Hi. So this HB7, we are in relationship for 6 months now(we're both 20). Recently, she found a job, and not so rare, she mentions this guy she works with. She had very low self esteem, and she said that this job makes her better for me, because she always felt like she was not enough worthy for me. And this job offers this to her, she believes because of it she will talk less about her insecurity's and flaws. But, she seems distant. She, because of the work can't contact me like 8-9 hours straight.

And just yesterday, she mentioned how she had a dream where she kissed some dude and it felt disgusting(Shit test?), I didn't let it bother me, I kept my cool by saying something like:"That's cute, how was that kiss anyway? Lips to lips or?", then she replied it was with lips, after that answer she dropped that thing.

Now guys, is she becoming more distant or am I paranoid of losing her? One more thing, change in her behavior, she always wakes up early in the morning, this time she answered me in like midday time, saying she can't sleep, has bad dreams, she feels irritated, not saying by me.

What do you think?

_________________
Uncertainty is the root of all progress and all growth.

I don't know if she is being distant but here are my thoughts.

Problem with a girl having low self esteem and being young, is that she doesn't know who she is. My advice for anyone dating when 20, is not to take it too seriously. People change at this age. You're in high school right, she's starting a new job after college or at least in college. As she gets older and gets more experience, her self esteem is gonna raise. She's gonna be around men who have degrees who compliment her and make her feel better about herself. Maybe she will want more than you offer. It sounds negative but relationships at 20 are not solid.

you already lost her. she found out that she can get attention from guys with more intrinsic value than you.

But why is she then always typing 15 messages per hour when i'm not around, or why does she says so often how she loves me and tells me she wants to get married? You know. I'm confused.

_________________
Uncertainty is the root of all progress and all growth.

hey bro... look the best thing you can do now is this just be there for her. Don't be acting all AFC`ish when trying to resolve things with her, remember communication is key in all relationships. And maybe its time to spice things up, seeing that things seem so tense. Have fun bro

OP, you are the MAN, never forget this; never let yourself feel inferior to another man. Drop comparing which is ego-based. If a particular girl isn't up to your standards there are LITERALLY billions more who would love a chance with you.

she feels guilty because she's attracted to other guys. that's why she does that.

Yea could be. You all may be right, however... It's about the mindset, I started acting distant as an answer to her aloofness, today there was this huge gathering(long story) and she was there just as I was. I give her guys( pay attention )zero attention, I talked to other girls and had fun not even thinking about what she was doing. After a while, let's say hour and a half, I found her sitting alone with her girlfriend on a bench, I sat with her, and my attitude was like nothing every bad happened. I hugged her, she hugged back and kissed back

(I had this C&F attitude AGAIN which I long didn't have because I was afraid of loosing her, so because of that fear I was lately just sitting numb, now, I't just old me back again, the one that was alpha in the beginning)

...we talked a little, and in 10 minutes I was gone, she also invited me to her house this friday because she will be alone.
I think I'm slowly begin to get it, it's about the mindset, and it's always the guy who's fault is, if he's GF leaves him, because men are born to lead, not to sit, numb, and spread boredom to relationship.

_________________
Uncertainty is the root of all progress and all growth.

no it's not always the guys fault. but it is in this case. just game her again.

If she's wants to get married at 20 -- you should get the fuck out a there -- look man just give her some space , she's just stressed, and btw be wary of this other dude ! Get your girl to invite him out for some drinks and just make sure he's a pal and not an enemy

Whats pretty AFC is to sit there and ask her "was it on the lips?", tolerating her talking like that... my girlfriend would get a swift smack if she spoke like that (USER HAS BEEN WARNED FOR THIS POST -mod)... Shes becoming distant? Bring it up, confront the situation... i see these bullshit puas saying to pretend like you dont care, when in reality your being a chump by holding in your feelings.

My girls dont associate with other men, they dont tolerate getting hit on and they sure as fuck dont have guy friends... Thats my character, its what i expect, and its been working perfectly for me for the last 2 years. She doesn't like it? NEXT. Dont be surprised if she starts fucking one of these guys behind your back, youll be kicking yourself because the signs are all there.

Grab your nuts, set the boundaries, and if she cant accept them.... your not losing anything special. Theres no such thing as guy friends , and shes enjoying attention from other men. If i were you id drop her and never speak until she learns to respect her man.

Quit being a chump and set the boundaries or cut it off before you come crying her because she cheated on you.

just wanted to comment on the previous post. the one from the afc champ.
that's the type of behaviour you don't want to have. it's abusive, aggressive, narrowminded and obsessive. not sure where you can find girls without any male friends but if you do they are lying. What I'm not surprised is that they cheat on you with all that fear and anxiety you have that makes it so obsessive and needy. yeah I know it because I'm always bf destroying guys like that. it's really easy. really love this pseudo champs that think they are the best and then I'm the one fucking their gfs. They do all the work for me. thanks they exist.
that's why I also think pua is also a social obligation. those girls after being with me will never want a jerk like that and will have a much better life. I've got the experience of many of them thanking me for that even after I dumped them.
guys like this are not only losers but also give a very bad reputation to the whole community. But it's no biggie because they always fail and most end up in jail over aggression and/or domestic violence charges.

unknownpoet

Are you refereeing to d0minantsp3cies with: or me?
Was my response AFCish, what should have I done differently?

_________________
Uncertainty is the root of all progress and all growth.

d0minantsp3cies

What is she insecure about and what did she say about the guy?