but he won't know what he's doing wrong in this initial, fledgling relationship stage if you don't point out the mistakes he's made in this one, whether this one survives or not. for example, initiating the "will you date me" talk 3 weeks ago. never supposed do that. and yet you weren't going to tell OP that. neo wasn't going to tell OP that. stuff like that can lose you a perfectly good wife because you've pressed too hard too soon.

i'm pressing on this so hard because i've been in OP's exact situation, and have ended up getting the girl and being in a satisfying LTR with her that ended on my terms not hers.

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You must be overconfident and cocksure, even if you haven't got a god damn thing in the world going for you. And you must fail with women until you do not fear the possibility of failure, whereupon you will succeed wildly.

lol first you say don't freeze her out because she didn't lose interest. now you are saying don't freeze her out because she has already lost interest. right.

and you're right, a freeze out doesn't work if she's lost interest. it only works if she's starting to lose interest. what doesn't work at all, what kills any remaining interest she might have, is telling a girl "take it or leave it" immediately after she says "we need to slow down" (and she's right to say slow down when he asks for a relationship 3 weeks in, a very important point that you keep missing here. she's right to say slow down. he's moving too fast.). saying take it or leave it in response to what she says smacks of desperation. of neediness to move swiftly into a relationship for security purposes. of an unwillingness to let a relationship blossom and take its time. that's what that communicates. because it's saying "take me moving too fast for a relationship and seeming clingy and needy, or leave it so that i can go move too fast and make some other woman uncomfortable." do you understand that? does that make sense? that's the entire reason why what you're advising OP to do is wrong. that is basically a sacrifice of the relationship, which does have personal and inner game benefits as you have pointed out.

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You must be overconfident and cocksure, even if you haven't got a god damn thing in the world going for you. And you must fail with women until you do not fear the possibility of failure, whereupon you will succeed wildly.

jack, a hypothetical:

you're getting burned out with a girl. you text her saying you need to slow it down. she texts back, "take it or leave it."

are you somehow more attracted to her now?

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You must be overconfident and cocksure, even if you haven't got a god damn thing in the world going for you. And you must fail with women until you do not fear the possibility of failure, whereupon you will succeed wildly.

Chantos, again you're coming from the frame of trying to keep the girl in a relationship. Where are you getting this take it or leave it thing? To paraphrase Jack, do what you want. Details of how long they dated before, who asked who were unknown up to that point. If the OP had realized they had moved to fast and agreed that they should slow down , Jack's was to agree and slow down. If he thought they had not, Jack's advice was to next. Do what you want to do. Not, continue the relationship at the current speed. You are seeing an ultimatum where someone just makes the best choice for themselves. An accurate hypothetical would be she texts you back either "Ok, your right, we did move too fast" if she agreed or "I'm not sure we're looking for the same things. If you're having doubts so soon obviously we aren't right for each other. Take care" Where do you get ultimatum from "Do what you want" ???

Umm...you are giving him advice on what to do with this girl and not the next girl. In your initial statement, you didn't say shit on how to do it right for the next time...it was only for this girl and it made no sense based on your reasoning behind it. On the other hand, maybe I didn't talk to him about how he approaches women and seduces them, I did see a flaw in how he thinks and I believed that he was adopting the wrong choices on how he accepts his relationships and I spoke up on it.

I pray to God that if a girl is trying choose between me and another guy that he gets his advice from you. While he's freezing her out, I'll keep her pussy nice and warm.

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Neo87, Chantos is more concerned about being right about something, even if he doesn't know what it is.I tell her that I won't waste her time. It's fair to her and she's free to be off to the next guy. I'm not worried because so far in my life there has always been a next girl.

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mpuaforum.proboards.com

from JackZero:

"But you miss my point. It's about his happiness. He should not be in a situation where he is not happy. I'm okay with giving her the two options because it's more than she's giving him. "

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You must be overconfident and cocksure, even if you haven't got a god damn thing in the world going for you. And you must fail with women until you do not fear the possibility of failure, whereupon you will succeed wildly.

fuck are you talking about dude...

directly quoting shit from my first post that applies in every situation not just this:

1. you don't chat with chicks who want to slow things down. you meet to get drinks, you game them, you take them home and you bang them. then you kick them out because you are a busy fellow and they do not deserve "relationship" perks until they have proven themselves.

