When they start talking to someone else



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PostPosted: Sun Nov 16, 2014 6:10 pm 
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Sometimes I will be talking to a girl I just opened. She will smile or laugh and talk to me for a bit but is not really locked in or hooked yet. Maybe its been a minute. Then she will start talking to someone else as if I'm not even there.

Now this doesn't really fuck with me but I usually end up just leaving because for me to try to get her attention again feels needy and try hard. I know it doesn't always mean I'm blown out but if she has given me no reason to fight for her attention why should I? Does anyone else have this happen? What do you do when this happens?


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PostPosted: Sun Nov 16, 2014 6:20 pm 
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Everything women do is either a test or a celebration so you can to deal with it as a test. Also keep in mind that women can be a lot more clueless than us about what to do in these situations. We're the ones with the so-called approaching experience. How are they supposed to know what to do when they actually approached? Its not like they sit around preparing, read books, and spends time studying what do when a guy approachs them on the streets(or whatever)

This is why we must lead, because they DON'T know what to do. They are enough so concerned about potentially having an awkward moment that they will reject a guy that actually like out of fear. I see it happen all the time. So don't be so hard on yourself; just become a more efficient leader, because they don't know what to do man. Not in those situations. They need your leadership to reign supreme.

And I say practice avoidance. If you're successfully holding her attention there is not real room for her to talk to anyone. Now if you're boring, without an actual purpose for approaching - offering no guidance and leadership, why would they have a reason to continue talking to you? Hm..

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PostPosted: Sun Nov 16, 2014 8:06 pm 
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Appreciate the feedback man. Not too sure how to better lead or contribute value in a situation where I'm still just getting to know her (first minute or so) but yeah I'm pretty sure I'm giving off the wrong impression a lot of the times when this happens for sure. I guess I agree its better to prevent it than to get into that situation.


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PostPosted: Mon Nov 17, 2014 2:00 am 
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This is why we must lead, because they DON'T know what to do. They are enough so concerned about potentially having an awkward moment that they will reject a guy that actually like out of fear. I see it happen all the time. So don't be so hard on yourself; just become a more efficient leader, because they don't know what to do man. Not in those situations. They need your leadership to reign supreme.
So true. A girl you are speaking with and having some sparks with suddenly senses 1 millisecond of an awkward moment and starts to walk away. This is where leadership comes into play. "cmere cmere", and she scampers back, eyes fluttering, ready for more playful banter.

OP: Preside over the women with a knowing that you are presenting them a rare treat of speaking with you. Your time is valuable. You lock in eyes. Your flirtatious vibe tells her that you are a man who knows what he wants and you're seeing if she is cool enough to hang with you.


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PostPosted: Tue Nov 18, 2014 4:43 am 
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This is usually a test, but it is a fvcking tricky one at that. What I will usually do is just make sure you are unaffected by her ignorance, that you still would like to talk to her, but you don’t need her attention. The best thing you could probably do is talk to a different person for a little bit, but stay in the same area as her. Stay close and don’t move away from her. She will see that you just randomly started a conversation with another person, and will probably realize that you are just a guy who likes to talk to people. Not just some creep who’s trying to sleep with her.

You can avoid this all together by sparking attraction in her better to begin with.

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PostPosted: Tue Nov 25, 2014 3:25 am 
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Quote:
Sometimes I will be talking to a girl I just opened. She will smile or laugh and talk to me for a bit but is not really locked in or hooked yet. Maybe its been a minute. Then she will start talking to someone else as if I'm not even there.

Now this doesn't really fuck with me but I usually end up just leaving because for me to try to get her attention again feels needy and try hard. I know it doesn't always mean I'm blown out but if she has given me no reason to fight for her attention why should I? Does anyone else have this happen? What do you do when this happens?
stay in set and stay in conversation - dont address it as rude and dont even acknowledge it happened, keep talking and asking open ended questions. most importantly you wont learn anything unless you stay in set

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PostPosted: Sat Dec 27, 2014 1:38 pm 
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Used to happen to me all the time at work. My workplace was a nightclub so there was tons of hot girls and sometimes I would talk to the waitresses having a smoke on the patio, they seemed pretty engaged until one of their girlfriends came by or someone with high status like a promoter, then the girl would be completely focused on tjem and I would be frozen out of the convo. Most of the time I just chilled out for a bit and then walked off since I found it boring listening to someone elses conversation.


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