you are asking why they lie about such stupid things as age etc its due to a lack of confidence in who they are and they will do anything to push that part of themselves away.

Also this thread isn't constructive nor fitting for this forum, stop focusing on what other people do wrong and work on perfecting yourself. The only consistent factor in anyones life is ones self.

Welcome to the forum, Mira.

Good to see more female members (It's my opinion you bunch add a unique perspective sometimes)...

The lies you're talking about here --- some are trivial, some aren't.

I'd almost say where he's stretching the truth he's probably just trying to impress you a little bit (bear in mind that's without me actually knowing the context in which he stretched the truth).

Lying about age... you must be older than him, so he's making sure you don't give him the "i'm too old for you" excuse...

Lying about education and heritage, that's a weird one, unless he's really ashamed of where he comes from and how he grew up.

There's also the possibility he simply wanted to get in your pants, so he went balls to the wall, full out lies to impress you for a one night stand or short term relationship as FBs...

Its a reflection of a lack of self confidence. But its also a reflection of the shallowness of women when it comes to online dating. A guy wants you to like him for him as well. But would you be interested in him prior to the connection had he not stretched out the details a bit.

I guess its the same reason women where make up, push up bras and yoga pants. Its a stretch of the truth. Why not just go outside plainly if you wanted someone to fully except you for you? The truth will come out eventually.

Men are visual; so women expand the visuals to attract us. And women are more cultural and so guys expand the cultural details to attract them.

If you like him for him, I believe you can look past the lies and work on building a relationship with honesty being the base.

Sit with him, rub off all your make up, and have him confess all the lies and stretches of truth. Tell him you'll accept him either way; and he'll follow up by doing the same.

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The man who lies is out to get something. That something is definitely not a relationship with you.

Unless you are talking about some guy who lied and you got into a relationship with him and then you found out later that he lied about it all.

He lied to impress you. Comes with the territory of dealing with average men. The last time I lied to a girl was in the 5th grade when I told my gf I had cable TV because I didn't want her to think I was poor. My brother happened to be eaves dropping on the conversation and called me out on the phone right then and there. I was embarrassed and wanted to murder his ass. But then my GF said it was ok. Ever since that day I've moved with an honesty is the best policy mentality.

He could also be a habitual liar. Habitual liars often don't need a reason to lie other than just for the sake of lying.

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When women first meet men they often screen even for trivial things. He may have been rejected for trivial things before which gave him a false indicator that those things were bad. So he felt pressure to lie rather than go on. Its not much different than a girl lying to a guy saying shes only fucked 3 guys when she fucked 30. She has probably been rejected for saying it before and its trivial. Look past it.

If you want to understand why some men lie, watch Aladdin (that animated Disney movie).



The entire plot of this movie (and many others) is based on Aladdin trying to "win" Jasmine with lies, but that's what causes all of the problems in the first place. If he were honest from the beginning with her, the movie would have been 5 minutes long and the sequel would just be porn.

Some people are slow and they take too long to realize that being honest with people makes everything easier.