your post is the first that i can remember someone actually giving a woman an HB10 rating. that's interesting in a good way. just know that Approach Anxiety (AA) never really goes away. You just have to work past it. Don't beat yourself up too much if it creeps back in. It happens to most of us. Just get yourself in state and go for it. Also, don't really worry about quantity. Just enjoy the moment where ever that is.

Well I haven't posted in a while, here's a quick synopsis on what's been going on.

Basically been trying to focus on studying to get my license, hadn't been going out at all at night but I was still going to the park daily.

Then comes a work party on Feb. 9th. I work at a pub downtown, I was last to leave, walked with a female co-worker to her car then headed for mine. On the way I stopped to get a hot dog. Long story short some guy was talking shit to the hot dog guy, then starts with me. He gets in my face, I might have pushed him, then one of his friends come behind and hit me in the head with a bottle or something. Pretty bad facial injury, nothing broken though. Worst is I sprained my ankle so haven't been able to go walk at the park.

Moral of the story is be careful out there. There are some low life motherfuckers out there who will do shit like this. Planning on going back and talking to the hot dog guy to see if he knows anything. Luckily I got right up when it happened but I don't remember getting hit, or who did it or what. I'll update when I know. SOrry to post kind of off topic but I want to stay in the habit of posting here and this story is kind of the reason I haven't posted because I've been in no condition to do any type of sarging lately.

Well I haven't posted here in forever. I've been trying to focus on my career, hasn't really been going that well. Let's see if I can catch things up. I've been doing much better with women than I ever have in my life. I've approached many more girls and gotten many more numbers than I ever used to. I still get tons of flakes and I usually screw something up during the texting phase.

I'm going to try to start approaching things in a more organized way. Although I'm much more confident approaching, many times I still make an excuse not to. Also I'm drinking too much and doing drugs and shit when I go out, which I know is definitely a waste of time. Sometimes I know there are sets that are a waste of time because the groups to big, or they're obviously with bf's or whatever, but I think I should approach everyone.

Having said all that I've used what I have learned about game and it's amazing how much I was totally clueless about. When I keep in mind what I know about approaching, disqualifying, dealing with shit-tests, etc., I have enjoyed much more success. As recently as last week I took home a different girl two nights in a row, which was a first for me. The first one was just ok the second girl was about the best looking chick I've fucked in years. So yeah I feel like if I really focus and approach things in an organized manner, I can really start to make progress. Anyways thanks for reading and I'll be posting more in the coming days.

Right so I've been having some mixed results. Was out last night at an Oktoberfest party. Talked to a bunch of different girls. I think maybe I was talking to too many. I also am still drinking too much. I was hitting on a chick who was doing a promo for a liquor company. Had a decent connection with her started talking to her about this tattoo. Later I took a picture with her on her phone, then suggested I give he my number so i put it in her phone but stupidly didn't call myself. Also I was hitting on one of the other promo girls so I think that was a mistake. Later they were all sitting together and I wanted to approach again but felt I would look stupid because I was hitting on two of them. idk probably should have done it anyway. I was also talking to this other chick a lot who was there with a party of like 9 girls. I think that was a waste of time I couldn't split her off by herself. At one point I did get her outside to smoke but some of the friends were out there and instantly swooped in.

Throughout the evening I talked to a bunch of girls. I had made up my mind that I was going to be aggressive and try to isolate and k close right away. I never did, didn't ever feel like I had a girl who was ready to go for it but idk maybe I just chickened out. I was too drunk to really tell what I was doing after a certain point. I still feel like it's so much easier to talk after you have a few drinks.
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All in all it wasn't a very successful night but I'm out there trying. I also feel like I need to focus on getting my career goals and financial situation in order. Idk I try to just not give a fuck about anything and I've gotten better at not letting shit bother me but sometimes I start having a lot of negative thoughts about myself. I've come a long way from the depressed guy who never approached any girls but there's still a long way to go.

So to sum up I need to cut back on drinking. I need to get my professional/financial life in order. I need to start reading up more on game. I have mm and the game just never finished them. Ok that's all for now.

Ok posting again after another long absence. I am really going to try to approach this in a more organized fashion. So I suppose I should make a list of goals. Actually I think I made a list in an earlier post. OK yeah here they are, first short term goals:

1.) Be able to confidently approach any woman I want whenever I feel like it.
2.) Get better at making connections with not just the women that I am interested in but others as well.
3.) Get a new better paying job before March.
4.) Get back to a healthy lifestyle, less drinking, quit smoking.

