I wasn't discovered because I gad told her that I was using the community. She knew it since the first week of our relationship. I was surprised that she would dig up old posts from 2009 to confront me. That she did it at 04h in the morning made it borderline insane to me. I didn't react calmly, that's true, because I felt it was deeply unfair of her to evaluate our relationship due to old postings from long before we met and to criticize me for seeking advice. She didn't even object to the content of my postings -except for lay reports and the fact I told an anonym audience private details - but to the audience I was adressing. And this level of unfairness coupled with the sheer unrelatedness of our troubles made me lose my cool. Also, I realized I was very bad at crisis management. Another point to keep in mind.

You'll get another shot to make things right.

Just let her be and stop posting on the forum for right now. Its not helping; you have to trust that you'll pull this through on your own. If you need to call a buddy call a buddy, ONE buddy. And then just relax. We always get another shot, but forum posting isn't helping you.

However I will add.. Since I know how women are. If she just came out of the blue and did this; there is something she did that she feels guilty about. And so she is looking for a reason to not feel as guilty as she does. Something to justify her actions. This is also a BIG possibility.

_________________
Need Coaching? For 1 on 1 Coaching via SPAM, Phone or Instant Messenger - Email: EddieFews@Gmail.com

Show Support, Buy The Book: 'The Secret Laws Of Social Wisdom - Click Here

http://www.EddieFews.com

Do you mean by "another shot" to explain it or to reestablish a relationship? I am fed up with the former and doubting the latter. We talked last Wednesday after 4 weeks of no contact. We talked for 8h, I thought I might get another shot, she was very soft in the end, crying that I would now apply all that I had learnt from ourrelationship to another woman. When I told her I'd like to apply it to us, she was soft again, saying "Fool me once ..." but not in an assertive voice. She still shot me down a few days later when I asked for a walk. With an SMS reading "Thanks, but no". We spoke again and she said that her life was into too much turmoil because of the breakup and she wanted to be calm again. Now my pride is butthurt and I will wait a few weeks, eventually even after new year, to text her again, if I still feel the need.
She's not a cheater, we had sex right until the end. She is prone to affective behaviour but also a very stubborn and proud (in the negative sense) person. She will stick to her decisions, even if she made them in the heat of the moment. And so I think this PUA stuff gives her the logical reason she needs to support hêr decision.

I'll concentrate on my stuff for now, as I have a PhD thesis to finish until end of the year.

Thanks for the support.