My name is Gabriel. I started an open relationship with my girlfriend (5 happy years) because I'm open minded and we both agreed on it after giving a lot of though and rationalizing that we want to be with each other till we die and we have evolutionary needs to do a lot of people. We started to feel that the relationship was boring and our sex life dull. I decided it was the right thing to do, and now, I need to man up and save my relationship. I don't regret entering the open relationship, i just regret entering it, while being an afc. I'm very ambitious and plan to do great things with my life. So far that hasnt happened. I jave made progress here and there, but i have so much more potential. One of these troubles of my life is approaching strangers(specially girls) my gf already fucked like 3 guys and I'm down to 0. My ego is broken, we agreed to be discreet and she doesnt really hide it well. also recently she inverted the cat string on me. She no longer cares what i do. She no longer cares how i feel. And she lacks the excitemet we used to have. Naturally, its been 2 days of me being an afc. I try to neg her, i try to freeze her, and she doesnt care the same way somebody friendzones you. Btw, the sex has been amazing for both, and I rock her really hard, but i feel like she is usong me. I no longer feel its organic and that she means to stay with me in the future(even though she affirms she adores me). My solution is to get my game on so she see's that we are both equal and I have the pote tial of getting as much ass as she gets dick. My second solution is to make my life so rich and full of awsomeness that it will change her dissapointment in the afc i have become and i can bring something new to her life again. I dont think dates are the solution, it seems to me that she will se that as weaak behavior. I dont want to lose her. We've been through a lot, and we are more to each other than anybody else. btw, i dont make a lot of money, i think this has to do with whats going on because it affects the lifestyle i give her and my self esteem. If someone can teach me the game in Los Angeles to save my relatioship. Please PM me. Im desperate to pick up girls, regain my confidence and life back. And keep the girl of my dreams, and be the man i promised i would be. Now im just an afc.

She brought Up Making it open first?

We had passively talked about it before. We agreed to it as a patch to our crumbling relationship. The problem is most likely my lack of confidence Since the beggening of all of this.but yes, she did initially suggest it as part of a conversation we were having about how its sad that people lose the love drug after a given amoint of time, and how love is a commitement and appritiation of each other rather than the feeling you get the first year of the relationship. we both agreed we both missed the thrill of the hunt.she did suggest it first i did not push it. But it was more natural, part of a conversation.

She is my life and I used to be or might still be, (who knows) the most important Person in each other's lifes. We've been through so much crap and hapyness in these 5 years. It is a distraction, but a motivator as well. I cant lose her and i need mommentum. I think if I up the score on my behalf and also make the relationship funner at the same time that might fix things. Any thoughts?

Wow...just wow.

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Well you are in a relationship. You should be able to openly communicate.

One option is to come right out and say you thought you could handle an open relationship, but you really can't... And that you don't want that anymore (almost sounds like the truth).

The risk there is that she'll decide otherwise and break it off...

Regardless, you're in a relationship. If you aren't happy - TALK.

I understand the five year thing and the disappointment of a breakup. The fact that he believes that this girl is his life is what bothers me. She is a part of his life. They both have a responsibility to contribute to the other person's happiness, but her being his life is such a powerful statement and he has defined what his ultimate weakness is. I feel for the OP, but IMO he needs to stop and look at how he views his relationship and more importantly of what it takes to be happy in life.

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Thanks for the imput guys, it really rongs with some solutions that i had in mind. You guys are right, I'm not nessesarily going to stop paying attention to her. But i think that by focusing on becoming a better person (self value) and becomig a better pua she will definetly remember why we are in this with each other instead of other people. Also, I will talk to her about keeping things low key, because they do affect me when its right in my face. Becoming a successful pua will definetly balance us by increasing my value. If there are any kind mentors anywhere near Los Angeles. Let me know. Im ready to become the very best pua i can be.

Btw, most of these thoughts I can't really share with close people because its like throwing more wood in the fire. But you guus have very intelligent opinions and ideas to keep me sane. Thanks for the support. Its nice to see that puas are well intentioned brothas.

How old are you Pechan?

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I'm 22.
Btw, latest update. I talked to her, we've always had a mature way of dealing with life and this wasn't the exception.I took her out to sushi in little tokyo and we talked about what was going on. As it turns out, she is a little distracted because of these new changes in our life, I told her I was cool with everything(which I am) as long as she doesn't neglect our relationship and the time we spend together. Everything turned out great and now its all about rebuilding my self esteem and getting my first pua close. I told her that as soon as we were on the same level(me actually getting some) we would be able to share our misadventures so we dont miss out on each others latest updates. Thanks a bunch you guys. Needed the advice badly and now things are back to normal. as long as I keep myself improvong and always active I think this momentum will continue to go well.

True. I have nothing to say on this...it's just so fucked up

i absolutely agree. dude's gf convinced him to let her fuck other guys while he chills on the sidelines. men are quickly becoming women and women are quickly becoming men these days... insane, terrifying, sad.

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You must be overconfident and cocksure, even if you haven't got a god damn thing in the world going for you. And you must fail with women until you do not fear the possibility of failure, whereupon you will succeed wildly.