2. always let the girl initiate the "i want to be in a relationship" communication.

3. if you want a relationship with a woman, it's not really helpful for you to have a "take it or leave it" attitude this early.

4. you have to attract her. make her chase you. be vague. be mysterious. fill her with doubt as to whether you even really like her

5. maintain a positive, cheerful, cocky, sexual demeanor in all interactions. tease her. flirt with her. you don't hate her. you're just busy fucking other women.


those 5 things alone will help this guy infinitely more than all of your Yoda-isms. your theory is fine but you don't give the guy any practical advice whatsoever to actually use. he has no clue how to react to any of these common situations. he can't read the signs when she's losing interest. he can't know when to show interest and when to withhold it. again, you're not helping this guy whatsoever in this particular situation, just giving him ethereal maxims that cannot be implemented if he doesn't have concrete applications of them.
with your tongue no doubt

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You must be overconfident and cocksure, even if you haven't got a god damn thing in the world going for you. And you must fail with women until you do not fear the possibility of failure, whereupon you will succeed wildly.

exactly. thanks.

and if she had instead texted back, "you know, you're right. i'm really sorry. i just really like you and want to be around you, kinda on my mind a good bit haha. i'll tone it down though, no big deal. call me when you wanna hang out again : )" you'd think, "wow this girl is pretty good to do that. might have to keep her around," because she would have displayed legit feminine qualities of subservience, kindness, consideration, giving you your space, etc.

how you respond to shit matters. saying the right thing at the right time matters.

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You must be overconfident and cocksure, even if you haven't got a god damn thing in the world going for you. And you must fail with women until you do not fear the possibility of failure, whereupon you will succeed wildly.

I agree with Jack's advice because it's non game playing. Whether it's a first date or a millionth, I believe you should be able to talk to the person you're seeing and get clarification if there is a problem. The problem i see with chantos solution is that it's too assumption based. My first priority would be to talk to the girl, not a freeze out.

Oops...you've finally got something right. I was more focused on the advice you gave about how to get this girl. You've been jumping around so much, I've lost track of what you say with all of the little tangents you go on. Again, you can find this information in any post on how to get a girl or repeated in over and over in almost any pick up book which is probably why I forgot that regurgitated information in your first post. I'm not impressed because hindsight is 20/20. What you don't get is that I'm telling the OP is that he has to look out for his happiness first. You can try to call it a yoda-ism to try to take the strength away from what I say, but anyone who can really get women and be happy with women they get will tell you the same thing. If you can't figure out what you need to be happy and be willing to walk away if it doesn't, I can understand why you would believe it is an ethereal maxim and can't be applied to real life. That's the common denominator for all AFCs. Haha! You probably mean that as an insult. Another sign of lacking real life experience.

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mpuaforum.proboards.com

Hey, it looks like this particular woman has a habit of basking in male attention. Even if she isn't sleeping with the other guys... the mere attention of them...

Here's the thing right, you have loyal monogamous girls who have developed 1o1 habits. She keeps girl friends and focuses on long term 1o1 intimate encounters with men. Then you have the girls like the massage therapist in my field report who has a constellation of orbiters. They have different habits associated with the idea or male attention.

Like how people have different habits associated with the idea of smoking: her body and mind will try and reach out to the thing that's most precious to her. I find that women you meet in clubs tend to have the habits of basking in chump glory

Raining men right?

I don't know my readers level of habit understanding, but basically the first 30 days or so are the hardest because the habit is tunneling through the brain trying to connect, and the next 60 days cement neural connection pathways in the mind of the person which is the habit.

Complicated?

This is a habit wrapped around a concept. One of those will be created when you start your interactions.

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8NA_o1jOjsQ[/youtube]

Not to say that human beings are 100% robotic and habit programmed.