Then I listed long term goals:

1.) Finally become confident, happy, and truly love myself and life. This is the main one, if I achieve this goal all the others should fall into place. I really believe that there is something fundamental tied up in this, somehow my inability to express myself with women I am attracted to sexually is related to everything else I struggle with in my life. It might sound crazy but I know it's true.
2.) Find the girl that I want, that I chose, and start a great relationship.
3.) Secure my future financially.
4.) Start a family.
5.) Live a great life.

So I'll start with the long term goals since that should be easiest. Ok the first one, haha, I must have been feeling emotional that day. I sort of believe the first part but after the past few months I seem to have not had much of a problem expressing a sexual interest, in fact I think I'm much to crude at it. My game definitely needs some refinement but that's why I'm here. But as far as loving myself and life 100% of the time? It's gotten much better and I have made a lot of progress in enjoying the moment and all, but sometimes I still feel angry and unhappy with my life, and I think the main reason is I'm sick of tired of being poor and stuck in a dead end cook job at the age of 35.

Hmmm this hasn't turned out to be that easy after all. The next part is though since 2, 3, 4, and 5 no I'm not there yet

Now short term, let's see, #1 I feel like I am almost there. I have gotten much, much better at doing this but usually if I don't have some kind of a buzz, I get pretty nervous. Also many times I'm out and I just feel tired after 1 drink and just don't have the energy to make approaches. But I have made several approaches in the daygame setting and gotten a few girls numbers. And I have made many nighttime approaches but my close rate is still pretty low. Usually what happens in either case is I get maybe a k-close and a number and then she flakes in the texting phase. So that leads to to #2, have not gotten better at making those connections! I get the initial spark and contact, then it fizzles. #3 no it hasn't happened and this is a major flaw in my game and really in my life. I am incredibly bored and frustrated with my current job. And #4, well I quit smoking, but healthy? Not quite. I drink too much and I am around too many friends who use a certain drug that has always been very popular in the bar scene. And oh yeah I am a cook at a bar too so I'm kinda stuck in that lifestyle. I still workout all the time though so that's good.

Alright I need to end this super long post. Two parting shots. Need to post here regularly, get more organized. And need to start making daily checklists with tasks that will lead to accomplishing these goals.

Dude, let me ask you something. Have you studied any PUA material? More importantly, is it related to your "field"?

When I first started, I made the mistake of approaching without studying any material. All it does is make you super AFC. When I did start studying game, I studies night game even though I'd only go out once a week, and it would be at a house party. I can't go to bars or some clubs. Even then I was studying the wrong material. The one party that I did do well at involved dancing. I ended up grinding with 5 girls and one of them let me grab at her tits.

Simply put, if you're doing daygame study daygame. I'm watching the daygame blueprint right now.

_________________
Previously Rugby7

My PUA Journey (2014): http://bit.ly/1yYjtSV
MY PUA Journey (2015): the-342-journal-vol-2-rugby7-vt187356.html
My Workout (Read this): http://bit.ly/1zIQncY

Record: 131
Record: 124

Hey Rugby, yes thanks for your input. Yes I have studied some material, but I agree I definitely need to study more. That's my whole point when I say I'm going to approach this in a more organized fashion. Although I will say unless your totally clueless, doing many approaches will eventually teach you what works and what doesn't, but who has time for that?

Anyway, the number one thing I need to do is quit doing drugs. I work at a bar in the downtown area of a major city and there are so many people who are in my group of friends and people around me who do coke it's ridiculous. So that's no excuse bottom line I need to quit doing this bullshit that doesn't get me anywhere at all.

Second, I need to get my career situation in order. I am 35 and I finally got my degree last year, but I'm still stuck in a dead end cook job. I've waited so long to try and do something with my life, sometimes when I think about all of the opportunities I've wasted, it's depressing. But this is the major problem. I finally realized I've been depressed almost my entire life. I take any situation and use it to make myself feel bad. Like I'm seeing all this stuff about veterans day and I'm like, 'why didn't I ever enlist' or 'why didn't I go to school and become a doctor' or 'why didn't I work harder on my music' etc, etc, etc. Whatever it is I just love to beat myself up and it's such a habit it's hard to break.

