Hey guys I'm here because I feel like that I have a problem with my social life that I need to get handled.

Some background information. I'm 17 and a senior in high school. A lot of my time during high school was spent alone in a depression but HUNDREDS of psychological/self-help books later I just recently overcame it completely sometime around August. I would consider myself to be socially competent in the sense that I am by no means an awkward person to talk to. I can converse at a decent level but somehow I have A LOT of trouble keeping friends. One thing that I often struggle with is finding the motivation to actually go out and talk to new people. I can approach new people just fine if they are alone but I seem to have more trouble approaching if there is an actual group and I don't know anyone in it.

I'm by no means a social outcast. Although I am usually alone there are plenty of people who know who I am. Being alone you can say after awhile became some sort of a social preference. I could just sit there and think to myself all day about previous observations or insights that I've came across. I feel like having friends are important though even if I can't really feel motivated to create any. I'm the kid at school who is usually either hopping from group to group or walking alone by himself. I have jock acquaintances, art acquaintances, musician acquaintances, stoner acquaintances, and gamer acquaintances. The reason why I say acquaintances is because although I can talk to these people if I wanted to I just don't see the joy in doing so.

It's almost as If I lack the identity necessary in order to feel that sense of "belonging" with anyone. I often find that trapping yourself into any sort of identity just holds you back from being able to learn, change, and experience new things. I don't have low self esteem or anything. I don't perceive anyone including myself as being better or worse than anyone because I already understand that in an objective reality these things don't really exist. My sense of self-worth isn't based off of money, cars, clothes, looks, or the amount of women who like me.

I've come a long way but for now I would like to get to the main point.

Here are my main questions.

#1. What Is a friend?
#2. How important is it to have a social life and a group of friends?
#3. Where does the motivation come from to actually want to go out with other people?
#4. How do you actually enjoy talking to other people?
#5. Why is it that even when I'm talking with a group of people I still feel alone?
#6. Is not having any friends or being alone a sign of low value?

I know this is a lot to ask for but I'm in desperate need of answers and I don't know where else to go.

Do what you like, if you like staying at home then do that, if you like going out then do that, it's important to do what you like doing. I have a lot of friends who are always asking me to go out but I only go maybe once every two months or so because I like staying home. Plenty of teenagers like to stay home and read, this is not weird