I do have a stance that the 99 percent just ride with their software and let these roads and networks create themselves.

So if proper game isn't used while you're impregnating her mind with your networks you get a buggy system, and holes for her old habits to slip in and get her back to her old ways.

Your like trying to get the girl to quit getting that high from the mass of guys.

On the flip side the other woman is very quick to jump into a relationship with you. The one that only gets the high from one guy that she is intimate with. An advanced PUA should be able to be dropped in any populated city in the world with the shirt on his back and have a girlfriend before the next day.

Some girls will become your GF without even sleeping with you honestly.

Anyway, taking on the girl who loves lots of male attention as a wife can lead to loyalty issues when you get comfortable and she falls off the wagon.

For her what works best is to get her to chase you. These girls are more in the indirect game guy's area of expertise. Taking your attention away from her, but on a positive note will bring her back to you, and at the very least leaves you a window to get back in any time you feel like it.

I wouldn't advise pursuing this woman into a relationship unless you're comfortable enough in your true personality, and believe everything you do to the point where you can just be yourself around her 24/7 365 and not get any serious explosions from her bad habits. Only pure fun and joy.

Well I don't know what you like, maybe your the love the way you lie type:
[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uelHwf8o7_U[/youtube]

Seriously over 700 million views... ah aggressive valued, chump love... It's cute.

The problem is your fault. You're intentions don't seem to be of the chump love type and are basically: I'm desperate for her because I won't get sex due to my lack of options at the moment.

I don't know if this means you don't feel like you can get any other girls, if you don't feel like going after other girls, and/or that you are afraid of approaching other girls. Regardless that's a perspective problem. You'll have to either marry this true love or deal with your real issues about your belief systems on choice.

How often do you sleep with the girl? Every night? 1 time a week?

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I am a hunter of human excellence. I seek out those individuals who break the norms
and demonstrate to all of us what’s really possible. I learn what those few
extraordinary individuals do that’s different from everybody else, and then emulate
them.

This is one of the reasons I don't get your logic. You're okay with with letting a girl know that you won't waste her time, but you have issue with letting her know that you don't want her to waste your time. You say she will respond subservient if you reject her at take it or leave it because and she would display feminine qualities. If you accepted her demand to slow down, you would be taking on those same feminine qualities.

Masculinity stands for something and your offer to be a suave ladies' man is not a masculine solution(ladies' man means being the property of a lady). You're putting a bandaid on bullet hole the moment you accept a position of weakness. Accepting something you don't want when you don't have to is weak no matter how you try to spin it. At the end of the day femininity does not respect weak males.

Here's something that I hope you figure out when you are more experienced. Saying the right thing at the right time is nothing more than manipulation and will eventually fail. Saying what you mean and not betraying what you say is far more effective.

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i have no problem with jack's first bit of advice, in theory. but i do not see how it benefits OP to have that advice without any framework or without any time taken to address why he's in the situation he's in.

for example:

"do what you want to do. if you want to slow things down, do so. if you don't, next her."

i agree that, theoretically, OP should behave this way. unfortunately, this does nothing to address why the girl called and told him she wanted them to slow down. no girl ever says that to me. because i don't move fast, as it kills attraction.

now if OP knows what he did and that's how he wants to act, then i think jack's advice is spot-on. however, if OP doesn't realize that asking the woman if they were dating killed the chase aspect, i think it's far, far more beneficial to point that out, rather than simply tell him (after she's lost interest) that he should do what he wants. that doesn't address his situation. it won't help him in the future either if he continues to kill attraction.

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You must be overconfident and cocksure, even if you haven't got a god damn thing in the world going for you. And you must fail with women until you do not fear the possibility of failure, whereupon you will succeed wildly.

lol i personally won't eat out a woman who is fucking other guys on the side and who could have had another dude's cum all over her pussy a couple hours before i'm going down on her, but to each his own sir.

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You must be overconfident and cocksure, even if you haven't got a god damn thing in the world going for you. And you must fail with women until you do not fear the possibility of failure, whereupon you will succeed wildly.