Anyway that's all I have for right now. Hopefully next time I will have much better news to report.

Ok just a quick update. Since my last post I've basically been exhausted. Been working nights then days, basically my schedule is all off kilter. I feel like the number one thing I need to focus on is getting a new career, so I've basically not been going out. Although I did go out for my cousins birthday Friday, we were basically just having a boys night so didn't really run any game.

Only thing to report is a really cute chick, a 7.5-8 who works at another bar downtown came into my bar one day when I was in there. Basically talked to her a bit, told a few jokes. At one point I looked at her phone and asked if she was sending a snapchat, and I told her to add me but whatever idk I should've gotten it but didn't that time. What I really should have done was get her number. Anyway I felt like she was giving some IOIs, touching me to make a point, flipping her hair. So maybe 3-4 days later she comes back. I'm doing a shot and she sees me, says something. I walk right over and tell her a joke, she touched me again. I told her she never gave me her snapchat ID, so I grab her phone to put it in (lol). Should've just called my phone and got her number that way. Anyway I've sent her a few snaps, she responded to some. Idk it's hard to tell with snapchat because sometimes I don't know if they've sent it specifically to me or if they're snapping it to everyone. Besides that I have about 3 girls I'm talking to on tinder.

Tomorrow I am going to post again. I will clarify using checklists to work towards my goal. Tonight I'm going to workout so that's something I can give myself credit for. Also I will choose an area of game to study, and make a plan on how I am going to approach things in a more organized fashion.

Yeah, stop doing drugs. It is imperative to keep your mind clean.

Anyway, if you're 35, it's not too late to enlist in the Army. Do it while you still can.

I got myself in a slump right now, so I don't feel qualified to give any PUA advice at the moment. I got major AA for the first time in a while and just couldn't approach.

_________________
Previously Rugby7

My PUA Journey (2014): http://bit.ly/1yYjtSV
MY PUA Journey (2015): the-342-journal-vol-2-rugby7-vt187356.html
My Workout (Read this): http://bit.ly/1zIQncY

Record: 131
Record: 124

Thanks for the input rugby, hope that AA goes away, sure it will. Ok well I've been sick as a dog for the past four days. I've been doing nothing but sleeping and trying to get over this illness. But I felt I should post something. I don't really have anything to report as I've been asleep for the past 4 days. Still feel the number one thing I need to focus on is making more $$$. Alright starting to fell better so hopefully I will have more to report soon.

Right well since my last post I've been lucky enough to come down with an especially intense case of conjunctivitis. Took me 3 days to figure out what it was. My awesome job cancelled our insurance and genius that I am I haven't signed up for the obamacare yet so today I drove around trying to find a clinic I can afford. Not to mention I spent 2 days in agony thinking I had just gotten something in my eye. So needless to say don't really have anything to report. Two things: get insurance, put in at least one job app tonight.

Well I have not posted here in forever, but I'm back for the New Year.

I guess this is a time when many people naturally feel the urge to reexamine their life, and lately I have been felling like I need to do a major re-examination.

Things have gotten much better for me since I was last posting here. Finally got out of my shitty job and am getting paid decent but it's still not what I want to do for the rest of my life. I had my first threesome and slept with a 24yo virgin, all at the age of 36. My skill with women has increased a ton, but I am still not where I'd like to be. I approach girls more than I ever did but I am still intimidated by really hot ones and although I am a pretty good talker, sometimes I feel like I have nothing interesting to say and feel fake/clumsy when trying to make small talk/be humorous.

Also I have become lazy and rely on Tinder to meet girls. IDK I hate going out drinking really and can't really go out at night as much as I used to since I work early. Although I am high energy, I don't have as much as I did 10 years ago. So I should be working on daygame, going out at night and not drinking but still trying to pick up chicks who are partying seems counterproductive to my real goals.

Ultimately my goal is to find someone who I am excited to be with and can be 100% into. I am 36 and I'd have to say I don't think I've ever had a serious relationship with a girl who I really wanted to be with. There have been at least 4 girls in the past 3 years who wanted me, girls who probably many guys would have wanted to be with who I just didn't feel it for one reason or another. Sometimes I think maybe it's really something wrong with me, like I always find a reason to not like all of them. Usually it's that they are older and already have kids or had some kind of reproductive issue where they can't have anymore, and I want someone without any but still with the possibility that we could-if we wanted to. This is hard to find at my age so probably going to have to find someone younger which is not a problem, but I need to have more touches, meet more girls, get more numbers, get more first dates, if I am going to find something that is hard to find.

Then again I know other girls who I would have been 100% into who just for one reason or another are not into me. So I don't think I should settle, i should be 100% in. And since I am having a hard time finding that person who I can be 100% into I need to meet more girls and get better at attracting and keeping the ones who I am interested in.

Anyway I am not going to go on further. I am going to start small here and keep realistic expectations, later today I am going to make another post laying out my goals and plans for the new year, just wanted to get the ball rolling here.

Sounds great! How did you end up scoring the 3some?

Hey thanks for the reply. The threesome was a funny story actually it happened because of snapchat.

I got a girls number some time ago she worked at a store I shopped at. Texted a bit trying to meet up but things fizzled and it never went anywhere. Maybe a few months later I start using snapchat and I add her on there. We view each others stories for a few months.

One night she's posting snaps from the beach near where we live, she's bragging about the hotel room she has. Anyway I was being kinda cocky in the snaps like you got the room but I know where the party is at. So anyway she invites me out. I go over to the beach and chill with these two girls and also their two friends (a lesbian couple.)

So I played it cool all night not even acting sexual or hitting on either of the straight girls. I took pains to get to know both of the lesbians and just basically be friendly to all four of the chicks. But I was picking up some vibes from the friend of the girl who I had her snapchat (the one I originally got her number). Anyways we try to go to the hot tub at the hotel but the staff kicks us out. So they're like fuck it we'll use the one in the room. So all 4 of us go to the jacuzzi tub in the hotel room and they pour bubble bath in there and break out champagne and we all get in the hot tub. Now at this point I am buzzed and I was making some hints to the 2 girls and were rubbing all up against each other in the hot tub and it's obvious I'm excited if you know what I mean.

Now for the most hilarious part: We are out of the hot tub and standing around it while one of the lesbians is occupying the bathroom. I make a joke like "fuck it I gotta piss really bad I'll just piss in the tub." To my surprise all the girls are like "yeah do it!"

So I'm like okay why not? So I climb up on the edge and whip it out, I'm totally limp and a bit shriveled and I can't go at first but then I'm like who gives a shit? So I let it go and piss in the tub and I swear they are all captivated. The one chick who's been feeling me even makes a comment about how she likes dick.

It might sound crazy but this totally impressed these chicks like I don't give a fuck what anyone thinks I'm not afraid if they can see my dick when it's not looking it's most impressive

Anyway comes to the end of the night sleeping situation needs to get decided. So the lesbians are setting up the couch/bed in the living room I'm laying in the bed in the bedroom trying to hide in the covers and pillows. So the one chick who originally invited me is like "where are you sleeping". I'm like "oh whatever I'll sleep on the floor in the hallway or in my car" and of course she's like "oh no I'll feel bad, you can sleep in here but don't try anything"

me-"of course not" (knowing smile)

So anyway everyone settles down, the lesbian couple is in the living room, we're in the bedroom the door is shut. Girl number one (my snapchat friend) is in the bathroom, I'm in bed with the friend who's been vibing me, and I make my move start making out with her.

We're totally into it, eyes closed and we hear "Oh so you guys are gonna fuck, hunh?" It's girl number one. "Ok fine I'll just watch"

She jumps into bed and starts making out with the other chick and me, all of our clothes quickly came off and I nail both of them multiple ways all night several times each while they get freaky on each other throughout. One of the best nights of my life! Both of these chicks are like 23-24 and I'm 36.

I played things perfect and almost all the decisions I made we're based on things I've learned from the PUA community. The guy I used to be never could have pulled this off.

Anyway the next day we went to the beach and it was super awkward and I haven't seen either of them since but IDGAF it is now a memory that I will cherish forever!

Ok I said I was going to post my long term goals, here they are:

1.) Start my own business within 2 years

2.) Find the girl I am exited to be with and make it work. Also within 2 years

3.) Focus on my music and write and record at least 3 songs within 9 months.

Ok that's it for now I'll expound upon these goals in a future post. Right now I am working on breaking these goals down into action items using some worksheets I downloaded. Hope everyone had a great New Year!